There is no evidence that this is happening in any scale to seriously consider curtailing the rights and dignity of trans women. I have a lot of trouble believing this tiny wedge issue is really the source of reluctance shown here to treating trans people as valid human beings.
I love sentences like this. "treating trans people as valid human beings."
That's great.
Trans women are indeed valid human beings. Every part of them is valid, including their penises. You could even say that when a woman does not want to take off her clothes in the presence of said penis, the woman is actually validating them even more, by noting the actual existence of their very real bodies.
Of course, all this talk of "validity" is just word games.
When it comes down to it, some people have anxiety about how their body actually is, which is apparently "body dysphoria", and some people have anxiety about being treated a certain way based on their bodies, which is apparently "social dysphoria". Meanwhile, some women have anxiety about taking off their clothes in the presence of male bodied persons. Now we have to decide whose anxiety we want to dismiss.
Dismissing other people's anxiety sometimes all by itself causes unease, so a lot of people find it easier to dismiss that anxiety if they first come up with some explanation for why that anxiety is invalid. The explanation doesn't actually need to be an exercise in reason. All that's necessary is a negative label. Depending on whose anxiety you are trying to dismiss, you can use "pervert" or "bigot", or even "TERF". Whatever helps you dismiss their feelings most easily, pick that one.