Healing with a Porpoise?

Dub

Thinker
D
Joined
Nov 25, 2001
Messages
247
A new 'healing clinic' has just opened in my village; its slogan being the same as this topic's title (minus the question mark). I recently recieved a flyer for this new place through my door. Here's some of the blurb from the flyer:

The clinic is run by Genene Wall, who is a "M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master". She must be good :D Does anyong know what this grandious title acutally means?

Apart from offering standard beauty treatments, such as make-up, manicures etc, the clinic also offers:

PhD waxing - which is apparently the "most hygenic system available". Not really sure what a "PhD wax" is. Does the wax hold a PhD?
Reki - not surprising really given the resident 'master'
And of course dont forget the Reflexology!

I still have no idea where the porpoise comes into the equation :)
 
Maybe it was immortal, until it was caught escorting young gulls across a state lion.
 
Dub said:
The clinic is run by Genene Wall, who is a "M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master". She must be good :D Does anyong know what this grandious title acutally means?

Apart from offering standard beauty treatments, such as make-up, manicures etc, the clinic also offers:

PhD waxing - which is apparently the "most hygenic system available". Not really sure what a "PhD wax" is. Does the wax hold a PhD?
Click to expand...

Here's what reiki.org has to say about cerification:

"Licensing

Anyone who has taken Reiki I&II can take ART/III Master training. This includes those who have studied with other teachers or schools. There are no other requirements. After taking ART/III Master training, you will have the basic requirements necessary to teach all levels of Reiki as an independent Reiki master.

You can begin teaching on your own or you may choose to continue your training and become a Center Licensed Reiki Master/Teacher. Licensing has many benefits. Information about our Licensing program can be found on the current schedule page.
"

Useful info huh? Sorry I even provided it... I will continue to search for what "M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master" means. Wish me luck!
 
Obviously, healing is the porpoise of the clinic.

And M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T is obviously:

Master
Is
Failed
Healer
But
Is
Indiscriminately
Hawking
Hackneyed
Therapies
 
Dub said:
The clinic is run by Genene Wall, who is a "M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master". She must be good :D Does anyong know what this grandious title acutally means?
Click to expand...

You might not believe this... but I discovered it is based on an ancient Chinese cipher. God bless Google, I have found the key.

The solution:
My Incompetence Flows Heedlessly - Building Immodest, Impudent, (yet)Hallowed Half(or less) Truths
 
Write "NO THANKS" on the flyer in big black pen. Then see if it can be made into a good paper plane. Then throw it back in their door one day. I do this to people who hand stuff out in the street - makes then MUCH madder than just binning it in their face.
 
RichardR said:
Obviously, healing is the porpoise of the clinic.

And M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T is obviously:

Master
Is
Failed
Healer
But
Is
Indiscriminately
Hawking
Hackneyed
Therapies
Click to expand...

Doh! You did the same thing... while I was doing mine! Now I feel unoriginal and appear to have copied you - even though I didn't! oh well... :)
 
M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T

I would assume that the final three letters stand for Healing Hands Therapy/Therapist.

Are you sure there are no commas in there, such as M.I.F.H., B.I.I., H.H.T.?
 
WHY ARE WE WORRYING ABOUT THESE PEOPLE! WHO THE ◊◊◊◊ CARES!

IF THEY CANNOT EVEN SPELL THEIR OWN (dubious) QUALIFICATIONS THEN THEY OBVIOUSLY HAVE NONE!
 
"M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master".

Many
Imbeciles
From
Hereabouts
Believe
In
Idiotic
Half-assed
Healing
Trickery
 
Bad joke (on porpoise)

If you weren't posting from Wales I'd have thought this was a Brooklyn thing.

BTW Where in Wales? Is it particularly New-Agey?
 
RSLancastr said:
M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T

I would assume that the final three letters stand for Healing Hands Therapy/Therapist.

Are you sure there are no commas in there, such as M.I.F.H., B.I.I., H.H.T.?
Click to expand...

Nope, no commas. All seperated with full stops.


Dragon said:
If you weren't posting from Wales I'd have thought this was a Brooklyn thing.

BTW Where in Wales? Is it particularly New-Agey?
Click to expand...

Im in Cardiff. Fortunately its not too new-agey; although there are of course a few woo-woos floating round.
 
What is the....porpoise...of all this? :)

I remember vaguely a TV show with dolphins, I think it was with Robin Williams. Supposedly it was to show how gentle creatures dolphins were. While standing in the shallow water, RW got hit by a dolphin's nose pretty hard. :)

Dolphins are highly skilled predators, not at all these cute, benign animals who would never hurt anyone. Remember the clip with the dolphins tossing a seal among them until it died? :eek:

NewAgers have abused and perverted this animal into something it is not.
 
To add to CFLarsen's post.

Large male dolphins also demonstrate their dominance by inserting their penis into the anus of subordinate males.
Maybe that's the sort of service being provided.

What was that the address again?
 
smahon said:
Large male dolphins also demonstrate their dominance by inserting their penis into the anus of subordinate males.
Click to expand...
Just like macacques.
 
Dub said:


...

Im in Cardiff. Fortunately its not too new-agey; although there are of course a few woo-woos floating round.
Click to expand...

Sorry, I meant the village where the clinic is ...
I'm from Abergavenny myself originally and the Border country tends to attract more than its fair share of woo-woos/new agers/middle-class hippies.
 
Dragon said:


Sorry, I meant the village where the clinic is ...
I'm from Abergavenny myself originally and the Border country tends to attract more than its fair share of woo-woos/new agers/middle-class hippies.
Click to expand...

The clinic is also in Cardiff :) The village is in a suburb of Cardiff called Whitchurch.
 
Dub said:

, who is a "M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T Reki Master". She must be good :D Does anyong know what this grandious title acutally means?
Click to expand...


First, I bet the flyer said "Reiki", not "Reki".

Second, I figured out what ""M.I.F.H.B.I.I.H.H.T" means.

Apparently "MIFHB" and "IIHHT" are designations, meaning that person is a member of or graduated from the International Federation of Health & Beauty Therapists and from the International Institute of Health and Holistic Therapies.
 
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