We have had (still have?) outright self-confessed racists on this forum. I'm not interested in having a conversation with them once it becomes clear that their arguments are based on prejudice and bigotry. I don't need to test my ideas on whether black people are equal to white people. That matter is settled.
That one matter is settled does not mean that other issues directly related to that matter are settled. However, I'm not insisting that you talk with anyone you don't want to, for whatever reason. I am, though, arguing that it is very often a good idea.
That's not the same as saying I'm not interested in talking to someone who disagrees with me on these topics. If someone has something interesting or useful to say on either of these topics and can do it without reference to prejudice and bigotry then great. We have potential for an interesting conversation.
One complication I've seen on this thread, though, is that some positions are equated to bigotry, whether they have been discussed civilly or not.
I'm not interested in banging my head against a brick wall though.
I don't want to insist that you do, I'm merely trying to demonstrate that there can be a benefit.
And I'm not interested in trying to change the minds of bigots through reason. Others might be. In my experience that's not how change happens. Slave owners weren't persuaded by argument to give up their slaves.
Are you sure about that? Every slave owner? Do we know that? Also, such a decision need not be made merely on the influence of one identifiable factor. Discussion and argument need not even be the primary factor in such a decision, but could still be valuable if it played even a small but still necessary role.
I also find the whole concept of civility deeply problematic at times.
I'm only arguing for civility during a discussion in which both sides have agreed to talk with each other about an issue they disagree about.
Politely saying something awful is not civil. And I think we get those two things confused at times.
I agree that there is a distinction to be made there. But, as I said above, one could reasonably say that arguing for some other medical insurance system other than what one thinks is the best is awful because adopting the inferior one will truly mean the death of many people, and sometimes a horrible death with much suffering. I don't see a way around having to engage with people even if they hold an awful position: how else can it work - especially in a democracy in which they have a right to hold their position, and vote accordingly?
It's something that has been used in the past to keep minorities down - painting their righteous anger as incivility.
There is a place for civility and there is a place for anger, too.
So I'm always cautious of demands to respect positions which are inherently disrespectful to others.
I'm promoting for respecting the *person* enough to have a discussion with them - if you want to have a discussion. That's different from respecting their position.