Note that one can from the inside distinguish a rotating lab in empty (flat) space from a non-rotating lab in empty (flat) space, but that's not what we're talking about. Those are two different physical situations. We're talking about using two different coordinate systems to describe the same physical situation.
I think this one paragraph encapsulates the problem in communication. I hold no expertise on the physics end of things, but I think I might have an angle on the perception thing. I keep reading threads like this and wondering if I'm not thinking hard enough or if I actually get what's going on.
While I have not done the math, it is my understanding that relativity allows me to pick any set of coordinates as a frame of reference (not using the official term reference frame in an attempt to keep it in layman's terms) and describe the universe. In other words, no matter how you look at it, the "rules" (equations) are going to allow you make predictions that will be born out by experiment.
Where Newton's laws "fail" is that they are inadequate for describing the universe under some frames of reference or at least some conditions (may not be using the correct terminology). While those "laws" of motion are perfectly suitable for everyday life, they are not useful for all conditions. For my own lack of a better term, Newton's laws "prefer" that you hang out here on earth for the most part and look at things without getting into badass speeds.
Where I think the confusion lies is trying to reconcile relativity with what we mere mortals understand based on our perceptions and knowledge. For example, I'm cool with believing that the earth rotates on its axis while orbiting the sun along with the other planets. Relativity says (I think) that you can describe all of this with the earth being "motionless" in a frame of reference, and all the laws of physics will still apply.
This leads to the inevitable, "Yeh, but the earth is
really orbiting the sun, right?" The response seems to be, "It doesn't make any difference. The laws of physics are the same."
"Yeh, but the earth is
really orbiting the sun, right? It's not really stationary with everything else flying about in paths that just don't seem
realistic."
"But it doesn't matter. When you pull your car into your garage, are you
really going 3MPH? It's convenient to look at it that way, but from the vantage point of another galaxy, the earth is rotating while orbiting the sun and the whole solar system is orbiting the galaxy. Is that any less
real than your 3MPH?"
That exchange seems to be the gist of what I'm reading here. If I'm wrong, please correct me. Assuming I've got that part right, here's the question I'd like the experts to address. If reasonable, please address it from your expert level as well as that of the Average Joe.
When I pull my car into my garage, is there any possible way for me to know that I pulled in at 3MPH rather (say) than the entire frigging planet moved towards my stationary car? If there is, that makes me "comfortable" that there exists a "reality" of some sorts. If there is, however, that doesn't mean there's a preferred reference frame because relativity, I believe, could explain the actions from any reference frame you could imagine and do it accurately.
For me personally, this is simply curiosity. I'm not trying to overturn the world of physics or solve some metaphysical conundrum.
Thanks for any time devoted to this. It is appreciated.