It's got to be a chocolate Jesus

Lisa Simpson

Unregistered
L
Joined
Mar 2, 2004
Messages
21,960
The Chocolate Jesus is making its triumphant return to NYC after Catholics protested and mice nibbled on His chocolately goodness. I think it's kinda creepy looking.

ALeqM5gD1Nv1-Ah-b5xYpAFCtVOQZiW_jA.jpg


http://www.newsday.com/news/local/newyork/am-chocolate1017,0,7355154.story
 
Don't go to church on Sunday
Don't get on my knees to pray
Don't memorize the books of the Bible
I got my own special way
But I know Jesus loves me
Maybe just a little bit more
I fall on my knees every Sunday
At Zerelda Lee's candy store

Well it's got to be a chocolate Jesus
Make me feel good inside
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Keep me satisfied

Well I don't want no Abba Zabba
Don't want no Almond Joy
There ain't nothing better
Suitable for this boy
Well it's the only thing
That can pick me up
Better than a cup of gold
See only a chocolate Jesus
Can satisfy my soul

When the weather gets rough
And its whiskey in the shade
Its best to wrap your savior
Up in cellophane
He flows like the Big Muddy
But thats o.k.
Pour him over ice cream
For a nice parfait

Well its got to be a chocolate Jesus
Good enough for me
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Good enough for me

Well its got to be a chocolate Jesus
Make me feel good inside
Got to be a chocolate Jesus
Keep me satisfied

Tom Waits
 
I don't care if it rains or freezes
long as I got my Chocolate Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car!

He's kinda dark and he's kinda sweet
Wafers and nuts and holes in his feet
Riding on the dashboard of my car!
 
Actually I did propose an idea for a Jesus Christ shaped spray-cheese dispenser. It could even be posed on a cross and everything. I wanted to call it Cheesus Christ.

The idea was you press down on his head, and cheese sprays out of his mouth. I wanted to market it to disgruntled catholics, atheists, australians, and jewish people.

INRM
 
INRM said:
Actually I did propose an idea for a Jesus Christ shaped spray-cheese dispenser. It could even be posed on a cross and everything. I wanted to call it Cheesus Christ.

The idea was you press down on his head, and cheese sprays out of his mouth. I wanted to market it to disgruntled catholics, atheists, australians, and jewish people.

INRM
Click to expand...
Proposed to whom? Thats brilliant - I'd buy it (and I'm gruntled!)!
 
Now, H.R. Giger knows how to put Jesus to good use.


Jesus Slingshot!


Jesus Candelabra!


Jesus Table!

It proved harder than I thought to find images of the objects on the Internet. I had to scan these last two images from my own book now. Just for you :)
 
Heard on right wing talk radio last night - Imagine what would have happened if it had been a chocolate Mohammed. How dare people suggest all religions are equal.

Or something like that. I was too concerned with the eye strain rolling them was likely to induce to remember it verbatim.
 
-Fran- said:
Now, H.R. Giger knows how to put Jesus to good use.

[qimg]http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/imagehosting/thum_1720247199adb676cd.jpg[/qimg]
Jesus Slingshot!

[qimg]http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/imagehosting/thum_1720247199afd93e16.jpg[/qimg]
Jesus Candelabra!

[qimg]http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/imagehosting/thum_1720247199b511b9d1.jpg[/qimg]
Jesus Table!

It proved harder than I thought to find images of the objects on the Internet. I had to scan these last two images from my own book now. Just for you :)
Click to expand...

ETA:
I would consider a chocolate Jesus in very good taste!

ETA again:
I know it's time to go to bed when I mean to edit a post of mine, and instead end up quoting myself *moan*
 
UnrepentantSinner said:
Heard on right wing talk radio last night - Imagine what would have happened if it had been a chocolate Mohammed. How dare people suggest all religions are equal.

Or something like that. I was too concerned with the eye strain rolling them was likely to induce to remember it verbatim.
Click to expand...

Actually, regardless of religious belief, there is some truth to the "chocolate Mohammed" crack. Modern Christians as a group tend not to riot over insults to their faith. See "The Prophet, Cartoons of".
 
Chocolate jesus's confuse me, because of the easter bunny, I guess, and the chocolate eggs. Wouldn't mind a Jesus Pez dispenser.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top Bottom