Butter!
Rough Around the Edges
Discussed/discussing stuff with my former squeeze who later came out as trans. (Mentioned in a previous section of this megathread, I'm pretty sure.) Some examples of her views -
She thinks that sports leagues should be redefined based on skills or hormone levels, as opposed to biological sex or gender. I'm not much of a sports follower, so I don't know if that would be a workable solution or not. I have thought that would be a good solution myself, along the way.
She does not agree with self-ID, but she also thinks the legal/medical procedures should be somewhat simplified in order to minimize trauma and humiliation to patients seeking gender confirmation. So, none of that "you must live two years as a woman" stuff, but also no same-day walk-in changes with no discussion whatsoever. Find a happy medium.
Finally, she does not see herself as identical to a female born female, but she does think of herself as a type of female. She's fine with the cis-women trans-women distinction being drawn, especially in medical contexts. She is not okay with being referred to as any type of male or man. She has no problem with cis-women talking about their vaginas, breasts, or other indicators of womanhood by their usual names. She does not personally see her penis as a female penis because she prefers not to think about her penis at all. She is planning bottom surgery. She emphasized that transitioners who choose not to undergo bottom surgery for whatever reason are just as legitimate as those who do.
That's as much as I'm willing to bug her about (though I did suggest she sign up here if she ever wants a calmer debate than one might find on Twitter). The point I'm trying to make is that, even among individual trans people, the debate can vary wildly. This is why we should at least try to assume good faith from each other when discussing this issue. I think people have a tendency to automatically assume bad faith.
ETA - By the way, I am in no way trying to deflect any criticism of my own views or questions by posting this. I am not pulling a "some of my best friends are black" ruse, so please do not think that. I just wanted to note that there's a lot of variation in positions, and I have the benefit of getting another viewpoint from a single trans individual. She only speaks for herself.
She thinks that sports leagues should be redefined based on skills or hormone levels, as opposed to biological sex or gender. I'm not much of a sports follower, so I don't know if that would be a workable solution or not. I have thought that would be a good solution myself, along the way.
She does not agree with self-ID, but she also thinks the legal/medical procedures should be somewhat simplified in order to minimize trauma and humiliation to patients seeking gender confirmation. So, none of that "you must live two years as a woman" stuff, but also no same-day walk-in changes with no discussion whatsoever. Find a happy medium.
Finally, she does not see herself as identical to a female born female, but she does think of herself as a type of female. She's fine with the cis-women trans-women distinction being drawn, especially in medical contexts. She is not okay with being referred to as any type of male or man. She has no problem with cis-women talking about their vaginas, breasts, or other indicators of womanhood by their usual names. She does not personally see her penis as a female penis because she prefers not to think about her penis at all. She is planning bottom surgery. She emphasized that transitioners who choose not to undergo bottom surgery for whatever reason are just as legitimate as those who do.
That's as much as I'm willing to bug her about (though I did suggest she sign up here if she ever wants a calmer debate than one might find on Twitter). The point I'm trying to make is that, even among individual trans people, the debate can vary wildly. This is why we should at least try to assume good faith from each other when discussing this issue. I think people have a tendency to automatically assume bad faith.
ETA - By the way, I am in no way trying to deflect any criticism of my own views or questions by posting this. I am not pulling a "some of my best friends are black" ruse, so please do not think that. I just wanted to note that there's a lot of variation in positions, and I have the benefit of getting another viewpoint from a single trans individual. She only speaks for herself.
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