Mystery Park - an Obituary

[SwissSkeptic]

Well, technically it’s not an obituary yet, but I’ve been known to be a very impatient person.


Not even three and a half years have passed since its opening, but apparently there's no hope left for Erich von Däniken's Mystery Park: What appears to be the last attempt at remediation has failed according to today's newspapers. The park's employees received their dismissals and the shutdown is scheduled for November this year.

The founder of the park, Erich von Däniken, is known best for selling millions of copies of his books, in which he progresses the controversial hypothesis that astronauts from outer space are responsible for the edification of ancient buildings on Earth. His books might read like a mix between astronomy and archaeology with a large amount of Perry Rhodan-esque Sci-Fi and some fantasy thrown in for good measure, but in no way does this diminish their extraordinary scientific worthlessness.

Observers point out that von Däniken's creative and unorthodox understanding of the word "evidence" is a major factor in his worldwide success, as is exemplified by his hypothesis that a tribe from Mali, called the Dogon, possessed astronomic knowledge about the invisible star Sirius B. I would go even farther than that and argue that this great man has single-handedly elevated the basic approaches of Just Asking Questions and Making Stuff Completely Up to the ranks of an artform.
Of course, the scientific community might still be struggling with his notion that the Cheops pyramid wasn't built by Cheops at all, and some die-hard skeptics still doubt that it really is a light bulb that's depicted in the ancient Egyptian temple of Hathor. Some critics even stoop as low as to note the apparent lack of originality in his theories and imply that he stole his ideas from Science-Fiction novels such as Manfred Langrenus' "Reich im Mond" ("Empire in the Moon"). However, the fact that virtually all of today's professional archaeologists, astronomers, historians and anthropologists disagree with von Däniken only goes to show how groundbreaking his work really is.

Mystery Park was this man's brave attempt to once again kindle the waning public interest in his ingenious ideas and to create a family-friendly place where parents could share their ignorance with their children and indoctrinate them in the finer ways of The Woo. The seven theme worlds of Mystery Park include deep and insightful archaeological studies, such as "Vimanas - Space shuttles for the ancient Indians?" and "MegaStones - a time machine for the high priests?". It's this subtle approach that has earned Mystery Park a name as a bastion of what some people like to refer to as "complete and utter bollocks".

Here’s to you young Mystery Park, passing away to find your well-deserved rest, exhausted from your financial struggle, mortified by the efforts of skeptic miscreants and shattered by the Swiss population's general lack of interest. Fare thee well, Disneyland of Woo.


No really, it’s a pity.

 

[RSLancastr]

Not even three and a half years have passed since its opening, but apparently there's no hope left for Erich von Däniken's Mystery Park

My question is, what do they have against camels? Is there a camel infestation problem in Switzerland?

...mortified by the efforts of skeptic miscreants and shattered by the Swiss population's general lack of interest.

Visiting the park could easily be interpreted as accepting vanDaniken's "theories", and as Erik should have know, the Swiss seldom take sides.

 

[c4ts]

Didn't he fabricate pottery in the 70's or something?

 

[Windom]

I have been in this park this July. Looks like disneyland or so, very fun. I had really good time, lots of laughing and stuff. It's a pity they are gonna close it

 

[fuelair]

Well, technically it’s not an obituary yet, but I’ve been known to be a very impatient person.


Not even three and a half years have passed since its opening, but apparently there's no hope left for Erich von Däniken's Mystery Park: What appears to be the last attempt at remediation has failed according to today's newspapers. The park's employees received their dismissals and the shutdown is scheduled for November this year.

The founder of the park, Erich von Däniken, is known best for selling millions of copies of his books, in which he progresses the controversial hypothesis that astronauts from outer space are responsible for the edification of ancient buildings on Earth. His books might read like a mix between astronomy and archaeology with a large amount of Perry Rhodan-esque Sci-Fi and some fantasy thrown in for good measure, but in no way does this diminish their extraordinary scientific worthlessness.

Observers point out that von Däniken's creative and unorthodox understanding of the word "evidence" is a major factor in his worldwide success, as is exemplified by his hypothesis that a tribe from Mali, called the Dogon, possessed astronomic knowledge about the invisible star Sirius B. I would go even farther than that and argue that this great man has single-handedly elevated the basic approaches of Just Asking Questions and Making Stuff Completely Up to the ranks of an artform.
Of course, the scientific community might still be struggling with his notion that the Cheops pyramid wasn't built by Cheops at all, and some die-hard skeptics still doubt that it really is a light bulb that's depicted in the ancient Egyptian temple of Hathor. Some critics even stoop as low as to note the apparent lack of originality in his theories and imply that he stole his ideas from Science-Fiction novels such as Manfred Langrenus' "Reich im Mond" ("Empire in the Moon"). However, the fact that virtually all of today's professional archaeologists, astronomers, historians and anthropologists disagree with von Däniken only goes to show how groundbreaking his work really is.

Mystery Park was this man's brave attempt to once again kindle the waning public interest in his ingenious ideas and to create a family-friendly place where parents could share their ignorance with their children and indoctrinate them in the finer ways of The Woo. The seven theme worlds of Mystery Park include deep and insightful archaeological studies, such as "Vimanas - Space shuttles for the ancient Indians?" and "MegaStones - a time machine for the high priests?". It's this subtle approach that has earned Mystery Park a name as a bastion of what some people like to refer to as "complete and utter bollocks".

Here’s to you young Mystery Park, passing away to find your well-deserved rest, exhausted from your financial struggle, mortified by the efforts of skeptic miscreants and shattered by the Swiss population's general lack of interest. Fare thee well, Disneyland of Woo.


No really, it’s a pity.

Did he (asked with a sincere and really hopeful expression) lose all his money so he will be bereft and homeless - like his brain and conscience have been for a really long time?

 

[SwissSkeptic]

My question is, what do they have against camels? Is there a camel infestation problem in Switzerland?

It's all part of the entertainment package: Sacrifice A Camel Like the Ancient Egyptians!

Didn't he fabricate pottery in the 70's or something?

(Insert cheap shot about crackpots)
What I know is that his career started when he was a kid and stole money from the Boy Scouts.

I have been in this park this July. Looks like disneyland or so, very fun. I had really good time, lots of laughing and stuff. It's a pity they are gonna close it

Welcome to the forum, Windom! I would be interested to read more about your experience with the Mystery Park. Which parts did you find intriguing? To be honest, I was there twice, and I found it to be mind-numbingly boring.

Did he (asked with a sincere and really hopeful expression) lose all his money so he will be bereft and homeless - like his brain and conscience have been for a really long time?

I'm afraid not. It looks like he's already working on a science fiction TV series.

 

[Windom]

"Welcome to the forum, Windom! I would be interested to read more about your experience with the Mystery Park. Which parts did you find intriguing? To be honest, I was there twice, and I found it to be mind-numbingly boring".


Hi Swiss Skeptic, I used to live in Switzerland for a half a year this year, beautiful country, omg

So, Park can be funny or can be boring or even can be annoying, depends on POV. Things I found funny:

1. It redefines the word "kitsch". I've never seen that before... posters, pictures, announcements, style of talking... Kitsch with capital K.

2. Nazca. Seeing cinema on the floor, feeling like flying over. Impressive. No complaints here.

3. Contact. Here we are - the best parody since "Space Balls". I giggled every time I heard "...too precize too be fiction", "...too exact too be fiction". I mean, the story wasn't exact at all, it was very abstract, you can imagine those devices however you like. But movie - yes, it was exact and precize, alien civilizations and so. But the best part came when they told us that some NASA scientists made models of flying machine and it's landing "aeroport" according to messures from the story, and machine DID FIT into it's landing place! For starters, it would be enough just to look to messures and I could tell if it fits or not. No models are needed. Unfortunately, they at NASA are not competetive enough I guess. No names were given. Another fun part was: they kept telling us "nobody knows where did it happen or when". But: they DIDN'T tell us where the hell did they find this story, what's the dating of it, even in what language is it written? Fun, really. And they call it "exploring Cargo Cults"

4. Megastones side show = circus. The voice in my headphones told that according to our scientific knowledge stonehandge couldn't be built at those times. I stopped for a moment and thought that knowledge about existence of stonehendge clearly shows that it was not even possible to do that, it was done! But maybe logic is obsolete method nowdays and science doesn't use it, don't know. The most funny part was about stones all over the world in straight lines. I bet I could find out some bordellos all over the world in straight lines as well.

5. Maya. Well that wasn't fun at all because I'm very interested in native american culture, so this (sorry for language) **** was too much even for a parody. It was too much even for an absurd. Very Cheap (capital C) story about two kids hanging around pyramid and a guard telling them funny story. Later Danikan comes in and tells that story was made up. Storms, lightnings. The truth is out here. I got sick.

6. Challenge. Another pure science fiction story. Some good quotations: "yes, Einstein was right, it's impossible to travel faster than speed. But what about wurm tunnels?". Omg and I was expecting something like talking about SETI or so, because it was presented as "searching for extra-terrestrial intelligence". I've tried to search for at least for some terrestrial intelligence in that show, but I failed.

7. Megastones laser show and asteroid PSYCHE was very fun again. Mathematically, all data about PSYCHE is hardcoded in Stonehenge. All circles of that megastones represents solar system (even with an Earth's moon and asteroids ring!) up to the Jupiter. Umm... ancient people didn't know about planets further then Jupiter? Or maybe if we promote one circle from the Moon to Mars, we get Solar System up to the Saturn? The truth is out here. It was such a pity I couldn't discuss those matters with author.

I missed several Main Shows, like Vimana and Orient. Overall impression: it is a good park if you are ufomaniac, if you were abused by aliens or if you are just ordinary dumb human looking where to spend your time. It is also good if you are skeptic maniac, interested in all those things - then you can clearly understand all absurdity and have some good moments of laughing.


p.s. something wrong is going on here, I'm not allowed to post because "You cannot use links...". I dont use any however. Ofcourse if you see this, I somehow solved the problem. It try to remove all code, smiles and marks...

 

[Zep]

FYI, a former woo visitor here, the eponymous Winston Wu, was invited to speak at the opening of the park only a few years ago. However that all fell through - the organisers couldn't afford his meagre requests for stuff like food and lodging. Either that, or they realised they would look complete and utter fools to their backers if they went forward with him as a keynote speaker.




Nope, I reckon it really was the high price of Swiss hotels, not the other.

 

[SwissSkeptic]

"Welcome to the forum, Windom! I would be interested to read more about your experience with the Mystery Park. Which parts did you find intriguing? To be honest, I was there twice, and I found it to be mind-numbingly boring".


Hi Swiss Skeptic, I used to live in Switzerland for a half a year this year, beautiful country, omg

So, Park can be funny or can be boring or even can be annoying, depends on POV. Things I found funny:

1. It redefines the word "kitsch". I've never seen that before... posters, pictures, announcements, style of talking... Kitsch with capital K.

2. Nazca. Seeing cinema on the floor, feeling like flying over. Impressive. No complaints here.

3. Contact. Here we are - the best parody since "Space Balls". I giggled every time I heard "...too precize too be fiction", "...too exact too be fiction". I mean, the story wasn't exact at all, it was very abstract, you can imagine those devices however you like. But movie - yes, it was exact and precize, alien civilizations and so. But the best part came when they told us that some NASA scientists made models of flying machine and it's landing "aeroport" according to messures from the story, and machine DID FIT into it's landing place! For starters, it would be enough just to look to messures and I could tell if it fits or not. No models are needed. Unfortunately, they at NASA are not competetive enough I guess. No names were given. Another fun part was: they kept telling us "nobody knows where did it happen or when". But: they DIDN'T tell us where the hell did they find this story, what's the dating of it, even in what language is it written? Fun, really. And they call it "exploring Cargo Cults"

4. Megastones side show = circus. The voice in my headphones told that according to our scientific knowledge stonehandge couldn't be built at those times. I stopped for a moment and thought that knowledge about existence of stonehendge clearly shows that it was not even possible to do that, it was done! But maybe logic is obsolete method nowdays and science doesn't use it, don't know. The most funny part was about stones all over the world in straight lines. I bet I could find out some bordellos all over the world in straight lines as well.

5. Maya. Well that wasn't fun at all because I'm very interested in native american culture, so this (sorry for language) **** was too much even for a parody. It was too much even for an absurd. Very Cheap (capital C) story about two kids hanging around pyramid and a guard telling them funny story. Later Danikan comes in and tells that story was made up. Storms, lightnings. The truth is out here. I got sick.

6. Challenge. Another pure science fiction story. Some good quotations: "yes, Einstein was right, it's impossible to travel faster than speed. But what about wurm tunnels?". Omg and I was expecting something like talking about SETI or so, because it was presented as "searching for extra-terrestrial intelligence". I've tried to search for at least for some terrestrial intelligence in that show, but I failed.

7. Megastones laser show and asteroid PSYCHE was very fun again. Mathematically, all data about PSYCHE is hardcoded in Stonehenge. All circles of that megastones represents solar system (even with an Earth's moon and asteroids ring!) up to the Jupiter. Umm... ancient people didn't know about planets further then Jupiter? Or maybe if we promote one circle from the Moon to Mars, we get Solar System up to the Saturn? The truth is out here. It was such a pity I couldn't discuss those matters with author.

I missed several Main Shows, like Vimana and Orient. Overall impression: it is a good park if you are ufomaniac, if you were abused by aliens or if you are just ordinary dumb human looking where to spend your time. It is also good if you are skeptic maniac, interested in all those things - then you can clearly understand all absurdity and have some good moments of laughing.


p.s. something wrong is going on here, I'm not allowed to post because "You cannot use links...". I dont use any however. Ofcourse if you see this, I somehow solved the problem. It try to remove all code, smiles and marks...

Thank you Windom, I enjoyed reading your post. I have to agree with you, von Däniken's ideas are pure comedy gold. Unfortunatly I went there with a person who was inclined to believe most of his "wisdom" and I spent way too much time debunking the absurdities to really enjoy the comedic aspect of the park. The second time I went there was for the crop circle exhibition, so I didn't pay much attention to the rest. After reading your post I'm thinking of going there again before it closes, just to have a few laughs.

FYI, a former woo visitor here, the eponymous Winston Wu, was invited to speak at the opening of the park only a few years ago. However that all fell through - the organisers couldn't afford his meagre requests for stuff like food and lodging. Either that, or they realised they would look complete and utter fools to their backers if they went forward with him as a keynote speaker.




Nope, I reckon it really was the high price of Swiss hotels, not the other.

Heh. You don't happen to have a link to that story, do you?

As a sidenote, it's interesting how many people still believe the Swiss wealth has anything to do with banks, when it's obvious that the hotel prices are the real cause. If this hotel for example had to close down for a year, the Swiss GNP would decrease by 50.15%.

 

[Windom]

Thank you Windom, I enjoyed reading your post. I have to agree with you, von Däniken's ideas are pure comedy gold. Unfortunatly I went there with a person who was inclined to believe most of his "wisdom" and I spent way too much time debunking the absurdities to really enjoy the comedic aspect of the park.

You're welcome.

Yes, that can be a problem and really is indeed. I've heard somebody called the Park "Cultural Tschernobyl". It spreads misinformation, pseudoscience and so, what I considered potentially dangerous. We are skeptics here anyway so no need to discuss that part.

BTW here are some photos I made in park for those who are interested. Everything's legal, they said it is allowed to take pictures

public.fotki.com/Windom/clownology-park/

 

[SwissSkeptic]

You're welcome.

Yes, that can be a problem and really is indeed. I've heard somebody called the Park "Cultural Tschernobyl". It spreads misinformation, pseudoscience and so, what I considered potentially dangerous. We are skeptics here anyway so no need to discuss that part.

BTW here are some photos I made in park for those who are interested. Everything's legal, they said it is allowed to take pictures

public.fotki.com/Windom/clownology-park/

"Cultural Tschernobyl", huh? I might have to borrow that one every now and then.
Thanks for posting the pics. "Clownology Park", indeed.

Here's the clickable linky for you lazy people:
http://public.fotki.com/Windom/clownology-park/




Man, somehow von Däniken threads were more fun when Kilik was still around.

 

[Windom]

Yes, here it is:

The Mystery Park was labeled a "cultural Chernobyl" by Académie suisse des sciences techniques member Antoine Wasserfallen, cited by the Swiss newspaper Le Temps [1] and other media [2]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mystery_Park

 

[malbui]

As a sidenote, it's interesting how many people still believe the Swiss wealth has anything to do with banks, when it's obvious that the hotel prices are the real cause. If this hotel for example had to close down for a year, the Swiss GNP would decrease by 50.15%.

Hey, don't knock it. I took a perky young lady to that hotel for a weekend years ago and it was worth every centime of the investment, if you know what I mean and I'm sure you do (winks, touches side of nose, makes obscene gesture with both hands).

 

[Beady]

The most funny part was about stones all over the world in straight lines. I bet I could find out some bordellos all over the world in straight lines as well.

Lay lines?

 

[SwissSkeptic]

Update

Not much to add except this article:

Closure of Mystery Park is no enigma

The demise of the Mystery Park in the Bernese Oberland resort of Interlaken, which closes on Sunday, is no enigma but the result of bad decisions, experts say.

They argue that the main reasons for the closure are the static nature of the exhibition, the slow involvement of local tourism and the stock exchange decline between 2001 and 2003.

"Mystery Park needs extraterrestrial saviour" and "Career dreamer Erich von Däniken pulls back" were just two of the sarcastic headlines journalists made in a long series of negative reports.
(snip)

Have I already mentioned that it's a pity?

 

[luchog]

Lay lines?

Now that's the sort of woo I could get into.