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Baby Jesus Haystacks

jimmygun

Graduate Poster
J
Joined
Apr 4, 2003
Messages
1,589
Just a weird site to visit and wonder about the born again mindset...

http://www.dltk-bible.com/recipes.htm

Example...

Give each child one triangle shaped section of crescent roll. This represents the tomb.
Each child takes one marshmallow which represents the body of Christ.
Dip the marshmallow in the butter and roll in cinnamon and sugar mixture. This represents the oils and spices the body was anointed with upon burial.
Lay the marshmallow on the dough and carefully wrap it around the marshmallow.
Make sure all seams are pinched together well. (Otherwise the marshmallow will "ooze" out of the seams)
Bake according to package directions.
Cool.

Break open the tomb and the body of Christ is no longer there!!
Celebrate God's love!
 
Mmmm... Locusts....


John the Baptist Snack
Contributed by Ron and Laura. Thank-you!

Use Crescent Roll dough and shaped them into "bugs"
Use raisins for eyes, pretzel sticks for antennae and legs.
After baking, brush them with honey and the children enjoy locusts with honey!
 
jimmygun said:
Make sure all seams are pinched together well. (Otherwise the marshmallow will "ooze" out of the seams)
Click to expand...

JIMMY!!! You didn't seal your tomb properly, and now Jesus is oozing out all over the place!!!

Straight to HELL, young man!!!
 
Wow. I remember history class, and all those heresies that arose because people couldn't agree whether Christ was divine, human, a mixture, or both at once without mixing. But I'm relieved to know that someone has a reasonable interpretation of the true nature of Christ:

He's made of marshmallow.

Somehow, all of Christianity just became clearer to me. Plus, I'm totally hungry for smores.
 
Calee said:
Use Crescent Roll dough and shaped them into "bugs"
Use raisins for eyes, pretzel sticks for antennae and legs.
After baking, brush them with honey and the children enjoy locusts with honey!
Click to expand...


HAHAHAHAH

HAHAHAHAHAH

Oh ◊◊◊◊, is that for real?

Someone should tell Ron and Laura that John's vows had him eating "Locus," a plant, not "Locusts," an insect.

HAHAHA

Damn

To be fair, I remember getting "locus" and "locust" confused in Bible School. WHEN I WAS FIVE YEARS OLD. I've known better since then.
 
scribble said:
Someone should tell Ron and Laura that John's vows had him eating "Locus," a plant, not "Locusts," an insect.

HAHAHA

Damn

To be fair, I remember getting "locus" and "locust" confused in Bible School. WHEN I WAS FIVE YEARS OLD. I've known better since then.
Click to expand...

Locust, not locus, is the name of the tree you're thinking of.

At any rate, though, the online Bible lexicons I've consulted indicate that the Greek term is akris, which refers specifically to the insect (whence the taxonomic family designation Acridae). Unless there was some kind of error in the transcribing of the extant manuscripts - as some have alleged - it was definitely the bug, not the plant, that John ate.
 
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