Merged Chick Tracts

Cainkane1 said:
No. Most American Protestants feel that catholicism is a legitimate sect of Christianity whose followers are going to Heaven if they do what the bible says. Jack Chick is a renegade among the Protestants with his KJV only agenda.
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I may not have been clear. While most US protestants accept that catholicism is part of christianity there are quite a lot at the fringes that don't; many baptist sects, for example.
 
Craig4 said:
It's not just protestants. I had a priest in my Catholic high school who taught us about exorcism and how demons come up from hell. Apparently there are still Catholic priests who get trained in exorcism (though I'm given to understand it's not many).
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I've never run into or heard of a protestant believing in possession and exorcism. I've always associated that stuff with the Catholic church, and the protestant environments I've been in have all considered it a silly thing bought into by some Catholics, but not by others in the same religion who have better sense.

Now I see a cartoon by a protestant, aimed against the Catholic church, in which the protestant hero performs one and the Catholic priest is exposed as a fraud or failure by not doing it himself. It's like I'm looking at a cartoon from some other universe where certain things are backward.

* * *

In this cartoon, he said everybody's unrighteous. In another that was referred to in this thread, he pointed out a particular couple of cities that were once destroyed for their inhabitants' unrighteousness. Does he have an explanation for why God reacts to some people's unrighteousness one way and reacts to other people's unrighteousness a different way?
 
SomethingAwful did some good parodies of Chick Tracts (Sandwich Chef comes to mind).

I wish Lowtax were here. He'd give us the goldmine.
 
Took a look at the Chick tract DoomTown. It is hilarious. All those Mascu / Fem boys kissing and such. I wonder if Chick drew it with one hand so he could use the other for guess what.

As for the anti-Catholic aspects of Chick tracts. Chick thinks that Catholicism is a pagan, satanic religion that originated in ancient Babylonia. Crap like Chick produces is so over the top that its risible.
 
coalesce said:
"Doom Town" link, for those brave enough...

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0273/0273_01.asp

Michael
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Oh thank you for that. The hilarious thing about that one is that most of the gay men in that tract look they are lifted from Tom of Finland*.

*I will not link because would violate MA due to it being erotica. If you want to see what I am referring to, Google and take a look yourself.
 
TragicMonkey said:
When I lived in Tennessee, a Baptist kid told me his parents told him when he was little that Catholics had to wear their hair styled to hide their horns. He said they weren't trying to be funny.

Which just goes to show how ignorant they were--can anyone imagine having horns and not displaying them? They would be awesome! It would give you more options for hairstyles, and you could hang ornaments from them. A whole new realm of jewelry and accessories would open up! Gold plating! Wrap them in glowsticks! String things between them! I wonder if I could get them installed?
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Thanks TM, I really needed that WoW flashback.
 
I've always wondered about the whole Devil thing. I mean, the story goes "Archangel rebels against God. Archangel gets backside handed to him, and thrown in lake of fire. God does this as punishment." Catholics are told in some part of the Bible that there's an insurmountable gulf between Heaven and Hell (two issues with that: First, God=omnipotent. Second, obviously engineers have no souls, because none I've ever talked to have ever seen an insurmountable gulf. :D ).

Then he (somehow) escapes? gets set loose? and invades the world. Seriously, what happened????

Does he have an explanation for why God reacts to some people's unrighteousness one way and reacts to other people's unrighteousness a different way?
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Well, obviously God's female. She was on the rag back in the Old Testament. :D (I made the mistake of making this argument at supper once. My family is my dad, me, a female cat, my mother, and four sisters. I ended up bleeding--apparently they didn't get the humor.)
 
Dinwar said:
Well, obviously God's female. She was on the rag back in the Old Testament. :D (I made the mistake of making this argument at supper once. My family is my dad, me, a female cat, my mother, and four sisters. I ended up bleeding--apparently they didn't get the humor.)
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The key to comedy is timing. Evidently, your timing was off by a few days.
 
TragicMonkey said:
When I lived in Tennessee, a Baptist kid told me his parents told him when he was little that Catholics had to wear their hair styled to hide their horns. He said they weren't trying to be funny.

Which just goes to show how ignorant they were--can anyone imagine having horns and not displaying them? They would be awesome! It would give you more options for hairstyles, and you could hang ornaments from them. A whole new realm of jewelry and accessories would open up! Gold plating! Wrap them in glowsticks! String things between them! I wonder if I could get them installed?
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Apparently so.
 
Dinwar said:
I've always wondered about the whole Devil thing. I mean, the story goes "Archangel rebels against God. Archangel gets backside handed to him, and thrown in lake of fire. God does this as punishment." Catholics are told in some part of the Bible that there's an insurmountable gulf between Heaven and Hell (two issues with that: First, God=omnipotent. Second, obviously engineers have no souls, because none I've ever talked to have ever seen an insurmountable gulf. :D ).
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Satan won the war in Heaven, but he didn't have the muscle to kill God completely, so he just revised history a bit to make himself the good guy. The old God is righteously pissed about this.
 
The key to comedy is timing. Evidently, your timing was off by a few days.
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:D My dad's response to my comment was "Son, you've got to learn when to zig and when to zag."
 
Gawdzilla said:
Satan won the war in Heaven, but he didn't have the muscle to kill God completely, so he just revised history a bit to make himself the good guy. The old God is righteously pissed about this.
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No, no, no. There is no Satan, God just made him up so he could stay in power. As long as all the angels believe they are under threat of foreign invasion, they'll keep on accepting God as their dictator and not blink at the huge defense budget of Heaven. Occasionally God has to dress up as Satan and torture a few billion humans for eternity to keep the masquerade going, but he doesn't mind the extra work as it pays off handsomely. And, of course, if the angels ever find out they'll lynch him. It was a near miss two millennia ago when a sex scandal broke out, God was living with an underaged young man, but God quickly sent the guy to earth and spun some story about incarnation, redemption, etc etc. A very confusing piece of piffle, but it satisfied Heaven's media and the populace fell for it, so now God can live openly with a hot young guy who calls him "Daddy" and not suffer any ill press from it. God's kind of a sleazeball, really.
 
TragicMonkey said:
No, no, no. There is no Satan, God just made him up so he could stay in power. As long as all the angels believe they are under threat of foreign invasion, they'll keep on accepting God as their dictator and not blink at the huge defense budget of Heaven. Occasionally God has to dress up as Satan and torture a few billion humans for eternity to keep the masquerade going, but he doesn't mind the extra work as it pays off handsomely. And, of course, if the angels ever find out they'll lynch him. It was a near miss two millennia ago when a sex scandal broke out, God was living with an underaged young man, but God quickly sent the guy to earth and spun some story about incarnation, redemption, etc etc. A very confusing piece of piffle, but it satisfied Heaven's media and the populace fell for it, so now God can live openly with a hot young guy who calls him "Daddy" and not suffer any ill press from it. God's kind of a sleazeball, really.
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yeah, but from our (humanity's) perspective he just covered up one sex scandal with a slightly less onerous one. Even to this day, look at how many humans still think he knocked up some virgin.
 
cwalner said:
yeah, but from our (humanity's) perspective he just covered up one sex scandal with a slightly less onerous one. Even to this day, look at how many humans still think he knocked up some virgin.
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Well, you see, the shocking truth behind all that is
SHE'S A MAN, BABY! YEAH!
 
I sometimes feel like setting up a sect which teaches that Jesus and Satan are the same; sort of "You made the mess, lad - so it's up to you to clear it up".
 
What's funny is that many fundies make a big deal about Christianity being the largest religion in terms of membership, but at the same times say Catholics are not Christians. Yet, Roman Catholics, along with Eastern Orthodox denominations, make up about two thirds of the the Christians in the world. People of Chick's ilk actually assert that Catholics aren't Christians.
 
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