blasphemous/anti-religious lyrics

tuc0 · Jun 14, 2009

For a change of pace, let's have some nice, clean, friendly shaking of fists at god.

I'm sure everyone knows Metal is full of christ-raping, god-hating songs, but what about other genres? Is there any blasphemous Reggae out there? Anti-religious Hip Hop? A heretical opera?

I'm ready to be surprised

--------------------------

Examples:

Anti religion

Blasphemy

Dancing David · Jun 14, 2009

The following lyrics are copyrighted and owned but as a co-author I have the right to use them. You are not free to do so, if you wish to use the song and lyrics I can e-mail you the address of the person who does own the rights.

(Set in a country chord pattern very similar to an upbeat Red River Valley.)
(The chorus is sort like a footbal fight song.)
And that is geerage like ghee-rahj for garage.
Should be sung with gusto, a smile on your face and a laugh in your voice.

Shiny Nails (AKA the International Anti-Xian Song)

MG1962 · Jun 14, 2009

Not sure if this counts. But from Dire Straits - Industrial Disease

"Two men say they are Jesus, one of them must be wrong"

HansMustermann · Jun 14, 2009

Well, not sure about religion, but trying to shock is as old as art itself.

E.g., off the top of my head, Mozart composed such pieces as (may the mods have mercy on me

) "Leck mich im Arsch" (lick me in the a**) and the sequel "Leck mir den Arsch fein recht schön sauber" (lick my a** fine and nicely clean). Not exactly a blasphemy, but I can imagine that quite a few ladies would have been shocked that their sons listen to that kind of thing

But a quick perusal of the Index Librorum Prohibitorum reveals that they had quite the number of authors and books in there. Mostly just touching aspects of morals, corruption, secular-vs-church issues, etc. But if a Pope himself decided that, say, Les Miserables by Victor Hugo is heretical enough to be put on the index, it doesn't get more official than that. Those metal bands may bleat about the Antichrist until they're blue in the face, but Victor Hugo or Alexandre Dumas have the official papal stamp of heresy, so to speak

You can't argue with _that_.

And then there's the Marquis de Sade, who not only landed two works on the Index, but got a vice named after him. It may not be an original sin, but having perfected an existing one enough to have it named after you, well, that has to count as something

tuc0 · Jun 14, 2009

Dancing David said:
The following lyrics are copyrighted and owned but as a co-author I have the right to use them. You are not free to do so, if you wish to use the song and lyrics I can e-mail you the address of the person who does own the rights.

(Set in a country chord pattern very similar to an upbeat Red River Valley.)
(The chorus is sort like a footbal fight song.)
And that is geerage like ghee-rahj for garage.
Should be sung with gusto, a smile on your face and a laugh in your voice.

Shiny Nails (AKA the International Anti-Xian Song)

Shiny Nails (AKA The International Anti-Xian Song)

Preacher man talking on the TV
Tells me the bible is true
Tells me the lord in returning
He is coming back for me and for you
Now don’t you think that it’s scary
The end of the world might be near
If the Xians were to take over
They just might outlaw beer

(Chorus)
So keep some two by fours in your closet
Just in case jesus returns
Keep a can of gas in the corner
And hope that the sucker will burn
Keep a twelve gauge shotgun in the bedroom
In case he comes a stealing in the night
And keep an atom bomb in the garage
Just in case he can put up a fight.

Well they really made a mess of it last time
They should have made sure he was dead
They should have burned up his body
After the cut off his head
This time were gonna do it better
We're gonna show him whose boss
But we don’t want to break with tradition
So we'll start with the
Old rugged cross

(Chorus)
So keep some two by fours in your closet
Just in case jesus returns
Keep a can of gas in the corner
And hope that the sucker will burn
Keep a twelve gauge shotgun in the bedroom
In case he comes a stealing in the night
And keep an atom bomb in the garage
Just in case he can put up a fight.

Nice

I also always wondered how you pronounce "Xian". Is it "EXian"? "Ksian"? "Cross-ian"?

slingblade · Jun 14, 2009

tuc0 said:
Nice

I also always wondered how you pronounce "Xian". Is it "EXian"? "Ksian"? "Cross-ian"?

"Christian." It's just a shortened form for writing. Doesn't change how you pronounce it.

tuc0 · Jun 14, 2009

slingblade said:
"Christian." It's just a shortened form for writing. Doesn't change how you pronounce it.

Thanks. Now I'm a bit disappointed.

tuc0 · Jun 14, 2009

HansMustermann said:
Well, not sure about religion, but trying to shock is as old as art itself.

E.g., off the top of my head, Mozart composed such pieces as (may the mods have mercy on me) "Leck mich im Arsch" (lick me in the a**) and the sequel "Leck mir den Arsch fein recht schön sauber" (lick my a** fine and nicely clean). Not exactly a blasphemy, but I can imagine that quite a few ladies would have been shocked that their sons listen to that kind of thing

But a quick perusal of the Index Librorum Prohibitorum reveals that they had quite the number of authors and books in there. Mostly just touching aspects of morals, corruption, secular-vs-church issues, etc. But if a Pope himself decided that, say, Les Miserables by Victor Hugo is heretical enough to be put on the index, it doesn't get more official than that. Those metal bands may bleat about the Antichrist until they're blue in the face, but Victor Hugo or Alexandre Dumas have the official papal stamp of heresy, so to speak You can't argue with _that_.

And then there's the Marquis de Sade, who not only landed two works on the Index, but got a vice named after him. It may not be an original sin, but having perfected an existing one enough to have it named after you, well, that has to count as something

Yeah, Mozart was a Schweinigel

I agree with you but would like to limit the scope to blasphemy and similar subjects so this doesn't get moved to some more general part of the forum. And since there are many knowledgeable people here: is there an anti-religious tradition in other societies besides those influenced by Christianity? I know there are severe anti blasphemy laws in most Muslim countries for example, but what about Jews, Hindus, Shintoists?

HansMustermann · Jun 14, 2009

Oh, _some_ kind of anti-blasphemy laws are as old as humanity itself.

E.g., one of the historically documented guys tried for blasphemy was the Roman consul and general Publius Claudius Pulcher. Before the naval battle of Drepana, he was supposed to first consult the augurs by seeing if the sacred chickens eat the food offered. (I wish I were making this up. They really were that superstitious.) When the sacred chickens refused to eat, which was a very bad omen, the annoyed Claudius Pulcher chucked them into the sea, saying, "so that they might drink, since they refused to eat!" And ordered his fleet to attack anyway.

Incidentally, the chicken were right, as the battle turned out to be a disaster for the Roman navy.

Which, of course didn't help the case of Claudius Pulcher, when he was recalled to Rome, removed from his consulship and tried for impiety. He only got fined for it, btw, since you had to go a lot further with the blasphemy to get a death sentence.

TimCallahan · Jun 14, 2009

One song that has fundies foaming at the mouth is neither metal nor rap. It's the late John Lennon's "Imagine."

BirdyBuddy · Jun 14, 2009

I've always liked this bit from Concrete Blonde's Tomorrow Wendy's:

I told the priest-don't count on any second coming.
God got his ass kicked the first time He came down here slumming
He had the balls to come, the Gall to die and then forgive us-
No, I don't wonder why I wonder what he thought it would get us-

I Ratant · Jun 14, 2009

HansMustermann said:
...
And then there's the Marquis de Sade, who not only landed two works on the Index, but got a vice named after him. It may not be an original sin, but having perfected an existing one enough to have it named after you, well, that has to count as something

.
Didn't de Sade invent a few nasties?

I Ratant · Jun 14, 2009

The Priest, by Joni Mitchell
"The priest sat in the airport bar
...
Then he took his contradictions out
And he splashed them on my brow.."

Denver · Jun 14, 2009

I recall Billy Joel taking some heat for "Only the Good Die Young"

Paul2 · Jun 14, 2009

Me? I'm old school, gimme that old-time blasphemy.

All the explicitness of the above examples pale in comparison to the derision and sacrilege that is below the surface of the following classic:

First you get down on your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Do whatever steps you want, if
You have cleared them with the Pontiff.
Everybody say his own
Kyrie eleison,
Doin' the Vatican Rag.

Get in line in that processional,
Step into that small confessional,
There, the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original.
If it is, try playin' it safer,
Drink the wine and chew the wafer,
Two, four, six, eight,
Time to transubstantiate!

So get down upon your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Make a cross on your abdomen,
When in Rome do like a Roman,
Ave Maria,
Gee it's good to see ya,
Gettin' ecstatic an'
Sorta dramatic an'
Doin' the Vatican Rag!

tuc0 · Jun 14, 2009

HansMustermann said:
Oh, _some_ kind of anti-blasphemy laws are as old as humanity itself.

E.g., one of the historically documented guys tried for blasphemy was the Roman consul and general Publius Claudius Pulcher. Before the naval battle of Drepana, he was supposed to first consult the augurs by seeing if the sacred chickens eat the food offered. (I wish I were making this up. They really were that superstitious.) When the sacred chickens refused to eat, which was a very bad omen, the annoyed Claudius Pulcher chucked them into the sea, saying, "so that they might drink, since they refused to eat!" And ordered his fleet to attack anyway.

Incidentally, the chicken were right, as the battle turned out to be a disaster for the Roman navy.

Which, of course didn't help the case of Claudius Pulcher, when he was recalled to Rome, removed from his consulship and tried for impiety. He only got fined for it, btw, since you had to go a lot further with the blasphemy to get a death sentence.

Great story. Give us more

TimCallahan said:
One song that has fundies foaming at the mouth is neither metal nor rap. It's the late John Lennon's "Imagine."

Well... he was bigger than Jesus, a bit of foaming at the mouth is in order.

BirdyBuddy said:
I've always liked this bit from Concrete Blonde's Tomorrow Wendy's:

I told the priest-don't count on any second coming.
God got his ass kicked the first time He came down here slumming
He had the balls to come, the Gall to die and then forgive us-
No, I don't wonder why I wonder what he thought it would get us-

I Ratant said:
The Priest, by Joni Mitchell
"The priest sat in the airport bar
...
Then he took his contradictions out
And he splashed them on my brow.."

Denver said:
I recall Billy Joel taking some heat for "Only the Good Die Young"

Can you quote the juicy parts?

Paul2 said:
Me? I'm old school, gimme that old-time blasphemy.

All the explicitness of the above examples pale in comparison to the derision and sacrilege that is below the surface of the following classic:

First you get down on your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Do whatever steps you want, if
You have cleared them with the Pontiff.
Everybody say his own
Kyrie eleison,
Doin' the Vatican Rag.

Get in line in that processional,
Step into that small confessional,
There, the guy who's got religion'll
Tell you if your sin's original.
If it is, try playin' it safer,
Drink the wine and chew the wafer,
Two, four, six, eight,
Time to transubstantiate!

So get down upon your knees,
Fiddle with your rosaries,
Bow your head with great respect,
And genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!

Make a cross on your abdomen,
When in Rome do like a Roman,
Ave Maria,
Gee it's good to see ya,
Gettin' ecstatic an'
Sorta dramatic an'
Doin' the Vatican Rag!

Love that

Dancing David · Jun 14, 2009

slingblade said:
"Christian." It's just a shortened form for writing. Doesn't change how you pronounce it.

It is also considered to be offensive by some.

Dancing David · Jun 14, 2009

Dear God by XTC

Dear god,
Hope you got the letter,
And I pray you can make it better down here.
I dont mean a big reduction in the price of beer,
But all the people that you made in your image,
See them starving on their feet,
cause they dont get enough to eat

From god,
I cant believe in you.

Dear god,
Sorry to disturb you,
But I feel that I should be heard loud and clear.
We all need a big reduction in amount of tears,
And all the people that you made in your image,
See them fighting in the street,
cause they cant make opinions meet,
About god,
I cant believe in you.

Did you make disease, and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too!

Dear god,
Dont know if you noticed,
But your name is on a lot of quotes in this book.
Us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look,
And all the people that you made in your image,
Still believing that junk is true.
Well I know it aint and so do you,
Dear god,
I cant believe in,
I dont believe in,

I wont believe in heaven and hell.
No saints, no sinners,
No devil as well.
No pearly gates, no thorny crown.
Youre always letting us humans down.
The wars you bring, the babes you drown.
Those lost at sea and never found,
And its the same the whole world round.
The hurt I see helps to compound,
That the father, son and holy ghost,
Is just somebodys unholy hoax,
And if youre up there youll perceive,
That my hearts here upon my sleeve.
If theres one thing I dont believe in...

Its you,
Dear god.

Denver · Jun 14, 2009

Denver said:
I recall Billy Joel taking some heat for "Only the Good Die Young"

tuc0 said:
Can you quote the juicy parts?

Come out virginia, dont let me wait
You catholic girls start much too late
Aw but sooner or later it comes down to fate
I might as well be the one

They showed you a statue, told you to pray
They built you a temple and locked you away
But they never told you the price that you pay
For things that you might have done.....
Only the good die young
Thats what I said
Only the good die young x2

You might have heard I run with a dangerous crowd
We aint too pretty we aint too proud
We might be laughing a bit too loud
Aw but that never hurt no one

Come on virginia show me a sign
Send up a signal Ill throw you the line
The stained-glass curtain youre hiding behind
Never lets in the sun
Darlin only the good die young

You got a nice white dress and a party on your confirmation
You got a brand new soul
Mmmm, and a cross of gold
But virginia they didnt give you quite enough information
You didnt count on me
When you were counting on your rosary
(oh woah woah)

They say theres a heaven for those who will wait
Some say its better but I say it aint
Id rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints
The sinners are much more fun...

You know that only the good die young

six7s · Jun 14, 2009

All Things Dull and Ugly

All things dull and ugly,
all creatures short and squat.
All things rude and nasty,
the Lord God made the lot.

Each little snake that poisons,
each little wasp that stings.
He made their brutish venum,
he made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous
All evil great and small.
All things foul and dangerous,
the Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
each beastly little squid,
Who made the spiny urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
all pox both great and small.
Putrid foul and gangrenous,
the Lord God made them all.

Amen.

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