VOTE: September, 2007 Stundie Finals

[Gravy]

Greetings! Gravy here, sitting in for Mobyseven. This month's Stundie finals are a bit different. To reduce sources of bias in this very serious voting process, the nominees and nominators will remain anonymous until the winner is announced in a week. Of course you could search to find out who posted these things, but you won't, because you like suspense, right? Please vote by number.

The Nominations

1) Aeronautics 101

The plane was on the north side of the Citgo and pull up over the highway on it's way to the Pentagon.

You can't move a plane.

2) When the inside jobbers tell us how they did it, they'll be screwed!

you're hilarious. it's not up to us in the truth movement to prove that it was an inside job. of course we have a lack of evidence, simply because the government hasn't released sufficient evidence.

3) Slavery, disease, starvation, and being gut-shot by a .58 caliber Minié ball: these things have nothing on what awaits people who speak out about 9/11 being an inside job.

Plus, if you read the current laws the kind of suppression that truthers can reasonably expect would dwarf all the abuses of the civil war era.

4) We all know that a speeding airliner couldn't break a Pentagon window.

For the record, I don't see how a plane travelling 500 MPH could hit the outer wall at that angle (above), and penetrate anything. I would think it would have bounced off the wall, and scattered debris all over the lawn.

5) There are many signs of the use of nuclear weapons. These are not among them.

I was under the impression that nukes may have been used at the WTC because of molten metal in the basement and because of the nanoparticles flying everywhere as well as victims with dripping skin.

6) A nomination in Dutch, with startling new evidence!

9-11 is gepleegd door de Amerikaanse regering, let wel.. er zijn geen overlevenden onder de vliegtuigpassagiers.

Translation:

"9-11 was committed by the American government, notice.. there are no survivors among the plane passengers."

7) Just as all bread is pumpernickel bread...

There was molten metal photographed and taped at the site. Molten metal means.... drumroll... melted steel.

8) If you're going to have strong racial and ethnic prejudices, make sure your reasons are sound.

That is why there is so much intermarriage with Gentiles. There are not enough plastic surgeons to go around and fix all the noses.

9) The evil NWO has developed a weapon so fiendish that its use would go completely unnoticed by everyone!

Then people will find out that guns are powerless against far superior weaponry e.g. neutrino bombs.

10) This hypothesis is nominated because it's too damn obvious.

• A floor in each tower had UPS batteries.
• At least some of these "batteries" had iron leaves instead of lead, and salt water instead of acid.
• These special "UPS batteries" were in fact iron-oxide (rust) generators.
• When the jet hit the tower, a significant portion of the jet's aluminum was powderized.
• The front landing gear of the jet penetrated the rust generators, throwing up a fine spray of iron-oxide and water in the path of the oncoming aluminum powder.
• Naturally-occurring thermite sparks ignited the "improvised thermite".
• The burning thermite, in the presence of water, created a thermite+water explosion. (I call it a phreato-thermatic explosion, at the recommendation of the many eggspurts around here.)

11) I peed in my pants thinking of a likely Cabinet....

I Was Thinking This Morning (early) That Dylan, Could be a U.S. President when 35y.o ...I know I would trust him to be our President. ...even earlier if the law was changed to be President under 35.
The law could be changed.

12) Question: "Do you know the meaning of the words "burden of proof?"
Answer:

It's not something I've ever needed but I know what it is.

13) This truther will need to contact the Psychic Fiends Network for the answer.

What psychical evidence do you have that planes hit the towers?

14) You may not believe who made this statement about the U.S. military.

"It's too bad [the military is] stretched too thin to strike America."

15) Engineers know that what holds a building up has nothing to do with...what holds a building up.

The deformation of columns - even if real as it could be an optical effect, in part or in full - has nothing to do with either the demolition hypothesis or that of the sequential collapse of any kind.

16) This explains both the U.S.-China balance of trade (they use ships) and the lack of evidence of molten steel at the WTC.

Then it wasn't there as they spirited it away to China apparantly, in trucks with GPS trackers onboard.

17) Hey, it's a graphic nomination! Proven: the Pentagon is 10 feet tall.

18) Why are the truthers not risking their lives to protest like the Burmese? Blame the NWO's most effective instrument of repression: the 30-year mortgage.

I couldn't risk going to jail for protesting like this unless I had my house paid off. And that is another 28 years from now.

19) Can a man grow a beard in nine months? The indisputable tonsorial evidence that 9/11 was an inside job.

Saddam's beard before we attacked was not there just a mustache. When we captured him he had a huge beard. Way beyond capabilities of beard growth for the time he was missing.

20) "All we are sayyyy-ing, is give CD a chance!"

Dude, there was a huge crowd of people chanting the WTC 7 countdown. With all those witnesses, what would be the point of constantly repeating the obvious.

 

[Narveson]

Some of these are recognizable without the names. Even to me.

 

[Tbone]

I had to go with the mortgage because financial stability is so much more important than freeing oneself from the evil cabal of the NWO.

 

[YCHTT]

Man thats some funny stuff!

 

[tacodaemon]

Another shipment of steel to China gets underway:

 

[timhau]

19 is fantastic. I wonder what portion of the TM is old enough to shave.

 

[CptColumbo]

#6 sounds like that old trick question about burying survivors.

 

[The Doc]

1,2 and 19 made me laugh. 7, however, made me cringe. I'm going with 1 though, it's just too hilarious.

 

[Slimething]

All of these are stunning. I had to vote for #4 because it is the stupidest. All are stupid but anyone believing that a speeding jetliner would bounce off a building must be reminded to breathe every ten seconds or so.

All I know is that I won't be disappointed whatever the outcome of the poll. I don't know how you guys who man the CT Forum stand it. Hats off!

 

[DarkMagician]

I had to go with 17, since they go into great detail to map an objects size, yet forget about obvious flaws with their methods (e.g. The Pentagon being barely a story high.)

 

[Mobyseven]

I too have gone for numero uno this month!

Fantastic job Gravy, thanks for setting all this up this up. I like the format so much, I'm going to incorporate it into next month's finals as well!

 

[Brainache]

I had to vote for 1. 17 was tempting, but unmovable planes just got the better of me.

 

[timhau]

I'm kind of surprised that 2 has gotten no votes as of now. There's something deeply moving about a bunch of Twoofers waiting for If I Did It by Bush & Cheney.

 

[apathoid]

Bestest Crop of Idiocy Ever......Ever

Is it me, or are tw00fers actually getting dumber? Usually I can narrow it down to 2-3 worthy nominations, but this month, more than half of these are deserving of the prize, and all merit some consideration. I think I have to go with 17 though, as it perfectly illustrates how completely oblivious some of these fools are to the painfully obvious.....

 

[Belz...]

Gotta give it to number 17. Worst. Analysis. Ever.

 

[Horatius]

i was tempted to go with the neutrino bomb, since it encompasses the double-insanity of making up new imaginary weapons with a complete lack of understanding of the physics that would make such a weapon impossible, but ultimately I had to go with #17. You can't really expect everyone to know what a neutrino is, but perspective in photgraphs is so common, it's totally amazing that someone can post such a serious "analysis", and promote it so aggressively, while appearing completely oblivious to its flaws.....What's that bit from Father Ted about the size of the sheep?

 

[Firestone]

It's so sad that there have to be losers in this competition: they all so much deserve a prize!

This time I was chauvinistic: I voted for 6. The Dutch-language deserves it! (or does it?)

 

[Damien Evans]

4.

Big metal tube hits building at 500 mph, of course it's going to bounce off. Of course it is. Whoever came up with that must have got someone else to post it for him, cause there's no way he could find his way around a keyboard.

 

[Cuddles]

I had to go for 17. I was tempted by bouncing planes, but it's hardly original. A ten foot tall, multi-story building, however, is one I haven't heard before.

 

[Dumb All Over]

The one I wanted to vote for isn't on the list. I'm doing a write-in ballot. What better sums up the entire troof movement than the WeAreChange Intelligence Department?

#21 write-in:

More info on the Department of Intelligence comming soon...