Sounds like a typical spiritual journey. The process of learning, disagreeing with what you learned, are confused by what you learned, what you learned is in opposition to what you are experiencing, so you suspend belief in what you learned and then finally forge on.
It sounds exactly like my spiritual journey towards skepticism except for that suspension of disbelief part towards the end there.
I learned a bunch of woo crap, from astrology to UFO conspiracies to Wicca to crystal magic and natural healing. I found reason to disagree with what I learned about those things, mainly since none of them seemed to have any effect whatsoever. I was confused by what I learned since everyone around me was also steeped in woo crap and believed in it deeply. What I learned about logic and reality was in opposition to what I thought I'd experienced while steeped in woo crap, until I suspended my acceptance and belief enough to learn about confirmation bias, paredolia, the law of large numbers, and other fallacies, and was able to realize that what I'd initially learned was based on wishful thinking and ignorance. I then discarded all of my previously cherished unproven beliefs in favor of logic, learning, and a reality-based view of the world.
I'm perfectly happy, and I don't have to shell out lots of money on people's awful books about their pet unproven theories on the nonexistent. No more witches, ghosts, prophecies, curses, spells, predictions, interdimensional sages, demons, angels, or unseen spiritual planes---I don't have to worry about any of those things ever again, and
finally my mind is at rest. It's grand, you should try it some day.
Of course, if you simply
must have a book, I recommend Sagan's
The Demon Haunted World. There are used copies available for less than $5, less than I paid for
The Prophecies of Nostradamus back in 1992 ($9.95, paperback).
