I'm sticking to my original theory that you were never a "conspiracy believer" as you call it, but someone who thought that this would be some clever way to make the "twoofers" look dumb.
Well then that's one more lie you believe. Congratulations on becoming one more step removed from reality. Why would I need to make up a story to make you look dumb when you guys do a fine job of it yourselves?
Seriously, I did believe the conspiracy. I believed it wholeheartedly, but I came to realize that it's just not true. It's a bunch of guys looking at non-existent "holes" in the story to discredit it, and then they pull a story out of their butts to replace it. It's the same thing that the creationists are doing. There's no evidence that the United States government was behind it, no matter how much I wanted to believe that.
And believe me, I wanted to believe that. At the time I was a naïve Marxist and I did not have much sympathy for anybody involved with American politics. I believed the American government to be inherently tyrannical, and I was willing to accept any story that came my way that implicated them in some horrible act.
I'm sure you have similar emotional hang-ups about the government, or at least about the current administration. I'm sure you disliked this administration from the beginning, before 9/11, and I'm sure your conspiracy delusion is at least partly fueled by these emotions.
When I first got wind of the conspiracy, I went to all the conspiracy websites that blamed my enemies for bad things. I immersed myself in the conspiracy ideas that were out there on the Net. I watched the movies, I read the popular conspiracy websites, but I didn't take a close look at the opposition.
When you look only at the websites with half-truths that poke holes in the story as it really happened, you get the picture that this whole thing is full of anomalies that can't be explained. And when all your information is coming from people who hate the Bush administration and want to blame this on them, of course they're going to try to explain those anomalies in terms of pinning the blame on Bush. That's pretty much where I found myself. I didn't look at the sites that debunk the 9/11 conspiracy myths, so I didn't know the real answers to the questions the conspiracy theorists were raising. It was natural, in that state of ignorance and that emotional state, to accept the conspiracy theory.
But (gasp) over time my political opinions changed (EDIT: just for the record, I still have an extreme dislike for Bush and the Bush administration, but I'm no longer a Marxist), and I actually bothered to look at the explanations for the anomalies that I had learned about only through pro-conspiracy websites. Gradually, after I thoroughly examined
both sides of the argument, I acquired enough information that it changed my stance on the conspiracy issue and I decided I was no longer convinced by the conspiracy explanation.
Call me a liar if you will. It only enhances my confidence that you're willing to deny reality to go on believing what you want to believe. The conspiracy to you is so obviously true that you don't think somebody who had intimate knowledge of it could give that belief up. I understand that. I used to believe that myself. It was inconceivable that I could ever deny the evidence which at the time seemed so clear to me. But I came to the understanding that I was mistaken, and I sincerely hope that you do as well. It is a humbling and maturing experience.