Mermaid found in Fresno, CA

William Parcher

Show me the monkey!
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Jul 26, 2005
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It looks like they have a real mermaid in Fresno, California. She turned up wet, mostly naked, and has webbed toes. She's pretty far from the ocean, has a little bit of a moustache, and she doesn't know very much which is probably normal for a mermaid.


Fresno police seek to ID woman found near Table Mountain, says she’s a mermaid

The Fresno Bee said:
The woman was walking in the middle of the street near the intersection of Millterton Road and Brighton Crest Drive, a half-mile southeast of Table Mountain Casino, around 3:15 a.m. Police added that she was wearing only a black sports bra and had wet hair when they found her. She claimed to have been in the water.

The woman said her name was Joanna but mainly answered “I don’t know” to questions from police, though she said she was a mermaid.

Officials say she could be between 16 and 30 years old and either white and or Hispanic. She has brown hair and eyes, is 5-foot-4, weighs 150 pounds and has webbed toes on both feet...


http://www.fresnobee.com/news/local/article142758639.html
 
Maybe they should check with the keeper of the Eddystone Light...
 
Officials say she could be between 16 and 30 years old and either white and or Hispanic.

Wow guys that's some hard core profiling work. "Subject is hatless, I repeat hatless."
 
Back when the Weekly World News was a physical newspaper, they had a column in which a "psychic" answered woo-related questions that had allegedly been submitted by readers. One column had a woman ask why she never saw mermaids any more, when she had seen them all of the time when she was a child. The columnist answered that all of the mermaids had been driven into the deepest parts of the ocean by increasing pollution, so they were rarely seen on the surface.
I guess this mermaid didn't get the memo. Maybe that's what caused her memory loss. :D
 
Wow guys that's some hard core profiling work. "Subject is hatless, I repeat hatless."

Nowadays that sounds a bit strange for sure, but it wasn't always so. I used to help out at a police heritage museum. Going through a bundle of old charge sheets from the 1890s I found several that listed "sometimes wears no hat" as a distinguishing feature.
 
They may have located her agent and handlers. The big downside to an incident like this is that it could make her late for a gig.

On Wednesday afternoon investigators received a tip and contacted a relative who lives outside Fresno County, said Tony Botti of the Sheriff’s Office.

“We have since learned of a possible name and where she lives,” Botti said, even as he did not yet disclose her identity...


http://www.fresnobee.com/news/local/article143005174.html
 
Mermaids wear scallop shell bras, not sports bras.

I'm not female, but I strongly suspect that a scallop shell bra would be damned uncomfortable, what with the shells being hard as rock and with sharp edges; not at all what you would want on a fairly sensitive part of your anatomy.
 
Nowadays that sounds a bit strange for sure, but it wasn't always so. I used to help out at a police heritage museum. Going through a bundle of old charge sheets from the 1890s I found several that listed "sometimes wears no hat" as a distinguishing feature.

If one is to judge by photographs from that era, going without a hat was fairly unusual then.
 

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