Ok, it's time we did a fair and balance compair and contraction of your stupid ideas.
Item 1: all your countries are dying, or about to be invaded by us. North Korea is a prime example. You got millions starving to death cause they mine uraniyum when they should be growing rice or corn. Then they come and beg us for food and say if we don't there're going to nuke us for it. I say, let them starve. You watch- a year from now, that stupid little nation will be turned to glass (by us).
2: We won Vietnam. We got to kill a million of you, and you only killed like 50 thousand of us (plus or minus), and today there's a MacDonalds on every corner of downtown Hanoi. I'm also wearing a $80 Abercrombie & Fitch short sleeve t-shirt that was made in Vietnam, and I don't see no frigging hammer and sickel on the label, buck-o.
D- Russians imigrants are coming to America by the BUTT load, not the other way around. Why the hell would I want to move there?
C. You didn't only screw up Communism, you had over 10 years of Capitalism by now and you STILL suck! The stores are empty, and instead of potato lines people wait in line for every product imaginable. Toilet paper is a gray market commodity. No joke.
3. Your military is crushed. The navy is rusting in icy harbors, the army is selling off its nukes to terrorists, and the air force can't fly straight at French air shows.
Who's buying Migs? Nobody, because they're only good for crashing and getting shot down. (Shot down by us!)
There's not even a war going on, and you can't send a stupid submarine out on patrol without going and get them all killed in the arctic circle. (We coulda saved the Kursk, you b-st-rds, but "OH NO! WE DON'T NEED NO HELP! It's all good, no REALLY!" ... etc.)
4. We tricked all your rocket scientitst into signing on with NASA's space station. That was dumb. Not to mention you never once made it to the moon, and we took like 6 or 7 journeys there and only had to kill like 3 of our astronaughts in the process.
Oh that reminds me- how's that Russian space shuttle coming? Yeah, the Buran prototype that never flew and was put in a Moscow museum in 1994! Keep me up-to-date on that, will ya? Thanks.
5, We have a god damn MILITARY BASE located on the only puny communist state in the western hemisphere! What's Castro going to do about it? That's right, he's going to die of old age pretty soon without having done nothing about it.
How many military bases have you guys set up on our land? Oh yeah.... ZERO!
6. China is gone all buddy-buddy with us, in case you didn't notice. Their asking us for our advise on how to be a democracy, and how to do more with thier economy than produce thousands of cargo containers full of sh!tty MacDonald's toys... toys that not only go into YOUR Happy Meal, Huzinton, but also into those cute little Vietnamish children's Happy Meals as well. Sucks to be you, but that's the way it is my friend. Let me know if there's something I can do for you, like mail you a Hallmark Card or bake you a plate of holiday sympathy cookies.
I bet there's a 7 and 8, but I'm getting bored with all this. Bottom lines: you lose, we win, our women are prettier and keep their looks longer than yours.
Item 1: all your countries are dying, or about to be invaded by us. North Korea is a prime example. You got millions starving to death cause they mine uraniyum when they should be growing rice or corn. Then they come and beg us for food and say if we don't there're going to nuke us for it. I say, let them starve. You watch- a year from now, that stupid little nation will be turned to glass (by us).
2: We won Vietnam. We got to kill a million of you, and you only killed like 50 thousand of us (plus or minus), and today there's a MacDonalds on every corner of downtown Hanoi. I'm also wearing a $80 Abercrombie & Fitch short sleeve t-shirt that was made in Vietnam, and I don't see no frigging hammer and sickel on the label, buck-o.
D- Russians imigrants are coming to America by the BUTT load, not the other way around. Why the hell would I want to move there?
C. You didn't only screw up Communism, you had over 10 years of Capitalism by now and you STILL suck! The stores are empty, and instead of potato lines people wait in line for every product imaginable. Toilet paper is a gray market commodity. No joke.
3. Your military is crushed. The navy is rusting in icy harbors, the army is selling off its nukes to terrorists, and the air force can't fly straight at French air shows.
Who's buying Migs? Nobody, because they're only good for crashing and getting shot down. (Shot down by us!)
There's not even a war going on, and you can't send a stupid submarine out on patrol without going and get them all killed in the arctic circle. (We coulda saved the Kursk, you b-st-rds, but "OH NO! WE DON'T NEED NO HELP! It's all good, no REALLY!" ... etc.)
4. We tricked all your rocket scientitst into signing on with NASA's space station. That was dumb. Not to mention you never once made it to the moon, and we took like 6 or 7 journeys there and only had to kill like 3 of our astronaughts in the process.
Oh that reminds me- how's that Russian space shuttle coming? Yeah, the Buran prototype that never flew and was put in a Moscow museum in 1994! Keep me up-to-date on that, will ya? Thanks.
5, We have a god damn MILITARY BASE located on the only puny communist state in the western hemisphere! What's Castro going to do about it? That's right, he's going to die of old age pretty soon without having done nothing about it.
How many military bases have you guys set up on our land? Oh yeah.... ZERO!
6. China is gone all buddy-buddy with us, in case you didn't notice. Their asking us for our advise on how to be a democracy, and how to do more with thier economy than produce thousands of cargo containers full of sh!tty MacDonald's toys... toys that not only go into YOUR Happy Meal, Huzinton, but also into those cute little Vietnamish children's Happy Meals as well. Sucks to be you, but that's the way it is my friend. Let me know if there's something I can do for you, like mail you a Hallmark Card or bake you a plate of holiday sympathy cookies.
I bet there's a 7 and 8, but I'm getting bored with all this. Bottom lines: you lose, we win, our women are prettier and keep their looks longer than yours.
