Ok, so I met this woman a while back her and I had many things in common and things were going great and eventually the what religion are you question comes up. I told her atheist and she told me I was wrong. I should have seen problems up ahead in our relationship but me being the optimistic one chooses to ignore those problems and continue on with the relationship.
Time goes on, feelings for each other magnify and a positive pregnancy test strip opens the doors to a whole new realm for me. I was so happy and scared at the same time as was she. We decide to get engaged and everything becomes so much better. I was happy very happy. Days pass and emotions become chaotic with her due to her pregnancy and I tell her it is ok I remember who you are before these silly hormones got in the way she smiled and the rest of the day was great.
Last month everything changed. She is now in her 2nd trimester and the military leave I had planned a year ago becomes a reality. I go home to see my family and old friends and I of course offer her a plane ticket to come with me but she couldn't due to her job. We talked and I offered to stay home but she refused because she said I needed to see my family. So I went ahead and saw them. The first week was rough being without her and the 2nd week is when everything went to Hades.
I talked on the phone to her every day and on dec 27th she wanted to discuss about converting me to the Baptist belief the whole getting baptized thing and silly me thought it would be a good idea to be honest with her and tell her I could go ahead and do it but it could never change what I actually think. She blew up and started talking about what religion this child was going to be and I simply said we can bring our child to church but I have full intentions of also teaching our child science and math. She hung up the phone out of anger and I of course called back and asked angrily why she hung up on me. She replied that she needs some time to think and for me to leave her alone so I did for the night.
The next morning I call her and she tells me about this Christian boy she met and how much she wanted me to be like him in the religious aspect. I asked why would you want me to be anyone but me. She replied that she wanted a good Christian husband not just a good husband. I then said that I can only be what I am and maybe what I aspire to be and no part of me aspires to believe in any religion. She started crying and hung up the phone. I tried calling her and she turned her phone off. The next day she calls me and tells me all about this guy Steven and then I asked if she had feelings for him and she said she didn't know by this time I was calling northwest about changing my flight to an earlier date because I wasn't just going to sit there and lose her.
Later that day she calls me and tells me she slept with him! I was speechless and enraged and then she tells me that she cannot be with me because I am not religious and I told her that is just an excuse and a very poor one at that. I asked her what was wrong with me and she said I couldn't be "the one" because I don't believe in God and at this point I didn't even want to come home. So here she is now with Steven having my child and they both are talking about how they don't want me to raise our child and how I should only have a minimal part in our child’s life simply because I am atheist. I don't want that I want to be there for my kid and it is driving me insane.
I just got word that I am being deployed in May until august and I won't even be there for my child’s birth and she is going to fight for full custody. I can't accept that I refuse to not do anything but I don't know where to turn. I am stationed in the Bible belt and my whole god damn world is falling apart. I want to have full custody of my child I want to raise my child and most importantly I want to be a part of my child’s life but right now it all seems so far away I mean our child isn't even born yet but I refuse to submit without a fight.
What do I do?
Time goes on, feelings for each other magnify and a positive pregnancy test strip opens the doors to a whole new realm for me. I was so happy and scared at the same time as was she. We decide to get engaged and everything becomes so much better. I was happy very happy. Days pass and emotions become chaotic with her due to her pregnancy and I tell her it is ok I remember who you are before these silly hormones got in the way she smiled and the rest of the day was great.
Last month everything changed. She is now in her 2nd trimester and the military leave I had planned a year ago becomes a reality. I go home to see my family and old friends and I of course offer her a plane ticket to come with me but she couldn't due to her job. We talked and I offered to stay home but she refused because she said I needed to see my family. So I went ahead and saw them. The first week was rough being without her and the 2nd week is when everything went to Hades.
I talked on the phone to her every day and on dec 27th she wanted to discuss about converting me to the Baptist belief the whole getting baptized thing and silly me thought it would be a good idea to be honest with her and tell her I could go ahead and do it but it could never change what I actually think. She blew up and started talking about what religion this child was going to be and I simply said we can bring our child to church but I have full intentions of also teaching our child science and math. She hung up the phone out of anger and I of course called back and asked angrily why she hung up on me. She replied that she needs some time to think and for me to leave her alone so I did for the night.
The next morning I call her and she tells me about this Christian boy she met and how much she wanted me to be like him in the religious aspect. I asked why would you want me to be anyone but me. She replied that she wanted a good Christian husband not just a good husband. I then said that I can only be what I am and maybe what I aspire to be and no part of me aspires to believe in any religion. She started crying and hung up the phone. I tried calling her and she turned her phone off. The next day she calls me and tells me all about this guy Steven and then I asked if she had feelings for him and she said she didn't know by this time I was calling northwest about changing my flight to an earlier date because I wasn't just going to sit there and lose her.
Later that day she calls me and tells me she slept with him! I was speechless and enraged and then she tells me that she cannot be with me because I am not religious and I told her that is just an excuse and a very poor one at that. I asked her what was wrong with me and she said I couldn't be "the one" because I don't believe in God and at this point I didn't even want to come home. So here she is now with Steven having my child and they both are talking about how they don't want me to raise our child and how I should only have a minimal part in our child’s life simply because I am atheist. I don't want that I want to be there for my kid and it is driving me insane.
I just got word that I am being deployed in May until august and I won't even be there for my child’s birth and she is going to fight for full custody. I can't accept that I refuse to not do anything but I don't know where to turn. I am stationed in the Bible belt and my whole god damn world is falling apart. I want to have full custody of my child I want to raise my child and most importantly I want to be a part of my child’s life but right now it all seems so far away I mean our child isn't even born yet but I refuse to submit without a fight.
What do I do?
