Bumper sticker. . .(shudder)

[Huntster]

If I didn't care what my co-workers thought of me, I'd have a bumper sticker that would read, "Your God's a D*ck".

I don't have to care what my coworkers think of me. We've all been working together for up to 30 years. We've spent more time with each other than we have our own siblings. Those who are "new" are among us in spirit, because their spouses are in theater.

We're like brothers/sisters. Regardless what we think of each other, we take care of each other.

If you showed up here with a bumper sticker like that, you'd get your ass whipped.

Now, in contrast, if it read "My God's a D*ck", you might be a hit.

 

[Meffy]

So the answer to "WWJD?" is "whip the asses of people whose message he doesn't want to hear"? I'd been wondering about that. Infinite love works in mysterious ways. It's true!

 

[Dr Adequate]

Atheists aren't perfect. But at least they don't think they're "forgiven".

 

[DJ Hexadecibel]

So let me get this straight: "Eternal damnation awaits those who question God's infinite love. That's the message, right, that we're brought with? 'BELIEVE OR DIE!' 'Thank you, Forgiving Lord, for all those options!'"
-Bill Hicks


EDIT: It's True!

 

[Temporal Renegade]

Well, since we're making suggestions, here's a few of my faves:

Nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Jesus!

I don't need a new religion. I haven't used up the Old one.

Real Men love Jesus. He looks fantastic in a miniskirt!

He's YOUR God. They're YOUR rules. YOU burn in Hell!

SO MANY CHRISTIANS -- SO FEW LIONS

I found Jesus. He was in my trunk when I got back from Tijuana.

 

[Dustin Kesselberg]

The sticker "intelligent design is stupid" IS stupid.


I like the one that says "intelligunt desine".

 

[Kopji]

DOG LIVES!
Man are we atheists messed up.

 

[Kopji]

WW_D?
I'd like to buy a vowel

 

[DJ Hexadecibel]

HAHAHAHA! "I'd like to buy a vowel. .. " never saw that one. That's most clever!

 

[kurious_kathy]

Atheists aren't perfect. But at least they don't think they're "forgiven".

And what exactly is so wrong with believing in God's forgiveness of sin? Wev'e all siined, we've been born into this fallen world full of it! I just pray God keeps me drawing closer to Him now each day so I never fall into the trap of sin ruining and controlling my life. A repentive heart is a new beginning. This is a good thing and represents one being,"Born Again."
John 3:3....Jesus answered and said to him, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God."

Unless youv'e had this spirtual awakening you can not see how truely great our God is! Receiving Jesus as your Lord and Saviour really wakes us up.

I'm gona make a new bumper sticker that you guys have truely inspired me to do...."Christianity Isn't For Wimps!"

 

[Dr Adequate]

And what exactly is so wrong with believing in God's forgiveness of sin?

The notion that you can be forgiven by your imaginary friend for injuries inflicted on real people.

Unless youv'e had this spirtual awakening you can not see how truely great our God is! Receiving Jesus as your Lord and Saviour really wakes us up.

I am an ex-Christian. I do know what you're talking about. Sadly, it isn't true.

 

[Dr Adequate]

The notion that you can be forgiven by your imaginary friend for injuries inflicted on real people.

Here's a prime example:

What's the difference in your opinion between being humanistic in your thinking or Christian in your thinking? To me one means trying to be more of a people pleaser. The other a God pleaser.

Given a choice between being pleasant to the actual, real people around you, you convince yourself that your behavior is pleasing to your imaginary friend, and so that makes it all right.

 

[supercorgi]

I am an ex-Christian. I do know what you're talking about. Sadly, it isn't true.

As many times as we've repeated it, that's the fact that KK is too dim to understand. The people replying to her are almost all ex-Christians or current Christians. But we're not (or were'nt) her flavor of bible-thumping, brainwashed Christians so our opinions don't matter.

 

[Anacoluthon64]

And what exactly is so wrong with believing in God's forgiveness of sin?

Convoluted.
The answer depends on one's definitions of "wrong," "god," "forgiveness" and "sin." Defining each as a convenient fiction provides an answer, but not one I think we'll agree on.

Wev'e all siined, we've been born into this fallen world full of it!

Facile.
So we "sinned," one presumes, as foetuses. By osmosis, perhaps, or proxy? And wouldn't it be specious of us to acknowledge "sins" we can't even remember?

I just pray God keeps me drawing closer to Him now each day so I never fall into the trap of sin ruining and controlling my life.

Subjective.
To do so is your prerogative. But how do you know that you're not being misled, either by yourself or by subtle misdirection employed by the forces of evil?

A repentive heart is a new beginning.

Occasionally.
Sometimes a bunch of flowers, a box of chocolates and dining out accomplish the same or more.

This is a good thing and represents one being,"Born Again."

Debatable.
What are the miscarriage and crib death rates for these rebirths?

John 3:3....Jesus answered and said to him, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God."

Outdated.
Anacoluthon64 1:1 ... JREF answered and said, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one examines the precepts he cannot see his being deluded."

Unless youv'e had this spirtual awakening you can not see how truely great our God is!

Agreed.
The true size of god is evident through such means. A pair of rose-tinted glasses and a terminally supercilious attitude, however, invert the vision.

Receiving Jesus as your Lord and Saviour really wakes us up.

Unproven.
However, if you are right then Marx was wrong: religion is the amphetamine, not the opiate of the people.

I'm gona make a new bumper sticker that you guys have truely inspired me to do...."Christianity Isn't For Wimps!"

Oxymoronic.
Wimps generally have an overly acute sense of self-preservation, so perhaps it would be more accurate to change the "Isn't" to "Is."

'Luthon64

 

[Cheesejoff]

"All bumper stickers are lies"

That should confuse them.

 

[DJ Hexadecibel]

"All bumper stickers are lies"

That should confuse them.

Or how about "This Bumper Sticker Isn't True"

 

[Meffy]

Okay, you'd need a long bumper but the thought's what counts.

Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: Answer on other side of sticker.

 

[DJ Hexadecibel]

Nah, I think that'd fit, Meffy. You could shorten the answer by saying "Turn Sticker Over" instead?

 

[Darat]

Nah, I think that'd fit, Meffy. You could shorten the answer by saying "Turn Sticker Over" instead?

Okay, you'd need a long bumper but the thought's what counts.

Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: Answer on other side of sticker.

Or

Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: P.T.O

Or

Free IQ Test!
P.T.O.

 

[Dr Adequate]

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

“You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried you.”

So I said, “Lord, during the times when, as you claim, you were carrying me, why did it feel like there was an enormous weight on my shoulders?”

And he went away to think of another metaphor.