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"I do mind, yet you do matter"

Kiless

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Apr 22, 2004
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Do we have the obligation to treat others with the utmost respect, despite their differing values, mistakes, poor judgement and (dare I say) ill-considered ideologies?

When is it right to interfere in the affairs of others? Should we educate others to a level commensurate to our own line of reasoning about acceptable standards of behaviour?
 
Kiless said:
Do we have the obligation to treat others with the utmost respect, despite their differing values, mistakes, poor judgement and (dare I say) ill-considered ideologies?

No.


Kiless said:

When is it right to interfere in the affairs of others?

When ever their actions involve me and I do not wish to give consent.

Kiless said:

Should we educate others to a level commensurate to our own line of reasoning about acceptable standards of behaviour?

Adults no, children yes.
 
There is no one answer nor one single template.

Assuming that we ourselves are not blinded to something when this issue arises, then one must consider many factors in determining a response, an attitude, a method.

The other person's temperament, his education, his previous exposure to skeptical thinking, his general intelligence, and his maturity all matter.

The topic itself makes a difference as well as its importance to the individual.

The person's stage in life.

The benefits to be gained should you succeed in changing the person's mind must be weighed against the negatives.

It goes on.

No one has a right to be treated respectfully.

No one has a right to have their opinions, beliefs, conclusions, or viewpoints accepted.

No one has a right to go unchallenged.

But if your goal is something other than self-satisfaction, you must adopt the most difficult course of all in tailoring your response and analyze the situation and do that which is effective instead of emotive.
 
Kiless said:
Do we have the obligation to treat others with the utmost respect, despite their differing values, mistakes, poor judgement and (dare I say) ill-considered ideologies?
Obligation? No. Does it speak more highly of us, and in general allow us to make more of a difference, if we *do* treat others with respect? Usually, IMO.

When is it right to interfere in the affairs of others? Should we educate others to a level commensurate to our own line of reasoning about acceptable standards of behaviour?
We have no choice but to interfere in the affairs of others. That is the nature of the reciprocally deterministic relationship we have with our environment (and those people who help make up our environment). For us to deny the influence we have on others, or to deny the influence they have on us, is folly. So...why not actually pay attention to the effects you have on others, and try to make the world a better place because of your interactions? Remember that your choice *not* to interfere when you could have is just as influential as your choice *to* interfere; either way, that person's life is influenced by what you did do or failed to do. Claiming that only one of those instances is "interference" is dishonest, even if it might make you feel better.

The notion of autonomous humans, acting freely and independently of one another, is fiction. We are interdependent, and when we recognise this and accept our responsibility (no, as said above there is no "obligation" to do this, but I suspect that having an accurate picture of one's world is almost always better than having an inaccurate picture), we give ourselves the tools to make positive change. We see that Donne was right, that "no man is an island..." and we are better for it.
 
Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Mercutio said:
We see that Donne was right, that "no man is an island..." and we are better for it.

Actually, that was his score line.

"Baby, it's late...I'm leaving for the war tomorrow...and no man is an island...."
 
Originally posted by CFLarsen:

"Baby, it's late...I'm leaving for the war tomorrow...and no man is an island...."

I think she'd be a tad skeptical, Clause...



Mercutio: as usual, well said.
 
Kiless said:
When is it right to interfere in the affairs of others?

What Darat said, plus this:

When it jeopardizes the health and lives of people.
 
Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

CFLarsen said:
Actually, that was his score line.

"Baby, it's late...I'm leaving for the war tomorrow...and no man is an island...."
Boy, do you need to read up on your Donne. The man had more score lines than someone with a lot of score lines on a day when he had a particularly high number of score lines.

"...to teach thee, I am naked first, why then
What need's thou have more covering than a man?"
 
People responded! I am so happy! :) I thought this would float off into the ether. Maybe there's something to this interdependent thing....

Mercutio said:
The notion of autonomous humans, acting freely and independently of one another, is fiction. We are interdependent, and when we recognise this and accept our responsibility (no, as said above there is no "obligation" to do this, but I suspect that having an accurate picture of one's world is almost always better than having an inaccurate picture), we give ourselves the tools to make positive change. We see that Donne was right, that "no man is an island..." and we are better for it.

See, that's what I thought - how about the example that was raised in a Paltalk discussion that essentially boiled down to 'people who gain emotional gratification (or more accurately, owned pets, took care of their pets well and gained emotional support from owning pets) from pets are not emotionally mature / are not really behaving in the manner that defines them as being truly human'?

My view was that if you were an owner of a pet and took care of them then you were not only a 'humane' person but that the idea that you could exist with no human interaction at all (autonomous) wasn't really possible in this day and age. That everyone has residual.... impact?... upon themselves from other people and that this is somehow 'carried' with them. But this is starting to go into semantics and I'm digressing...

CFLarsen said:
When it jeopardizes the health and lives of people.

Yes, but what actually defines the 'health' and what is defined by as 'lives'? Argh, bloody language... :p As sceptics / skeptics (ah, language, language...) where do you draw the line? Is it all just personal bugbears that you seize upon and say 'right, homeopathy, it's the last straw, I shall devote my efforts to this' or 'I have had x experiences with hauntings, it shall be my main focus', etc. etc.?

I could mention the practices of a variety of things (and we all know so many.....) and claim that they are challenging several notions of what is 'good health' and what is a 'good life'... but then how does one categorise the severity of these practices.... unless I take Darat's path and say 'does it affect me'? And what if it naturally cannot help influencing me as an interdependent person? Is there ever truly a line? I could look at some of the posts on this board, for example, and say 'they are on the other side of the planet, pah!' and turn off the computer. And yet I choose not to and respond to them in an effort to assuage, even in a small way. And that's only a small example.

Garrette says:
Garrette said:
No one has a right to be treated respectfully.

No one has a right to have their opinions, beliefs, conclusions, or viewpoints accepted.

No one has a right to go unchallenged.

But if your goal is something other than self-satisfaction, you must adopt the most difficult course of all in tailoring your response and analyze the situation and do that which is effective instead of emotive.

In a more personal example:
I could (and in doing so, break my employment contract according to what the very nice people in HR told me in a rather amusing and enlightening conversation), possibly define what is 'good health' and a 'good life' for my students involves not being taught what I consider to be fanciful and fictional notions of a supreme being. I could easily tally up, after investigating with relative ease, the concepts that are being taught to them and come to a decision that I could justify as being perfectly rational. Does this make it right? Certainly I have dealt with more challenging employment situations of a similar sort before with inaction and by not taking action, implied consent that this happens. Why change now (and I think I could answer that with my next case example, anyway)?

This then goes back to the statements that Garrette made and I may then conclude that what I am doing is possibly more emotive, self satisfying and eventually more destructive than effective.... and do I have the right to do this when I am not the parents of the children who let them go to this institution with the full knowledge of what is being taught there?

I could just leave. But then what of those students who said that I was one of the few they felt they didn't feel uncomfortable with, when they did raise questions about their different beliefs in opposition to the mainstream Christianity being espoused (or even burgeoning realisation that perhaps they didn't have to have a belief in any religion)? Am I then helping what I deride by what could be defined as a different form of 'inaction' - by not being there as a sympathetic ear?

With the case of an individual that has raised my concerns in a similar way - where a child has been told by parents that they are cursed with a demon and that they are to refuse any medical attention as it may interfere with their defeat of said demon... again, I have Garrette's overview come to mind, where I cannot move on the issue as I am up against some rather odd cultural beliefs... that I don't respect and that the school also does not accept (and they're not mainstream cultural or religious beliefs, I assure you). We have eventually come to the conclusion that we cannot implicitly support by standing back and doing nothing but 'let' this happen. It's going to result in this student being told to leave our institution as we cannot deal with it the way the parents want to and I'd imagine that it will not be long now before that student is gone.

Darat says 'adults no, children yes' - so do / should I interfere in that case? This student is still classed as a minor in our state. And again, I ponder Garrette's summation and wonder about the benefit / negative ratio. And in that case, I took action. So why in one case and not the other - is the individual somehow more important than the many?

Are there cases where you have found that you stand for one thing but let slide the other because the challenge seems too much? Or does the notion of 'there is no autonomy' somehow help?
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Mercutio said:
Boy, do you need to read up on your Donne. The man had more score lines than someone with a lot of score lines on a day when he had a particularly high number of score lines.

"...to teach thee, I am naked first, why then
What need's thou have more covering than a man?"

..... And that neatly sums up why I couldn't teach Donne to a class with teenage boys in it. Argh.
icon_redface.gif
 
Kiless said:
People responded! I am so happy! :) I thought this would float off into the ether. Maybe there's something to this interdependent thing....
Just remember, in cases like this where multiple people are giving advice...when conflicting advice is given...Mercutio is right.

Are there cases where you have found that you stand for one thing but let slide the other because the challenge seems too much? Or does the notion of 'there is no autonomy' somehow help?
You are falling into the trap of trying to make the world perfect. That certainly is a challenge that will not just seem but be too much. Aim not for making the world perfect, but for making it better than it is. Science is incremental, and works best that way. If we take too many steps at once, and fail, which step was the wrong one? Give yourself permission to go more slowly and be sure of each step.
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Kiless said:
..... And that neatly sums up why I couldn't teach Donne to a class with teenage boys in it. Argh.
icon_redface.gif
Ah, but you can do the world of literature a world of good by simply telling them that you could not teach them Donne for that reason. I think every member of my high school English class read Chaucer's "Miller's Tale" precisely because our teacher forbade it. If she had actually assigned it, she'd be lucky if half the class read it.
 
Mercutio said:
Just remember, in cases like this where multiple people are giving advice...when conflicting advice is given...Mercutio is right.

I can only make one response to that - :p Call it a reinforcement if you wish.

Mercutio said:
You are falling into the trap of trying to make the world perfect. That certainly is a challenge that will not just seem but be too much. Aim not for making the world perfect, but for making it better than it is. Science is incremental, and works best that way. If we take too many steps at once, and fail, which step was the wrong one? Give yourself permission to go more slowly and be sure of each step. [/B]

ARGH!! Why can't I make it perfect?? ARGH ARGH ARGH!!! @*#^%@*&#^%@*&#^%!@(*#&%@(*#&^@(&#^%@*&#%^@&%#!!!!!! :(

And not tomorrow, but NOW! :(

Sorry, not being very serious at the moment.
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Mercutio said:
Ah, but you can do the world of literature a world of good by simply telling them that you could not teach them Donne for that reason. I think every member of my high school English class read Chaucer's "Miller's Tale" precisely because our teacher forbade it. If she had actually assigned it, she'd be lucky if half the class read it.

Ah ha! Last year for my advanced year 10 class, I thought I found the solution to the *^(&^%^@%#^@% 'book report' assignment that everyone had to do.

I brought in pretty much my entire bookcase of fiction book classics. And then threw them into a pile one by one, giving similar summations to this:

" 'Lolita' - banned in 1959. You can't even see the film, guys, it's R-rated. Sorry"
"Daphne du Maurier's 'Rebecca' - mad people in attic, really politically incorrect."
"Mansfield Park. She ends up marrying her cousin."
"Ulysses by James Joyce. Also banned. Back in the 1920s."
"Huckleberry Finn. Banned. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert. Banned. This novel, The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck, has been banned back in 1939 and is still being challenged today.
"Pride and Prejudice. The mission of a young woman is apparently to find a rich husband. Very politically incorrect."
"The Complete Robot. Short stories. The only strong willed female character is pretty much an emotionless robot herself and many people think that women have no business reading science fiction anyway. Add these HG Wells books, this copy of The Hobbit and this copy of Brave New World which also raises questions about sexual morality.
"Oh, and this copy of Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut, features briefly in an 80s film called 'Footloose' where people in a bible-belt town express the opinion that 'this sort of book should be burned' and such beliefs have been expressed in real life too."
"A high school teacher I knew claimed that The Left Hand Of Darkness by Ursula K. LeGuin was just the rantings of a repressed lesbian lunatic and that dubious characters of no specific sexual orientation incited lewd behaviour."
"Chaim Potok. 'My Name is Asher Lev'. The main character spends most of the book in massive conflict about his Jewish background and his desire to be a modern artist. Creates this huge painting that is totally scandalous. Could be considered rather controversial."
"Oh, this copy of The Handmaid's Tale should not be shown to the Reverend of this school."

I then mentioned that the librarians at my high school removed from me the copy of Muriel Spark's "The Prime Of Miss Jean Brodie" because one of them read the back cover as I was trying to take it out. That was added to the pile, natch.

Guess what happened? ;)

(edited to add - got three reports on 'Prime of Miss Jean' alone! Whohoo!!! :D)
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Kiless said:
Guess what happened? ;)
Um....they all tried to do reports on "Letters to Penthouse", on the theory that anything at all that adults did not want them to read was automatically classic literature?
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: "I do mind, yet you do matter"

Mercutio said:
Um....they all tried to do reports on "Letters to Penthouse", on the theory that anything at all that adults did not want them to read was automatically classic literature?

If you ever have the misfortune of seeing me again, I shall force feed you this copy of Awakenings in a most politically incorrect manner.....
 
Back to being serious - what if you are coming across cultural taboos and how much credence do people give to them? I think of many examples where people have committed terrible attrocities in the name of 'they are inferior to our culture'. Where does justification lead us?
 
Justification leads us everywhere and nowhere. Justification is to demontstrate or prove being right. Any time you are truly justifying, you are usually preaching to the choir. You want to define what is right in the next minute or so?

Opression of various races has been justified. Liberation of those same groups has been justified. Any time the word "because" is used, it is probably justification.

I understand your pain and consternation, however, consider this. My good friend is a high school teacher whom I happened to go to high school with. He remembered me getting sent to the office multiple times for throwing reality in my teachers' faces. (The Declaration of Independence was not signed on July 4th, nor was Independence Day intended to be that date, Lois Pasteur developed Pasteurization originally for rich people's wine, not to help the poor peasants with their milk troubles, etc.)

He now throws out the ideas that certain things taught in school might not be truly the case, and if they were interested, he would hold a seperate, after school club/forum. Surprisingly, he meets with about 20 students 2 times a month to discuss such things. It's about as popular as his anime club. I also get to speak to them about once every 6 months, and it's a blast, because there are a number of them who bring up facts and ideas that I've never heard before.

It's helping shape the skeptics and can at least hold back the rage. Just a thought. Don't know how much time you have to do such things, but it's brilliant for me.
 
treble_head said:
It's helping shape the skeptics and can at least hold back the rage. Just a thought. Don't know how much time you have to do such things, but it's brilliant for me.

Thank you, that is helpful! :)
 
Taboos and Traditions

Back to being serious - what if you are coming across cultural taboos and how much credence do people give to them? I think of many examples where people have committed terrible attrocities in the name of 'they are inferior to our culture'. Where does justification lead us?

What if we're coming across cultural and religious traditions -- wife and child beating, child marriage, honor killings, slavery, male and female genital surgery on infants and children, racial and ethnic segregation, banishment, torture, racism, gay bashing, voting rights, housing, property rights, rights to education?

I think of many examples where people have committed terrible atrocities in the name of "this is our way and we must protect it."

Does skepticism apply to broad cultural traditions based on religion or scientifically unsupported beliefs about the superiority or inferiority or place in society of certain classes of people?

Where does justification for or against deeply entrenched cultural tradition lead skeptics?
 

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