Nibiruan Council Galactic Federation

[Miss Whiplash]

This was my Dim Bulb of the week.

I still have no idea what this woman is talking about. Obviously this is another UFO cult, seperating fools from money. I think the woman watched Star Trek and Battlestar Galactica on time too many.

http://www.nibiruancouncil.com/

 

[TriangleMan]

That website is one of my crank-favourites. Years ago we narrowly escaped Planet X by pushing our planet into the 9th dimension by consiousness-shifting (or something like that). Or was it when we managed to project a global shield of peace and harmony through some kind of ley-line network centered on the Great Pyramids? I get my shifts confused sometimes.

Before people click on the link here's my standard disclaimer for it:

Warning! Realizing that some people give this woman money may cause depression and apathy.

 

[CLD]

Nibiruan Scam

This one really gave me a laugh:

Guide Communication Workshop - By Phone -
Learn to communicate with your Guides. It’s easier than you think!

Oh, and this was scary:

The Liver/Colon Cleanse Ingredients - Clear your liver and jump start your emotional clearing and DNA Recoding. Ortho Phos Drops $12, Cleansing Laxative tabs $9.50, and The Turkey Rhubarb Colon Cleanse to prepare the colon for the liver cleanse. $26.95

It seems as if a couple of min-wage employees said, "Hey! If Scientology can make bucks off idiots, so can we!", and studied the Scientology formula: weird sc-fi stories, "cleansing", compulsory purchase of books and CDs, etc. I picture them sitting around with old tapes of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA and dreaming up their whole cult in about 1 hour.

 

[fuelair]

This one really gave me a laugh:

Guide Communication Workshop - By Phone -
Learn to communicate with your Guides. It’s easier than you think!

Oh, and this was scary:

The Liver/Colon Cleanse Ingredients - Clear your liver and jump start your emotional clearing and DNA Recoding. Ortho Phos Drops $12, Cleansing Laxative tabs $9.50, and The Turkey Rhubarb Colon Cleanse to prepare the colon for the liver cleanse. $26.95

It seems as if a couple of min-wage employees said, "Hey! If Scientology can make bucks off idiots, so can we!", and studied the Scientology formula: weird sc-fi stories, "cleansing", compulsory purchase of books and CDs, etc. I picture them sitting around with old tapes of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA and dreaming up their whole cult in about 1 hour.

Heck - a bowl of my Cthulhus' Colon Cleanser (Red) or Beelzebubs" Bowel Blaster (Green) will do that clean-up a lot faster and cheaper!! The secret is the combination of chili peppers - especially the 2 cups of Habanero! A thorough scouring guaranteed!

 

[RenaissanceBiker]

I just try to eat enough fiber.

 

[Pipirr]

"Turkey Rhubarb Colon Cleanse"

That´s hysterical! I presume the turkey is trained to eat rhubarb, and that´s how you get it to go in your colon.

 

[c4ts]

That website is one of my crank-favourites. Years ago we narrowly escaped Planet X by pushing our planet into the 9th dimension by consiousness-shifting (or something like that).

Now if we did that you'd have Yog Sogoth all over you by now.

 

[pchams]

$219 to recode your DNA!!

Cheap by anybody's standards.

 

[brettDbass]

What? It's not true???

Guess I'd better start dismantling my 5-dimensional Ark/Submarine.

 

[Miss Whiplash]

I happened upon the Nibiruan site when looking for Orbs by Beans . Please, these two groups can't be connected!

 

[Zygar]

$219 to recode your DNA!!

Cheap by anybody's standards.

Now if we can only get them to make a DNA recoder that will make me taller, give me rock hard abs, and grow my hair back.

 

[fuelair]

"Turkey Rhubarb Colon Cleanse"

That´s hysterical! I presume the turkey is trained to eat rhubarb, and that´s how you get it to go in your colon.

http://www.motherearthherbs.com/rhubarb.html Turkey Rhubarb is real.

Weird.


But real.

I guess it's ok for an arserinse tho'.