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Medical question - cold sores & intercourse

ShowMe

Graduate Poster
ShowMe
Joined
Jul 25, 2001
Messages
1,350
I'll try and keep this as clinical as possible, but this is a serious question.

Like most people I will occasionally get cold sores. My wife really hates this because she enjoys the oral aspect of lovemaking & doesn't want me performing such an act with a cold sore.

Now my question: is there anything that can be transmitted via cold sore / gential contact that couldn't be transmitted from sex? We're in a monogamous relationship and have been so for thirteen years now.

I'm not a medical expert, by any means. We've always figured better safe than sorry....but I wonder, is there really anything to be concerned about?
 
You can get genital herpes on you mouth, and you can get oral herpes on your genitals. But not everybody. Try Googling?
 
ShowMe said:
I'll try and keep this as clinical as possible, but this is a serious question.

Like most people I will occasionally get cold sores. My wife really hates this because she enjoys the oral aspect of lovemaking & doesn't want me performing such an act with a cold sore.

Now my question: is there anything that can be transmitted via cold sore / gential contact that couldn't be transmitted from sex? We're in a monogamous relationship and have been so for thirteen years now.

I'm not a medical expert, by any means. We've always figured better safe than sorry....but I wonder, is there really anything to be concerned about?
Click to expand...

Oh, yes. It's called genital herpes. Mouth to genital contact is quite a common way to transmit herpes. It doesn't just flow through your blood but requires some sort of external contact.

Some people believe in asymptomatic shedding, but I'm skeptical, based on my observations of the behavior of obstetricians, who are more paranoid than anybody but still allow vaginal births after and examination. This is important, because a herpes infection can be life-threatening for an infant. It can be really bad for adults, too, if you get it in your eye. Most of the time, though, it's no big deal.

A big question, though, is why you get oral herpes outbreaks (cold sores). Do you have a comprimised immune system? Most people don't get outbreaks after a few, usually in youth. It's not normal to get cold sores from time to time, even with the herpes simplex virus. Usually, it just goes into hiding for a half century or more and only becomes a problem again when you get really old and are immunosuppressed for that reason.

If I were you, I would go to a doctor. You might have HIV or lupus or some other source of immunodeficiency.
 
ShowMe said:
Like most people I will occasionally get cold sores. My wife really hates this because she enjoys the oral aspect of lovemaking & doesn't want me performing such an act with a cold sore.
[...]
We've always figured better safe than sorry....but I wonder, is there really anything to be concerned about?
Click to expand...
I'll chime in and say that, yes, it is advisable to play it safe. A female friend of mine contracted herpes simplex on her pudenda from her then-boyfriend, who went down on her while he had a cold sore.

Look, I wouldn't worry too much about HIV or lupus or anything that severe, but you might want to look into getting some acyclovir (Zovirax) to suppress that herpes simplex. So yeah, go see a doctor.
 
I get cold sores on my lips. Usually brought on by stress or rapid elevations in body temperature. I have rheumatoid arthritis which plays hooey with my immune system, of course.

When I have a cold sore, I will not even kiss someone on the check and I certainly would not consider oral sex. It is not worth the risk of infecting someone. The cold sores only last a few days.

In addition to having your immune system checked, have your physician prescribe zovirax. I use the pills as a prophylactic during times of stress or if I've had a fever and the ointment at the first tingling sensation. This has cut down on the cold sores from monthly or twice monthly to only once or twice per year.
 
Euromutt said:
A female friend of mine contracted herpes simplex on her pudenda from her then-boyfriend, who went down on her while he had a cold sore.
Click to expand...

I have no joke, but I'd just like to say that I really like the word "pudenda." It's almost as good as "scrofulous." Some might even say better.
 
There is a contraption called a dental dam. Its like a condom for the mouth, the sensation is diminshed, but its better than getting nothing.
 
epepke said:
A big question, though, is why you get oral herpes outbreaks (cold sores). Do you have a comprimised immune system? Most people don't get outbreaks after a few, usually in youth. It's not normal to get cold sores from time to time, even with the herpes simplex virus. Usually, it just goes into hiding for a half century or more and only becomes a problem again when you get really old and are immunosuppressed for that reason.
Click to expand...

Are you sure about this?
 
Er...um...oops

In reading some of the replies here, and iin doing some Internet research, it turns out that I actually meant to say "canker sore" as opposed to "cold sore".

Two very different things, it seems.

As for Google: Yes, I do use it rather extensively. However there are several reasons why I would post a question here. First, because sometimes trying to figure out exactly what to search for can be a pain. There's a lot of information on the Internet and sorting through it can be problematic. Second, to spark discussion. There are other reasons but those will do for now.

I just kind of figured that anything that could be transmitted via blood could be transmitted via semen as well. It seems not.
 
Loon said:
Are you sure about this?
Click to expand...

Yes, pretty sure. Most people who have herpes aren't even aware of it. I haven't had an oral herpes outbreak in 30 years. And I've certainly had more than my share of stress in my life.
 
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