Either their is a God, or there isn't, and the wager assumes a lot about this God should you wager for it, whatever that may mean. Let us assume that the table runs something like this:
Wager for God - God exists: Gain all; God does not exist: status quo
Wager against God - God exists: misery; God does not exist: status quo
Clearly, the wager does not consider the possibility of a completely random and incomprehensible God, yet either a completely random and incomprehensible God exists, or it doesn't, so the chances are 50/50. Let as look at the adjusted chart:
Wager for God - God exists: ???: status quo
Wager against God - God exists: ???; God does not exist: status quo.
Since Pascal even admits that nothing can be completely known about God, it makes no sense that believing in the specific Christian version should have anything to do with what "wagering" is. If it is what God wants, then what if God wants you to disbelieve in his existence because he's beyond logic? What if he wants you to inhale Tang until your lungs turn orange? What if God wants you to train a bunch of monkeys to shoot lazer beams out of a giant model of George Foreman made entirely out of toothpicks? Your chances of success are a whole lot less than 50/50 if you haven't done any of those things!
Based on his arguments, Pascal says to believe is to wager for God. However, adhering to one set of random crap your entire life is going to signifigantly reduce your chances, especially when so many sets already exists. Why not believe an infinite amount of random crap in hopes that one will be right? You've got to cover all your bases! After all, if flipping an infinite number of coins will guarantee at least one will turn up heads, and comitting the gambler's fallacy will have multiple coin flips screwing with your chances of success, why not buy a gigantic cake and hurl it out the car window while shouting "I'm a lizard! Don't kill Leno you can no!" ? After all, belief is doing! Mighty Elzoob's ways are unknown to us, so we must try everything possible and impossible! You might get alphabet soup every day but you never know what the decoder ring is going to look like.
So yeah, go to church and all that. Go to church dressed like Michael Jackson collided with Kaga Takeshi and paint yourself turquoise in case Elzoob likes that color, then drink 20 martinis and have sex with linguini. And don't even actually go, send a body double and have him or her say you've changed your name to "Fackford E. Chimberwozzle LXVII" and you live on the moon. It might look crazy, but the math works out okay. After all, if the church is wrong but the color turquoise is right, you've got your bases covered! And what if the God doesn't like it when you do these things? Do a bunch of other random things and it will all balance out in the end. And if there is no God then status quo, whatever that's supposed to mean. It's simple probability.
What if Elzoob does not exist, but some other God does? Well, if that God happens to be fond of fashion so bad it makes your mortal eyeballs fall out of your skull and burst open with maggots, you've got your bases covered! Or perhaps it's the God Who Favors Long and Silly Names... you get the picture. And if it's the Aztec Snaky God of Human Sacrifice? There's only so much you can do at once, but you can always sacrifice a whole lot of people the next service.
Yes, you can do a great deal of things by following Elzoob's incomprehensible word. Just remember the number 1 rule: you can justify anything if you jump the conclusion that you're right and everyone else is wrong, and ignore other arguments. Now you know the secret to success!
Wager for God - God exists: Gain all; God does not exist: status quo
Wager against God - God exists: misery; God does not exist: status quo
Clearly, the wager does not consider the possibility of a completely random and incomprehensible God, yet either a completely random and incomprehensible God exists, or it doesn't, so the chances are 50/50. Let as look at the adjusted chart:
Wager for God - God exists: ???: status quo
Wager against God - God exists: ???; God does not exist: status quo.
Since Pascal even admits that nothing can be completely known about God, it makes no sense that believing in the specific Christian version should have anything to do with what "wagering" is. If it is what God wants, then what if God wants you to disbelieve in his existence because he's beyond logic? What if he wants you to inhale Tang until your lungs turn orange? What if God wants you to train a bunch of monkeys to shoot lazer beams out of a giant model of George Foreman made entirely out of toothpicks? Your chances of success are a whole lot less than 50/50 if you haven't done any of those things!
Based on his arguments, Pascal says to believe is to wager for God. However, adhering to one set of random crap your entire life is going to signifigantly reduce your chances, especially when so many sets already exists. Why not believe an infinite amount of random crap in hopes that one will be right? You've got to cover all your bases! After all, if flipping an infinite number of coins will guarantee at least one will turn up heads, and comitting the gambler's fallacy will have multiple coin flips screwing with your chances of success, why not buy a gigantic cake and hurl it out the car window while shouting "I'm a lizard! Don't kill Leno you can no!" ? After all, belief is doing! Mighty Elzoob's ways are unknown to us, so we must try everything possible and impossible! You might get alphabet soup every day but you never know what the decoder ring is going to look like.
So yeah, go to church and all that. Go to church dressed like Michael Jackson collided with Kaga Takeshi and paint yourself turquoise in case Elzoob likes that color, then drink 20 martinis and have sex with linguini. And don't even actually go, send a body double and have him or her say you've changed your name to "Fackford E. Chimberwozzle LXVII" and you live on the moon. It might look crazy, but the math works out okay. After all, if the church is wrong but the color turquoise is right, you've got your bases covered! And what if the God doesn't like it when you do these things? Do a bunch of other random things and it will all balance out in the end. And if there is no God then status quo, whatever that's supposed to mean. It's simple probability.
What if Elzoob does not exist, but some other God does? Well, if that God happens to be fond of fashion so bad it makes your mortal eyeballs fall out of your skull and burst open with maggots, you've got your bases covered! Or perhaps it's the God Who Favors Long and Silly Names... you get the picture. And if it's the Aztec Snaky God of Human Sacrifice? There's only so much you can do at once, but you can always sacrifice a whole lot of people the next service.
Yes, you can do a great deal of things by following Elzoob's incomprehensible word. Just remember the number 1 rule: you can justify anything if you jump the conclusion that you're right and everyone else is wrong, and ignore other arguments. Now you know the secret to success!
