When does a baby recieve it's soul?

Would more labor pain = more soul? I was in considerable pain with labors #1 & 3 (#2 went so fast he was almost born in the car on the way to the hospital). Will son #1 or 3 be able to overcome their painful whiteness and replace James Brown as the King of Soul?
 
Lisa Simpson said:
Would more labor pain = more soul? I was in considerable pain with labors #1 & 3 (#2 went so fast he was almost born in the car on the way to the hospital). Will son #1 or 3 be able to overcome their painful whiteness and replace James Brown as the King of Soul?
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In my completely useless opinion, every hour of labour gives the child an extra unit of soul, with a default of one unit. So being in labour for 12 hours would make your kid 12 times more soul-y than the average kid. The only downside I can think of regarding that souly-ness is having to hear on numerous occasions during your life how mommy spent 12 hours in hell trying to squeeze your melon-sized head out, usually whenever she's mad at you.

As far as my mom is concerned, compared to once I was born, the few hours of labour were the easy part, or so she says.
 
Curnir said:
True. But then again I can't prove that there 'isn't' a purple kangaroo jumping around in the forrests of north east Minnesota either.
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Touche'! However, the existence or lack thereof, of a purple kangaroo jumping around in the forests of north east Minnesota, is unlikely to have any bearing on whether or not you will spend eternity in some other dimension once your corporeal component has ceased to function. At least, not according to any of the major religions with which I am familiar. Perhaps we should sacrifice some virgins to this JPK, just to be on the safe side. :p
 
exarch said:
Which would also lead one to ponder: since they were technically born twice, do they have two souls as well?
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Here's an idea: since they don't need two souls, they can sell the extra one to the Devil. Easy money.
 
exarch said:
In my completely useless opinion, every hour of labour gives the child an extra unit of soul, with a default of one unit. So being in labour for 12 hours would make your kid 12 times more soul-y than the average kid. The only downside I can think of regarding that souly-ness is having to hear on numerous occasions during your life how mommy spent 12 hours in hell trying to squeeze your melon-sized head out, usually whenever she's mad at you.

As far as my mom is concerned, compared to once I was born, the few hours of labour were the easy part, or so she says.
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I pity Ray Charles' mother... ;)
 
Powa said:
Here's an idea: since they don't need two souls, they can sell the extra one to the Devil. Easy money.
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Sorry, eBay doesn't allow this any longer.

You know how people give us skeptics crap for laughing uproariously about this sort of thing? Well, tough noogie. It's absolutely hysterical!

~~ Paul
 
exarch said:
In my completely useless opinion, every hour of labour gives the child an extra unit of soul, with a default of one unit. So being in labour for 12 hours would make your kid 12 times more soul-y than the average kid. The only downside I can think of regarding that souly-ness is having to hear on numerous occasions during your life how mommy spent 12 hours in hell trying to squeeze your melon-sized head out, usually whenever she's mad at you.

As far as my mom is concerned, compared to once I was born, the few hours of labour were the easy part, or so she says.
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Cool. My son, known here as Whyatica, took 19 long, long hours to be born. Damn, but he's soulful.

Oww! I feel good!
 
My sister was in labour for a ridiculous number of hours with her second kid, she was in hospital something like 36 hours before they dragged him out (none of which she remembers), and I can assure you that despite the marathon birth session the evil little sod has no apparent soul.
 
Dcdrac said:
I have seen a living coelacanth so I know they exist, i have never seen a soul and have not seen any evidence for one, so it is clear until somone presents clear and incontrovertible proof for such a thing it does not exist.
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Did black swans exist prior to being discovered?
 
Godmode said:
I had a conversation...I'd like your thoughts on it (this is condensed, but the major points are here)

Her: cloning is wrong, because it's wrong to create a baby without a soul
Me: Why wouldn't a clone have a soul?
Her: A baby gets a soul when it's born, that is part of the birthpains mothers feel
Me:So, babies not born naturally wouldn't have a soul?
Her: Exactly
Me: What about if it's born by cesarean?
Her: Um, yeah, I'm not sure about that
Me: But you are sure that the majority of time a baby is in the womb it is souless?
Her: Yes
Me: So abortion is ok then?
Her: Uh, no, that's murder
Me: Would killing a clone be murder?
Her: I'm not sure
Me: I think maybe you need to reconsider your thoughts.
Her: I don't know why you're being so difficult, everyone knows deep inside that it's wrong to play god, they just don't admit it.
Me: I don't think it's possable to "play god" because I don't think that really means anything.
Her: Are you telling me honestly you don't believe in god?
Me: Yes, that's what I'm telling you
Her: I don't believe you
Me: Well there it is.
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I had a very similar discussion recently, actually.

It went like this:

Her: cloning is wrong, because it's wrong to create a baby without a soul
Me: ...
Me: *hits plonker on the head with a frying pan, repeatedly*
 
Please, not this argument. I'm not obliged to believe in everything for which there is no evidence one way or the other, just in order to be open-minded. I'm only obliged to change my mind when the evidence appears.

~~ Paul
 
Good morning.
Oolon Colluphid said:
Perhaps we should sacrifice some virgins to this JPK, just to be on the safe side. :p
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Hey thanks for the offer, but no need for you to do the scarificing. Just round them up and send them to me. I'll take care of the rest. :)
JPK
 
JPK said:
Good morning.

Hey thanks for the offer, but no need for you to do the scarificing. Just round them up and send them to me. I'll take care of the rest. :)
JPK
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OK, but you'll just have to take my word for it that they're still virgins when they arrive! :D Of course, before the whole process can begin, you will have to prove to my satisfaction that you are in fact a 'Jumping Purple Kangaroo'.
 
I was a preemie, caesarian too. Not only does that screw up my astrological readings, but it means I don't have a soul. I'm sure my ex wife would agree.

Now comes the next question. Since I have no soul, I have no soul to lose, right? No soul to fry in hell, right? Woo hoo! I am the lizard king. I can do anything!
 
Oolon Colluphid said:
OK, but you'll just have to take my word for it that they're still virgins when they arrive! :D Of course, before the whole process can begin, you will have to prove to my satisfaction that you are in fact a 'Jumping Purple Kangaroo'.
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Why is there always a catch to offers like this.
JPK
 
When does a baby receive its soul?
According to my grandmother, at age 40.
 
Really ?

Oolon Colluphid said:
OK, but you'll just have to take my word for it that they're still virgins when they arrive! :D Of course, before the whole process can begin, you will have to prove to my satisfaction that you are in fact a 'Jumping Purple Kangaroo'.
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I am off to go buy a kangaroo costume, and a few liter of purple colorant...
 
An uncle of mine had a habit of painitng his sheep pink in winter it was quite a sight, at least it was real unlike the book of genesis and the rest of the rubbish that is the bible.
 
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