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A new product for smokers

kourama

Thinker
K
Joined
May 23, 2002
Messages
216
I came up with a new product for smokers. It looks exaclty like a cigarette, and it lights the same. The only difference is that it kills you in about 30 seconds.

Of course, the package will contain all the legally required warning labels.

I figure 30 years, or 30 seeconds, what's the diff?

If the government decides that I shouldn't sell such a prodcut, then they'd be forced to explain why regular cigarretes are allowed and not my "Instant Satisfaction (tm)" cigarettes.

I could also get the Catholic corporation involved. They could bless the package or something, and by smoking one of them, you'd be agreeing to a binding contract that commits your soul to the Catholics.

Ah, the possibilities...
 
Its not like Phillip Morris wants smokers to die. Why would cigarette companies want to kill their customers? It's not intentional. If they coudl deliver the same product without the whole cancer side effect than they would.
 
Tricky said:
How did you manage to cram 30 years of "smoking enjoyment" into 30 seconds?
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I can tell someone here has never been to "Flavor Country."
 
kourama said:
I came up with a new product for smokers. It looks exaclty like a cigarette, and it lights the same. The only difference is that it kills you in about 30 seconds.

Of course, the package will contain all the legally required warning labels.

I figure 30 years, or 30 seeconds, what's the diff?

If the government decides that I shouldn't sell such a prodcut, then they'd be forced to explain why regular cigarretes are allowed and not my "Instant Satisfaction (tm)" cigarettes.

I could also get the Catholic corporation involved. They could bless the package or something, and by smoking one of them, you'd be agreeing to a binding contract that commits your soul to the Catholics.

Ah, the possibilities...
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Whats next? The pizza that causes a heart attack in 20 mins.? The beer that causes alcoholism with one sip?

C'mon dude, this is stupid.
 
Re: Re: A new product for smokers

Tony said:


Whats next? The pizza that causes a heart attack in 20 mins.? The beer that causes alcoholism with one sip?

C'mon dude, this is stupid.
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YEAH! Now you're thinking! Heh. :D

Of course, it's not a direct parallel, since eating a pizza doesn't make your spouse fat and drinking a beer doesn't get your kids drunk...

Its not like Phillip Morris wants smokers to die.
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True. I just think the government's lines are drawn a little arbitrarily, that was the point of the satire here.

Using the product properly leads to death, I find that kinda funny.

I can tell someone here has never been to "Flavor Country."
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I was very fortunate in that the first and last thing I ever tried to smoke was a "Century Sam" cigar in high-school. I could never have fathomed how sick that would make me. Never went near a tobacco product since.
 
Not everyone who smokes comes down with lung cancer.

Does anyoen else have a problem with these "truth.org" anti smoking commercials. They dont seem to be all that truthful. Or worse, those silly anti-pot commercials. They are laughable.
 
I was thinking about this after reading that other smoking thread. What would be wrong with developing a nicotine inhaler or some other delivery system that lets people get their nicotine fix without all the health and public nusiance effects? I don't see any technical obstacles, and think it could be done relatively cheaply.

I suspect the FDA wouldn't go for it, but I'm not sure why. Maybe because it would mean admitting that nicotine is a mood altering recreational drug. There would probably be lots of legislative resistance because you couldn't use the excuse that it's a public health problem to tax it.

So smokers, if you could get your nicotine fix this way rather than smoking, would you? If not, why?
 
JeffR said:
I was thinking about this after reading that other smoking thread. What would be wrong with developing a nicotine inhaler or some other delivery system that lets people get their nicotine fix without all the health and public nusiance effects? I don't see any technical obstacles, and think it could be done relatively cheaply.

I suspect the FDA wouldn't go for it, but I'm not sure why. Maybe because it would mean admitting that nicotine is a mood altering recreational drug. There would probably be lots of legislative resistance because you couldn't use the excuse that it's a public health problem to tax it.

So smokers, if you could get your nicotine fix this way rather than smoking, would you? If not, why?
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Nicotine is already found in patches and gum but with the express purpose as a quitting aid.

It IS an interesting idea.... just to see how the HMO's would jump on the 'bash smokers bandwagon' and declare that smokers have no right to use nicotine for sheer "pleasure."
 
JeffR said:

So smokers, if you could get your nicotine fix this way rather than smoking, would you? If not, why?
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'Smoking' Is a lot more than an addiction to nicotine. If it was just the nicotine, it would no longer be a problem, since, as others have pointed out, other forms of nicotine are available.

It involves a lot of the same elements of other ' compulsive obsessive ' behavior/disorders.
 
JeffR: hmmmm. If you can get the same nicotine fix from a patch, you could avoid the stigma of being a "smoker".

Maybe it's the psychological gratification of sucking on them or something?

Not everyone who smokes comes down with lung cancer.
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Not everyone who buys a lottery ticket loses. Not every guess a psychic makes is wrong.

What's the point? If my cigarrettes don't kill every person within thirty seconds, just, say 60% of them, then does that change anything?

I have seen some dopey anti-smoking commercials. I think the tobacco companies, when they settled their court cases, forced the litigants to agree not to run certain kinds of anti-smoking ads. Ironically enough, the one's they can't use are the most effective. I saw something about it on 60 minutes at some point.

Tried pot. Twice. I am one of those lucky individuals who don't seem to be affected by it, at least, not at the dosage I received. I remember my mum telling me that when she was a girl she was immune to the cocaine that the dentists used to use at that time. (This was in the U.K., by the way).
 
Mel said:


Nicotine is already found in patches and gum but with the express purpose as a quitting aid.

It IS an interesting idea.... just to see how the HMO's would jump on the 'bash smokers bandwagon' and declare that smokers have no right to use nicotine for sheer "pleasure."
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Weren't (are?) some of the nicotine ' stop smoking ' products available only by prescription?

That's realy ironic, huh?:confused:
 
Silly me. I thought nicotine gums and patches were prescription only, but I see they're available over the counter.

$28 for 48 pieces of Nicorette gum at drugstore.com. They suggest chewing between 12 pieces minimum and 30 maximum at first, so maybe it costs about $10 to $15 a day. I don't know what cigarettes cost now days but I didn't think they were that expensive.
 
JeffR said:
Silly me. I thought nicotine gums and patches were prescription only, but I see they're available over the counter.

$28 for 48 pieces of Nicorette gum at drugstore.com. They suggest chewing between 12 pieces minimum and 30 maximum at first, so maybe it costs about $10 to $15 a day. I don't know what cigarettes cost now days but I didn't think they were that expensive.
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The idea is that you will quit smoking and not chew nicotine gum the rest of your life...

The savings in that case would be considerable...
 
Diogenes said:


What is your point?
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Well my point originally was that if a product that kills you if used properly is legal, then does it matter how long it takes to kill you? If so, then what logic determines the length of time? If not, then my fictional product could and should be just as legal as cigarettes.
 
kourama said:


Well my point originally was that if a product that kills you if used properly is legal, then does it matter how long it takes to kill you?
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The fallacy in your whole line of thought is that cig. smoking doesnt kill EVERYBODY that smokes.
 
kourama, all you gotta do is make your fictional product so that the user has the same odds of dying from using it as he would from habitually smoking cigarettes.
 
JeffR said:
kourama, all you gotta do is make your fictional product so that the user has the same odds of dying from using it as he would from habitually smoking cigarettes.
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That product already exists, its called GHB.
 
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