Prostitution and Child Support

[Tsukasa Buddha]

As for the particulars of how the child came to be under the circumstances, the father can try to get compensation if the sex worker did an illegal practice. However, that is a separate issue from the child's entitlements. They don't go away because of implied assumptions or what have you, if they did no one would ever pay it .

 

[Merko]

If you have a child, you're responsible. If you try to get out of that responsibility, you're worthy of nothing more than disrespect.

If you don't want the responsibility, you don't have a child. Simple as that.

Even if the woman signed a contract promising that she was sterile, I have absolutely no sympathies for this guy.

 

[Roma]

And for the record, I do not in any way condone the practice you describe.

Am I condoning something? I completely abhor prostitution as victimizaton of the weakest and most vulnerable persons in society so I hope you don't think I am condoning that.

Maybe I should add that there is no 100% birth control method.
I personally know two women who became pregnant after tubal ligations and one woman who became pregnant after her husband had a vasectomy.

 

[Kevin_Lowe]

Am I condoning something? I completely abhor prostitution as victimizaton of the weakest and most vulnerable persons in society so I hope you don't think I am condoning that.

Since many actual prostitutes don't see the industry that way, I'm not sure if that's a defensible position.

 

[EeneyMinnieMoe]

As for the particulars of how the child came to be under the circumstances, the father can try to get compensation if the sex worker did an illegal practice. However, that is a separate issue from the child's entitlements. They don't go away because of implied assumptions or what have you, if they did no one would ever pay it .

Exactly. A regular Joe who had intercourse with a regular Jane and gave her a baby doesn't get to play the "She told me it was ok if I didn't use a condom!" card or any other excuse from "Why didn't she get an abortion?!" to "I swear she tricked me!" to get out of paying child support. Why does the mother being a hooker and the father being a john change that?

Is it only illegal for the hooker to do it? Isn't it illegal for the john, too?

 

[Nosi]

Having just a little experience in that business I don't think that not wearing a condom was her idea. On the contrary it is rather difficult to get a "customer" to wear a condom if he doesn't want to.

What next..... she "raped" him to get herself pregnant?

There is a trick women can use to get themselves pregnant with out the men knowing to entrap them. This method is common for blackmailing wealthy men who are cheating on their wives.

After having sex with a condom, the couple toss the condom in the trash, and the man leaves. Woman takes condom out of trash, turns it inside out, and well, contents are still viable.

 

[Merko]

After having sex with a condom, the couple toss the condom in the trash, and the man leaves. Woman takes condom out of trash, turns it inside out, and well, contents are still viable.

Sure. Or the condom might just leak. And the pills may not work. It happens.

Every child deserves a loving father and a loving mother. If the mother is a treacherous good-for-nothing, that does in no way excuse the father to shun his responsibility. By having sex with someone he should have known that a child might be conceived, and if that happens he should face the consequences.

In my opinion, if this woman handed the guy the baby and offered to give him $100 a week, how could he refuse? Apparently he thought that was enough for her to care for it.

 

[arthwollipot]

Since many actual prostitutes don't see the industry that way, I'm not sure if that's a defensible position.

There are extremes in the sex industry. There certainly is a huge amount of exploitation and sexual slavery involved, and Roma is quite right to abhor that. There are also many prostitutes who do the job voluntarily, take pride in their work, and maintain high standards. You can't tar the entire sex industry with the same brush - regardless of which end of the spectrum you are referring to.

 

[Roma]

There are also many prostitutes who do the job voluntarily,

The term voluntarily bothers me when I think of sex trade workers.

I don't think I've ever heard of a prostitute who wouldn't rather be doing something different if it paid the same amount of money.
Even the sex workers in the brothels only endure their clients.

Voluntary is not the same as resignation,
I have never met or heard of a prostitute who came from a position of financial and educational strength to pursue a job in the sex trade industry.
If so then I could only suspect that prostitute to suffer from a mental or addiction disability, or having suffered from sexual abuse as a child.

Of course I'm not an industry spokesperson.

 

[thaiboxerken]

She should've had an abortion.

 

[rjh01]

The term voluntary bothers me when I think of unskilled workers.

I do not know anyone who would want to do this sort of work if there were other work available.

Of course I'm not an industry spokesperson.

 

[Ivor the Engineer]

Hold on now. There's a reasonable expectation that there would be no child from this coupling. And, unlike a real BF/GF situmication, she is the professional.

<snip>

It was her mistake, and in the professional realm of her job. It is 100% her financial burden.

<snip>

I agree. In general men do not use prostitutes with the intention of becoming fathers. They go for no-strings sex.

If she was offering no-strings sex on a professional basis she (or her employer) should have taken out insurance to cover the costs of dealing with such an on-the-job accident.

 

[Nosi]

The term voluntarily bothers me when I think of sex trade workers.

I don't think I've ever heard of a prostitute who wouldn't rather be doing something different if it paid the same amount of money.
Even the sex workers in the brothels only endure their clients.

Voluntary is not the same as resignation,
I have never met or heard of a prostitute who came from a position of financial and educational strength to pursue a job in the sex trade industry.
If so then I could only suspect that prostitute to suffer from a mental or addiction disability, or having suffered from sexual abuse as a child.

Of course I'm not an industry spokesperson.

There are more aspects to 'the sex industry' than straight up prostitution. Sometimes, living people are not even involved. Take cyber sex. Cyber sex can involve digitally created sexual parters made by the good Lord only knows whom. Your partner can be someone in a chatroom typing text to a 'living doll' created by a lab, to a latex 'sex toy' while you may watch digitally created animated pornography. Google "sex toy" because I don't want to cross lines here describing them...ahem.

Often, the creators are getting off on their creations as well as getting paid for their works.

 

[Tsukasa Buddha]

The term voluntarily bothers me when I think of sex trade workers.

I don't think I've ever heard of a prostitute who wouldn't rather be doing something different if it paid the same amount of money.
Even the sex workers in the brothels only endure their clients.

Voluntary is not the same as resignation,
I have never met or heard of a prostitute who came from a position of financial and educational strength to pursue a job in the sex trade industry.
If so then I could only suspect that prostitute to suffer from a mental or addiction disability, or having suffered from sexual abuse as a child.

Of course I'm not an industry spokesperson.

Hello.

This comes up with strippers and other sex workers as well. So what if they were abused as a child or has certain mental problems? If they got a different job, they would just be a burger flipper with a past of sexual abuse.

Of course, I'm still waiting out the statute of limitations.

 

[JFrankA]

The term voluntarily bothers me when I think of sex trade workers.

I don't think I've ever heard of a prostitute who wouldn't rather be doing something different if it paid the same amount of money.
Even the sex workers in the brothels only endure their clients.

Voluntary is not the same as resignation,
I have never met or heard of a prostitute who came from a position of financial and educational strength to pursue a job in the sex trade industry.
If so then I could only suspect that prostitute to suffer from a mental or addiction disability, or having suffered from sexual abuse as a child.

Of course I'm not an industry spokesperson.

No offense, Roma, but it bothers me when someone makes a judgement on a profession based on a stereotype, and I'm sorry, what you describe is a stereotype.

I am in the adult industry, my own independent personal business, and I can tell you that I work with some "professionals". I know that these people are nothing what you describe.

Some of these professionals are doing very well on their own, with "normal" problems that are not drug or abuse related.

 

[JFrankA]

Hello.

This comes up with strippers and other sex workers as well. So what if they were abused as a child or has certain mental problems? If they got a different job, they would just be a burger flipper with a past of sexual abuse.

Of course, I'm still waiting out the statute of limitations.

Good point. Also, when I was a teen-ager, I knew quite a few burger-flippers my age at that time who were using a lot of drugs.....


ETA: Getting back to the topic, there seems to me some missing pieces to the story. Was there a DNA test to see if he was really the father? Was there a discussion about her having an abortion or giving the child up for adoption? Hell, for all we know, the two of them might've been in love or something and they both wanted the child until he changed his mind.

There's just too many unknowns left open in this story for me to make a call......

 

[Roma]

Hello.

This comes up with strippers and other sex workers as well. So what if they were abused as a child or has certain mental problems? If they got a different job, they would just be a burger flipper with a past of sexual abuse.

So what ?

It matters, to me and many other people if a child is sexually exploited and eventually ends up in the sex trade industry. It really does matter a lot.

It also matters if a human being with a mental disability or drug addiction is exploited by uncaring members of society who think nothing of the additional harm inflicted upon that human being simply to gratify a sexual urge.

It makes me very sad to think of human beings being degraded and utilized without a thought to their self and dignity, and sad to think of people in society who regard the sexual use of these human beings as justifiable and voluntary.

There is a hundred times more value and pride to be found flipping burgers than can ever be found from giving a blow job to a slob for 20 bucks.

It hurts me just to think about the question of whether or not this should matter. And if that burger flipper had been sexually abused as a child then it would matter much more that he/she was not being revictimized in the sex trade industry.

And now I see that a few posters regard this prostitute as a person of such low moral character that she must have "tricked" the poor client into getting her pregnant, and furthermore she should never be allowed to be a mother to this child. Even more.... this child should not be given the same rights as children not born to prostitutes, how dare the father be asked to pay child support for this child thing.

 

[Personal Grudge]

So what ?

It matters, to me and many other people if a child is sexually exploited and eventually ends up in the sex trade industry. It really does matter a lot.

It also matters if a human being with a mental disability or drug addiction is exploited by uncaring members of society who think nothing of the additional harm inflicted upon that human being simply to gratify a sexual urge.

It makes me very sad to think of human beings being degraded and utilized without a thought to their self and dignity, and sad to think of people in society who regard the sexual use of these human beings as justifiable and voluntary.

There is a hundred times more value and pride to be found flipping burgers than can ever be found from giving a blow job to a slob for 20 bucks.

It hurts me just to think about the question of whether or not this should matter. And if that burger flipper had been sexually abused as a child then it would matter much more that he/she was not being revictimized in the sex trade industry.

And now I see that a few posters regard this prostitute as a person of such low moral character that she must have "tricked" the poor client into getting her pregnant, and furthermore she should never be allowed to be a mother to this child. Even more.... this child should not be given the same rights as children not born to prostitutes, how dare the father be asked to pay child support for this child thing.

I certainly cannot view the sex industry as a "victim-free" occupation. I'm sure there are several prostitutes and porno actors/actresses who have very tragic pasts that contributed to their choice of occupation.

Of course, generalities never help these kinds of arguments. I'm also confident that many prostitutes (and porno actors) genuinely enjoy the life they live. To state that every woman would find more pride in flipping burgers than in giving a blow-job... well, I think that may underestimate the variety of personalities that exist in this world.

Either way... regardless of the circumstances of a pregnancy, I would not agree with anyone getting a break from child support. I agree that child support is about the child... it's not about the mother or the father.

 

[Tsukasa Buddha]

So what ?

I asked that first !

It matters, to me and many other people if a child is sexually exploited and eventually ends up in the sex trade industry. It really does matter a lot.

Why?

Also, perhaps this is just a difference in our word usage, but don't conflate the "sex trade industry" with sex work in general. They are different things, and anti-sex work politicians like to say one necessarily means the other.

It also matters if a human being with a mental disability or drug addiction is exploited by uncaring members of society who think nothing of the additional harm inflicted upon that human being simply to gratify a sexual urge.

What is the additional harm? Yes, psychiatrists will say we don't set normal boundaries or what have you, but that being a function allowing us to do a job others might not doesn't mean we are being exploited. As for addicts, they are in every industry. There is nothing inherently wrong with an addict working, but of course it would be better if they quit.

It makes me very sad to think of human beings being degraded and utilized without a thought to their self and dignity, and sad to think of people in society who regard the sexual use of these human beings as justifiable and voluntary.

Some of us don't see the world in that view.

And some of us mentally disabled have trouble with any other work. And society does not look on us pleasingly like that.

There is a hundred times more value and pride to be found flipping burgers than can ever be found from giving a blow job to a slob for 20 bucks.

First, that is a very below market price. I mean, maybe your street walker or hustler might do things cheap, but the rest of us get paid by the hour.

Second, what exactly is that pride or value? I'll tell you when I got my first offers, my pride went up. It also helped me resolve some of my body image problems.

And we all know value is subjective. I'd prefer getting more value pleasing someone than seven dollars and change helping someone become obese.

It hurts me just to think about the question of whether or not this should matter. And if that burger flipper had been sexually abused as a child then it would matter much more that he/she was not being revictimized in the sex trade industry.

Here we are. Why is sex work "revictimizing" and why is sex work part of "the sex trade industry". Yes, there are the nightmare cases, but those can't be generalized. Sex work is a large and varied field.

 

[JFrankA]

So what ?

It matters, to me and many other people if a child is sexually exploited and eventually ends up in the sex trade industry. It really does matter a lot.

Not all sexually exploited children become prostitutes and not all prostitutes were sexually exploited children.

It also matters if a human being with a mental disability or drug addiction is exploited by uncaring members of society who think nothing of the additional harm inflicted upon that human being simply to gratify a sexual urge.

Well good for you. Go find those people specifically and take them out of any job that exploits them. Why limit it to just professions that cater to sexual urges? There are plenty of other "respectable" professions that have addicts and the mentally disabled that are exploited.

Let's start with any evangelists or religious leaders who claim to "heal" the sick or disabled in the name of god in order up their donations.......

It makes me very sad to think of human beings being degraded and utilized without a thought to their self and dignity, and sad to think of people in society who regard the sexual use of these human beings as justifiable and voluntary.

Some people enjoy this work and not see it as degrading. You see it as degrading. Me personally, I think it's very uplifting and takes someone special to be able to make a person feel human touch, share sexuality that they might not be able to get from others, relieve their tension, make them feel special, fulfill a fantasy, share intimacy that they might not be getting, and do it all without judgment.

There is a hundred times more value and pride to be found flipping burgers than can ever be found from giving a blow job to a slob for 20 bucks.

But I bet that "slob" feels much better, much happier and more relieved than eating a piece of fatty meat that would make him more of a slob.

It hurts me just to think about the question of whether or not this should matter. And if that burger flipper had been sexually abused as a child then it would matter much more that he/she was not being revictimized in the sex trade industry.

Again, you are equating anyone in the sexual industry as a victim. That's just plain wrong, judgmental and stereotypical thinking.

And now I see that a few posters regard this prostitute as a person of such low moral character that she must have "tricked" the poor client into getting her pregnant, and furthermore she should never be allowed to be a mother to this child.

Read it again. The thought is not "did the prostitute tricked the client", the thought is "did the woman tricked the man". Sorry, it's a fact that every man think about because it is a very clear possibility. That is, "is this woman (i.e. wife, girlfriend) just saying she's taking the pill just so she can get pregnant so I'm trapped?" Don't say that no woman would do that outside of the sex industry.

Even more.... this child should not be given the same rights as children not born to prostitutes, how dare the father be asked to pay child support for this child thing.

Re-read my post on this. There's not enough information for me to make a judgment here. We don't even know for sure (based on the article) if he is even the father! We don't know if abortion was even discussed.

It's possible the man is being a jerk and it's just as possible that the woman is extorting the man. We really don't have enough information to know for sure.



ETA: Good post, btw, Tsukasa Buddha