Is This The Real May Stundie Finals?

Vote for the best Stundie of May

  • 1) Eww, why would people touch each other?

    Votes: 15 16.3%
  • 2) Sometimes things really happen

    Votes: 32 34.8%
  • 3) Your redacting levels are high

    Votes: 4 4.3%
  • 4) Dreams are totally real

    Votes: 18 19.6%
  • 5) I didn't say it was the thing I said it was

    Votes: 18 19.6%
  • 6) CO2 mass extermination

    Votes: 13 14.1%
  • 7) Stop being a repeater and repeat what I tell you

    Votes: 23 25.0%
  • 8) We have no contract, give me money

    Votes: 29 31.5%
  • 9) VOICE TO SKULL

    Votes: 22 23.9%
  • 10) A very friendly dirty wet jump

    Votes: 1 1.1%
  • 11) Bubbling cheese moon

    Votes: 24 26.1%
  • 12) I assume this works wrong, someone help

    Votes: 16 17.4%
  • 13) Star Trek episode trumps physics

    Votes: 32 34.8%
  • 14) I hate like all the science

    Votes: 25 27.2%
  • 15) More aluminum than can exist

    Votes: 45 48.9%
  • 16) Corpse stock shares

    Votes: 5 5.4%
  • 17) How do bones get made?

    Votes: 27 29.3%
  • 18) HAARP tectonic nuclear attack

    Votes: 16 17.4%
  • 19) We must not reveal the anti-gravity wonder machine

    Votes: 16 17.4%
  • 20) Why aren't the women mating with ME!?!

    Votes: 27 29.3%

  • Total voters
    92
  • Poll closed .

Travis

Misanthrope of the Mountains
Joined
Mar 31, 2007
Messages
24,133
It might be!​



Well it seems the Cadillac I recently bought might be a true lemon. As I have no more time to spare worrying about it I finally got the stundies done.​



--(1)--​

I told the bubble family their fear of human contact would warp the minds of their kids.
Why must they always have them with arms around each other? People don't really pose for photos that way.
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--(2)--​

In The-Land-That-Parsimony-Forgot the idea that maybe something actually happened just can't quite sink in.
What's weird is that I haven't found anyone online saying: "I was there. I finished around that time. I didn't hear an explosion or see smoke." I don't understand why not. There were over 27,000 runners.
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--(3)--​

Does the redacting come before or after the e-meter tells them your Thetan levels?
Psyop. About as real as the Cuban missile crisis etc etc etc.. Fear propaganda to lower the consciousness in to a low vibration in order to carry on {redact}ing with us..
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--(4)--​

So I did win a chess championship on top of Mt Everest after being elected The President Of Awesome while my high school nemesis, Mellisa W, was forced to eat pickled eggs! She didn't like pickled eggs.
I have received dozens of emails from others who have 'seen' this crystal pyramid in meditation and dreams, are you saying Dreams don't exist, because there is no science to back it up. I don't need a damn scientist to tell me that. I know it.
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--(5)--​

Ah, two points to Sophistry House. Suck it Gryffindor!
but jones never claimed it was thermite.

he said it was a thermetic reaction
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--(6)--​

Someone saw a National Geographic special on Lake Nyos and thought...."hmmm, what would a super villain do with this idea?"
Workers and the retired in American are not as valuable as the land and property they occupy to the investor. That is why they ramrodded in “Carbon Capture”.

These are coal fired electric power plants at select locations in the USA, that store the deadly CO2 and CO gases deep underground in massive amounts. The excuse it to cut down on green house gases the true purpose is mass murder of millions to clear the land and property for sale/lease to Asia. There will be a total kill zone an a much wider zone that kills people over 50 with heart attacks. This clears the SS and 401k account obligations.

Polk County Florida and Meredosia Illinois are two sites.
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--(7)--​

You are wrong to believe what you were told. Now believe the completely unsubstantiated hogwash I am about to tell you.
No, it wasn't HAARP. It was an old fashioned late spring tornado caused by hot and cold air masses colliding over the cental plains which has been going on forever.
You are acting as a perfect REPEATER.
You are repeating what You have been told to BELIEVE.
Tornados are not caused by hot and cold air fronts....that is what You have been told , and are repeating.

The weather systems are electrical in nature, and HAARP can re-direct opposite spin potentials to cause the weather to create the hot and cold fronts.
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--(8)--​

Dear Person With Money,

I have no contract with you, therefore you have no reason to not give me lots of money. Thank you.
(1) We have no contract with the Department of Human Services and therefore we do not give Consent for you to withhold Family Tax Benefit Part A Supplement.
...
(3) Nor are we required to apply for Exemption or discuss our reasons for objecting to immunisation in order to qualify for the Family Benefit Part A Supplement.
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--(9)--​

COWARD? Don't make me use my VOICE TO SKULL card I just bought through EBAY on you. I'm betting YOU aren't even a LEVEL 15 MAGE yet.
and i'm sure you are aware that YOU ARE NOT A DR. JUDY WOOD who actually has MUCH MORE CREDENTIALS in to show why your STORY is a result of the satellites in orbit that are known as VOICE TO SKULL TECHNOLOGY and make you "THINK" you are "SEEING and HEARING" a plane, much like the GULF WAR where AMERICA used HOLOGRAMS IN THE SKY to make the ISLAMISTS believe they were seeing MUHAMMAD IN THE SKY hence they IMMEDIATE WHITE FLAG SURRENDER OF OVER 70,000 TROOPS..
COWARD? COME TO TORONTO!
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--(10)--​

A bit of advice: don't go for a very friendly dirty wet jump on the first date unless you are prepared to do a full Rusty Venture.
If your trying to appeal to their 'human' senses expecting rational interaction, there is but one hole to enter through and resides in the middle of their face.
This might sound strange but is a fact. The sense of smell, if distasteful, can be at times offensive and usually something people would prefer distancing themselves from as quickly as they can.
Bad breath, body odor, a very friendly dirty wet jump all over you type dog can all shorten the interaction time.
Get too chummy (like you want them to adopt you as their new best friend) and they'll want you gone real fast.
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--(11)--​

I'm guessing there is a reason they were a "stand-in" science teacher.
I also remember impressing a stand-in science teacher in 2nd year high school by positing my alternative theory for the craters on the moon, contrary to the orthodox assumption taught that they were all created by accumulative meteor bombardment. Since we were told that the moon was probably a molten mass thrown off when the Earth was formed (or in tandem with it), why isn't it possible that the moon craters are simply the result of huge bursting bubbles of molten matter that were frozen in situ?

Needless to say, I have not found anything since to convince me otherwise.
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--(12)--​

I started off by misunderstanding some basic terms then got lost down the road of trying to backwards assemble an explanation. Can someone help me?
lt makes me think, if these corporate governments are corporations (l have tested this in many ways so l believe they are) then that means they have shareholders and have a profit motive. So if we pay tax to the corporate govt (Australian Govt) this means that it must be going to shareholders, so how can it go to roads etc? So if our tax isn't funding the infrastructure, then what is??? l think it could be the Cestie Que Vie trust set up in our name where the system use it for a usufructary relationship.
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--(13)--​

Wait, does this also mean Star Trek transporters are real?
Radio signals cannot cross the earth's magnetosphere. Meaning that the so-called trip to the moon is the proverbial "tip-of-the-iceberg" of those shameless multi-billion dollar treasury-sucking fallacies.

The idea that radio signals cannot cross vast fields of ionizing radiation is not new. The idea was broadcast far and wide by way of a Star Trek original series episode where the aliens about to hijack the Enterprise for a trans-barrier journey back to their home planet are asked by Spock why they don't just send a message for their people to come and get them. The alien responds by telling Spock that a radio signal wont get through the barrier.

A Star Trek episode dating back to a period when the deep space lies were in their infancy.

Anyways, anyone with rudimentary knowledge and understanding of electron vacuum tubes can rationalize how the energy flowing through a vacuum is ultimately affected by the electromagnetic disturbances it encounters. A radio signal sent from earth at any frequency or amplitude is guaranteed to be shredded to kingdom come upon entry to the barrier. The same basic principal can be easily observed in the theory of vacuum tube amplification electronics.

Now, this said, how many NASA claims can we dismiss as tribal thievery just based on this idea of hoaxed radio signals?
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--(14)--​

I love it when the ignorant dish out their "reality facts".
Scientists are psychotic lunatics who believe their own illusions that logic and math, observation, experimentation and examination can give the final conclusion to what we are made of, but not of why we exist. They omit 99% of what they don`t understand, and replace the rest with a mathematical formula.
How reliable can simple mathematics be, when we know that any number is not a reality fact. Take PI for instance. It is certainly some kind of a constant number because it applies to all circles and globes, which is the shapes in the universe we see. But what is PI ? It never ends so it is not a "real" fixed number and therefore doesn`t exist. Yet the root and basis of ALL MATHEMATICS are dependent on it`s imaginary existence.

The BIG BANG THEORY, THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING AND THE THEORY OF BOGUSITY were all pulled out of Scientists ********.
They know **** all.
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--(15)--​

Time cube aluminum cares not for how much matter should be able to inhabit any given space.
In 2008, samples around California's Lake Shasta and the Pit River Arm tributary were tested in a State Certified Lab following weeks of fly-overs and chemtrails. The results of the water samples showed 4,610,000 parts per million of aluminum -- 4610 times the maximum contaminant level!
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--(16)--​

This is not fair. Corpses are not fiction!
All things under the title 'Legal' refer to Corporations and the word Corporation comes from the word corpse, hence the words 'Soulless Corporate Fiction".
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--(17)--​

Nope. Scientists just assumed bone fairies can be transported by the sperm into the egg where they will summon calcium from the bone mines of Hyreghell. Then they force slave orcs to make the bones.
I personally dont know how sperm forms into bones and the rest. Do Scientists? I do know that our bodies are basically made up from dust particles. Those dust particles must come from somewhere? surely the sperm does not simply produce them? or does it? does the sperm actually take dust particles from the environment and is this the dust used to form the human body? Do scientists even know exactly how sperm manages to turn into bones that start to grow and become bigger?
How does it happen?
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--(18)--​

Well darn. The only thing that will beat the HAARP tectonic nuclear attack playing card is the Satellite Solar Flare Murder ploy.
Fukushima HAARP tectonic nuclear attack was done by an international racketeering war crimes network within the U.S. Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), Department of Energy (DOE), and BP (British Petroleum) on behalf of City of London bankers.
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--(19)--​

Well of course they faked advanced technology to cover up the more advanced technology. Who doesn't do that?
But everybody can believe what he wants... if you use science you dont have to believe, you can see it was a hoax.

they didn't make it to the moon, they faked it to the Moon.

Personally I think it was just a smokescreen to hide the real spaceprogram using Antigravity technology.
Anti gravity or electrogravity was openly discussed in science literature in the 50's until suddenly all references to it disapeared and ever since the subject is kept under close lid.
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--(20)--​

Now I know putting lots of product in your hair is kind of...icky but I had no idea it lowered your sperm count.
I read a report from the CDC recently stating that nearly 1/8 American children under 12 are diagnosed with congenital psychological disorders like autism, ADHD, bipolarity &c. It's also known that physical problems like diabetes is nearly epidemic today.

But I was wondering: while I'm certain that some of this legalized food poisoning is responsible for part of this; I tend more to believe that these congenital childhood disorders are coming mostly from the fact that most American women are not reproducing with (to put it mildly) the best genetic material.

It seems to me that if women are mating with limp-wristed metrosexuals who barely have a sustainable sperm count, or dysfunctional thugs whose own diet is mostly prison food and narcotics, then it logically follows that the offspring of such unions is going to be defective.

Of course, the femihags don't want anyone to notice this; which makes me automatically suspicious that some of the finger-pointing at Corporate Agriculture may be largely a distraction (though this doesn't mean that HFCS and other chemicals are harmless).
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The esteemed winner from April:

What genetic commonality do Japanese, British, French, Polish, American autistic toddlers have? NONE. NONE. NONE. NONE. NONE.

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Excellent! Poll?

ETA: Most excellent!

#19. I know that it is true because when I was a kid I read Danny Dunn and the Anti-Gravity Paint and then I could never find the book again.
 
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Man, this was difficult. I had to go one more than usual this month. 8 really demonstrates what FMOTL is all about, 9 is hilarious in every possible way, 11 is just so magnificently arrogant, 13 describes how I suspect most CTs get their "facts", 14 paints a wonderful picture of a CT on the brink, and finally, 17 just because it really shows the CT as the lonely basement dweller. Pathetic and beautiful. :D
 
I may be ready to vote after a couple of weeks contemplating the sheer magnitude of the lunacy up above.

Rolfe.
 
Plenty of good ones but I only vote for one per month and this month I had to go with #13.
As much as I love Star Trek the thought of basing my understanding of the galaxy on the adventures of Kirk and Co. just makes me laugh.
 
I nearly voted for all of them, outstanding stupidity. Had to go for the Australian Government ones in the end.
 
A lot of arrogance mixed in with the stupid this month. This'll be a hard one...
 
I voted for a whole load this month, but 13 and 17 are fabulously stupid.

I also voted for a lot, but oddly, both 13 and 17 just missed the cut for me.

I voted for the hyper-dense aluminum, but I think my favorite was 19. The idea that the moon landing was faked to cover up even more advanced technology is just the type of 'logic' that brings me back to the stundies month after month.
 
I vote 7, 13 and 18 because I'm biased towards the Icke forum noms. Some fora the people seem to be trying to hard and don't appear to really believe their own nonsense, but at Delusional Idiots Forum you know they are honest.
 
The results of the water samples showed 4,610,000 parts per million of aluminum -- 4610 times the maximum contaminant level!
Yes, I suppose 1 million parts per million is the maximum containment level, but not for the reason you think.
 
I read the one about the Aluminium and promptly voted for 25 out of the 20 nominees
 
I read the one about the Aluminium and promptly voted for 25 out of the 20 nominees

it's the extra 'i'. Technically Aluminium can't be overstuffed, but when you get over 100% concentration of Aluminum, it bulges out in an extra 'i' and becomes Aluminium.
 
Hard to choose. Oh wait those are Travis's comment to each stundie... :)

I was choosing between 6, 12, and 15, though there were others that seems like candidates.

#6: It is even worse. The massive sequestration of CO2, and CO? (really) must be why the world has seemed to stop warming for the past decade or two. Obviously a plot to depopulate large areas and mess with proponents of global warming.

#12: I don't think the word means quite what you think it means. In any case, the poster also does not understand that shareholders get what is left after the corporation take in revenues and subtracts out its expenses.

I could also imagine that every taxpayer/voter would be a shareholder and, from the looks of things, they're not getting much in the way of dividends (as in tax refunds). A very profit-less operation.

Errr, I could go on and on...

#15: Can I get title to those places? Imagine something with that much aluminum (4.61 kilos of aluminum in a 1 kilo water sample) in it, I'd be rich!

:)
 
I read the entries after a very tiring day. Now I need to lie down and allow my brain to recover, before I start wearing my knickers on my head, sticking pencils up my nose, and intoning "wibble" at intervals.
 
How I've missed the Stundies since I've been gone. So many good ones. My sides are killing me.

#6 - Nobody touch this one, it's the plot of my new graphic novel!
#7 - Psht. Everyone knows tornadoes are caused by magical winged ponies.
#9 - I couldn't help but read this like one of Frank Miller's later works.
#15 - So now we know how Mjolnir was forged.
#17 - This is why we treat bone fractures by injecting fresh sperm into the wound.
#20 - Sigh. Woman-hating, racist, paranoid, contentious, and yet still single.

In the end I voted for #15.
 

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