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Favorate Quotes

Since you don't stipulate whether they really were said, or just should have been said, my perrenial favorite is:

"One day I'm going to be bigger than Orson Welles." -a young Marlon Brando
 
"All the Dude ever wanted was his rug back."
The Dude

"Obviously you're not a golfer."
The Dude

"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company."
Mark Twain

"I didn't attend the funeral. But I sent a nice note saying that I approved of it."
Mark Twain

"Every science has for its basis a system of principles as fixed and unalterable as those by which the universe is regulated and governed. Man cannot make principles; he can only discover them."
Thomas Paine

"Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories."
Arthur C. Clark

"Humanity has the stars in its future, and that future is too important to be lost under the burden of juvenile folly and ignorant superstition."
Isaac Asimov

"A central lesson of science is that to understand complex issues (or even simple ones), we must try to free our minds of dogma and to guarantee the freedom to publish, to contradict, and to experiment. Arguments from authority are unacceptable."
Carl Sagan

"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring."
Carl Sagan

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love."
Carl Sagan

"Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known."
Carl Sagan
 
"Know thyself" --Socrates

"To thine ownself be true" --Lord Polonius
 
Roboramma said:
Well then, here's one I liked:

First, strip out the references to long-dead philosophers. If you can't express your idea without relying on other people's thoughts, you don't have an idea.
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Meh. It's true we often do rely too much on long-dead philosophers but I'm not for chucking them entirely.
 
Wiley Brooks (Breatharian) explains why he eats food ~

"The less food you have in the body, the more air is circulated through the body, which replaces the food. Which means a Breatharian, instead of taking in 110 lbs. of air a day, is probably taking in 1,000 lbs. a day. Now in that 1,000 lbs. of air is a percentage of pollutants. So you see that for a Breatharian the air is so deadly that we have to take something not to increase energy but to decrease the sensitivity to the air. We take food as you would take a drug or a medicine -- to reduce the sensitivity."
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“Jasmuheen” on getting into the Madonna Zone ~

According to our research at the Self Empowerment Academy, all war and violence comes from a deep hunger for a source of nourishment that will allow us to all feel fulfilled. I have discovered that the nourishment that we all seek, is the Madonna Frequency Field By utilizing our will, our intention, specific programming codes plus a powerful day-to-day lifestyle that keeps us tuned and in the Madonna Zone, we can unify and achieve great things. The time is now!
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Sylvia Browne tells us what tigers are for ~

“Animal totems, like the tiger, come from the Other Side to protect us while we are away from home”
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Walk The Line said:
"Michigan State is pounding Notre Dame and they took their foot off the accelerator. They mis-managed the clock, AGAIN! They didn't use their timeouts right, AGAIN! And they allowed an opponent to get into halftime and make adjustments, AGAIN!" - Mike Valenti after Michigan State's epic 2006 collapse against Notre Dame (This quote comes from the single greatest sports rant I have ever heard, which can be found here: http://cfbmedia.com/forum/index.php/topic,60679.0.html)

"Note to John L. Smith: learn the effen rules and understand that your timeouts are not like cell phone minutes! THEY DON'T CARRY OVER!" - Mike Valenti (same rant)
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:eye-poppi

That was amazing!

Just, Wow!
 
Jean Shepherd
Just wave. Or smile. Just be yourself.

Keep your knees loose.

Okay, gang are you ready to play radio? Are you ready to shuffle off the mortal coil of mediocrity? I am if you are.

In God We Trust: All Others Pay Cash.

Excelsior, you fatheads!
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Sigh. Only the Good die young. :sad:
 
"If a child is taught...that it's all right if you misspell a word occasionally, or don't always punctuate correctly, then you are teaching that child that small mistakes are okay, as long as people know pretty much what is meant. I feel this is a dangerous attitude to foster in a highly technological society, because it encourages people to think, 'Well, after all, the readout is only a little bit over into the red zone. Maybe it will return to normal while I'm trying to remember which way to adjust the control. Let's see, now, was that to the left or to the right...?'" - William Tuning, Fuzzy Bones
 
Beady said:
If we're allowed to cite ourselves, I like Beady's 3rd Law of Social Harmonics: "Before you begin, pee."

I defy you to describe a situation in which it doesn't apply.
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Performing in a German watersports fetish movie?

ETA: Darn it! That's what I get for not reading more carefully...
 
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Hey Melchie! Still worshipping God? Last time I heard, he was worshipping me!
(Lord Flashheart from Blackadder 2)
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Sgt. Benton: What do we do now?
2nd Doctor: Keep it confused. Feed it with useless information. I wonder if I have a television set handy...
(The Three Doctors)
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Pickles[holding uncooked lobster]: Okay, hold on now. So you're telling me that you put these little guys in boiling water and they shriek and they turn red and they die?
Clerk: Yes sir.
Pickles: That is the most metal thing I've ever heard in my whole life. High five!

Pickles The Drummer[to the chef being kept alive by a mass of tubes and machines]: By the power of all that is evil, I command you to awaken and MAKE ME A SANDWICH!
(Metalocslypse, "the Curse Of Dethklok")
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Dr. Venture: Why is it every time I need to get somewhere, we get waylaid by jackassery?
( The Venture Bros.)
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Father Ted: I'm not a fascist. I'm a priest. Fascists dress up in black and tell people what to do. Whereas priests...
...More drink!

Father Dougal: God, I've heard about those cults Ted. People dressing up in black and saying Our Lord's going to come back and save us all.
Father Ted: No, Dougal, that's us. That's Catholicism.
Dougal: Oh right.

Father Dougal: Sorry Ted. I was concentrating too hard on looking holy.
(Father Ted)
 
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I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier. RufusDogma





Boo
 
"When the going gets wierd. the wierd turn pro"
-Hunter S. Thompson

"The best way to avoid responsibility is to say, 'I've got responsibilities.' "
-Richard Bach

"The road to Hell is paved with good intentions... and littered with crumpled pages of letters I always meant to write."
-I, The Procrastinator
 
SPOCK - "I'm not sure where I am Captain"
KIRK - "You're a disembodied brain in a box"
SPOCK - "Fascinating"..
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"If you can't annoy somebody, there is little point in writing" - Sir Kingsley Amis

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"If you hang with losers, you become a loser" - Donald Trump

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"If there's anything worse than being talked about, it's not being talked about" - Oscar Wilde

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STEVE McQUEEN in 'The War Lover' - "I thought about becoming a priest once"
PRIEST - "Oh, you considered taking holy orders my son?"
McQUEEN - "I dunno about taking no orders but I wouldn't have minded being a priest"

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"Well that's our glitch for the mission over" - Astronaut Lovell referring to slightly premature (but non-serious) shutdown of an engine after liftoff in Apollo 13

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In the first place, divest yourself of all bias in favor of novelty & singularity of opinion. Indulge them in any other subject rather than that of religion. It is too important, and the consequences of error may be too serious. On the other hand, shake off all the fears & servile prejudices, under which weak minds are servilely crouched. Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call to her tribunal every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a god; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear. - Thomas Jefferson
 
"There are two ways of spreading light: To be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." (Edith Wharton)

"Et des boyoux du dernier pretre
Serrons le cou du dernier roi."
And with the bowels of the last priest let us strangle the last king.
(Denis Diderot 1713-1784) :D
 
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