Fools who try to deprive citizens of voting rights on trivial pretexts, risk the wrath of the cheif denizen of The Town Of Toon, not to mention the God Of Artillery:
Tooneronomy 03:11 Woe unto those owners of land and houses who say unto the renters, "Thou shalt not vote; for thou art but unworthy vagabonds." For in that hour of treachery the renters shall justly rise up, and come up against the unjust and perfidious property owners, and shall beat them as it were almost unto the death; and shall go forth unto the voting booth, and vote. And yet it is a kindness unto the treacherous property owners; for they may still drag themselves unto the booths to vote. But had they prevailed against the renters, fire would have come down out of heaven and would have consumed them; for strong and just is the God of Artillery, having power over fire, and justly scorches the unrighteous.
Tooneronomy 03:12 And woe unto those who are unable to pass the Standard Voter Competence Test; for they shall not vote. For niether the self-righteous property owners nor the stern but just renters will suffer them to vote. For verily has it been written that they are like unto ignorant demons who screweth up the wet dream, knoweth not enough to pour piss out of a boot, and defecate upon that which they do not put asunder. And the God of Artillery holdeth His fire and sayeth, "It is just. For they have not permanently been deprived of the right to vote. It is like unto the prohibition against the voting of ignorant and callow youth, who know not the ways of the world, and seeth not through the deceit of the demogogues, and yet believeth not the righeous either. And they must must not enter into the voting booth until they have gained a modicum of wisdom. And so it is also with those who passeth not the Standard Voter Competence Test. Only through diligent study shall they cometh unto the voting booth.
Tooneronomy 03:13 And all those aliens who have come into the Promised Land uninvited, shall not vote; for they have not the Standard Citizen's Identification Card, which cannot be forged. And their names are not written in the Citizens Database. Nor have they the knowledge and understanding of the Way of the land. And we needeth not the ladies crying because the story is sad. For the Way Of Legal Immigration is better than the old way of illegal alien infiltration and forgery of false documents which brought only grievous burdens and confusions upon the land.
Tooneronomy 03:14 And the God Of Artillery looked upon the laws of the Toon, and sayeth, "True and just are the laws of the Toon; for they bringeth not confusion and ruin upon the land, but righteousness and prosperity. And they make the evil to shudder, and the righteous to rejoice. And the demagogues say, "Surely we cannot prevail against an enlightened and informed populace." And the demagogues weep and wail, and gnash their teeth. And they rip their garments, and throw dust upon their heads. For their seats of power are lost, and they are desolate. And the righteous cometh and taketh their seats, and sayeth unto the demagogues, "Go ye out of here, ye unjust whores of perfidy." And the righteous replaceth the Democrat and Republican alike, who followeth not the straight and narrow path of righteousness. And even the President feareth the day of judgement, which cometh every four years, and spareth not the incompetent. And this is as it was envisioned in the beginning, before the Great Dumbing Down. For in those days they kneweth of which they spake; and spake not frivolously and falsely.
