Christian forgiveness

[zakur]

Man used Net to ask stranger to rape wife

MEDINA | A man was sentenced to two years in prison on charges that he used the Internet to solicit a stranger to rape his wife, who fought off the attacker in her home.

Jeffrey Andrews, 41, pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit aggravated burglary and attempted complicity to commit gross sexual imposition.

He was sentenced Friday by Medina County Common Pleas Judge Christopher Collier, who described Andrews’ crime as ‘‘extremely perverse.’’

[...]

Andrews’ wife said she has reconciled with her husband.

‘‘I’m a Christian. I’m a wife and a mother. I know what he’s done is wrong and I forgive him,’’ she said.

I can imagine forgiving people for a great many transgressions. This is not one of them.

 

[Yahweh]

I dont think the forgiveness is too much rooted in her Christianity, instead its just a case of misplaced loyalty...

The guy doesnt deserve forgiveness...

 

[Zep]

This has all the hallmarks of a "battered wife" situation:

* Wife abused horribly, especially sexually.
* Misplaced (and utterly naive) understanding of "Christian forgiveness" o n the part of the victim.
* An obvious desire to stay with the perpetrator, even though there is a history of repression.
* Etc, etc.

I suspect, and I hope I'm sorely mistaken, that violence and repression plays a big part in this household, and that something worse will come of this eventually - he will batter her, or she will shoot him. Either way - very VERY sad, and so avoidable.

 

[MoeFaux]

Wow, if that had all happened on the up and up, it would have been very sexy.

 

[MoeFaux]

Xtian forgivness is such a sad thing. It's harming oneself to "better" someone else. It's just more altruistic bullsh*t. You should forgive someone because they deserve to be forgiven, not because you're guilted into it or someone tells you to.
It's a very sad thing.

 

[zakur]

Also from the article:

Two weeks later, Andrews’ wife found e-mails and other electronic communications between her husband and the suspected attacker. She showed the e-mails to her pastor, and he called police.

This woman is probably the type who reconciles with the husband who arranged for her rape, but will not forgive her pastor who broke up her family by reporting him to the police.

 

[Finella]

Xtian forgivness is such a sad thing. It's harming oneself to "better" someone else. It's just more altruistic bullsh*t. You should forgive someone because they deserve to be forgiven, not because you're guilted into it or someone tells you to.
It's a very sad thing.

I don't think this is true Christian forgiveness. Christian forgiveness makes a better person out of the one who forgives. It does not force the forgiver into reliving the experience again and again, becoming less a person and more and more a victim. Forgiveness is empowering. Forgiveness is healing. Forgiveness can forget, but not this way.

This woman really needs to get out of this situation and forgive herself for being in there in the first place. Then the empowerment and healing will begin.

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