5 Things You Think Work, But Actually Don't

[William Parcher]

5 Things You Think Work, But Actually Don't

Most people are well aware of the placebo effect as it pertains to medicine... But the placebo effect is by no means limited to medicine. In our daily lives we constantly encounter situations where products or services don't work as promised. Yet far from stomping off to complain to someone, we instead come away convinced that the button we were pressing was doing exactly what it said it would. If a button says it will close the elevator doors but doesn't appear to have the desired effect, we still find a way to convince ourselves that it was doing what it said it would.


The Elevator "Close Doors" Button

Let's start with the most obvious example: That pesky "close doors" button on the elevator. It's a fairly well-established fact that on most elevators it's what essentially amounts to a dummy button.

"HD" TV

We're not suggesting that HD TVs aren't really high-definition, though the various technical terminology might make it hard to determine just how good the picture quality really is. But for some people, simply seeing the "HD" label on the TV is enough to convince them that the picture is better, even if they don't have the proper connection or they're not watching an HD channel.

Walk Signal Buttons

Many cities and towns have buttons at crosswalks that allow a pedestrian to speed up the arrival of a walk signal. And in many places, they do exactly what they promise to do. But not everywhere.

Butt-Toning Shoes

In the case of elevator and walk signal buttons, there's no deliberate deception involved — technology just changed, and nobody bothered to inform the people who were still pressing away in vain. But sometimes you have the classic case of a company making claims that it can't back up.

Office Thermostats

We hate to break it to you, but big companies aren't just going to let a chilly employee crank the heat up whenever he or she pleases. But if they simply locked the thermostat or put the controls out of reach, the employees would constantly complain. The solution: A thermostat that doesn't actually do anything but placate the chilly masses.

I guess because these things sometimes don't work you can go ahead and write an article saying that they don't work. Maybe the shoes are the only thing that really never works.

6. Articles With Highly Attractive Headlines

We hate to break it to you, but sometimes articles aren't as interesting or informative as you had expected. You click on the link and are met with some disappointment and skepticism.

 

[Ray Brady]

The HDTV entry is pure nonsense. HDTVs do exactly what they claim to do. The fact that some people can't tell the difference between a standard signal and an HD signal is an entirely different matter.

 

[I Ratant]

The walk buttons around here merely turn on the walk sign when the green traffic light in the direction desired to walk comes on.
They don't alter the sequencing of the lights, which are synchronized to the traffic flow all along the streets.
I'd be surprised if it were any different anywhere.
Don't push the button, the walk sign stays off.
Push the button, the sign turns on.
Push the button many times, or hold it... pointless.
Once will do the job.

 

[Halfcentaur]

The HDTV entry is pure nonsense. HDTVs do exactly what they claim to do. The fact that some people can't tell the difference between a standard signal and an HD signal is an entirely different matter.

I am really weary of people who aren't sensitive to this sort of thing and act as if I am just some snob. It's night and freaking day.

 

[Big Les]

Likewise the close doors button. Our lifts at work have an open and a close button - I've experimented with both and you can stand there opening and closing the doors to your heart's content.

And 'Fitflops' don't actually claim to tone your bum, so that's bollocks as well.

 

[William Parcher]

Likewise the close doors button. Our lifts at work have an open and a close button - I've experimented with both and you can stand there opening and closing the doors to your heart's content.

When I'm in an elevator I use the close button because there's often no need to wait for the built-in delay. I use it after other passengers get off on their floor too. It just makes the whole operation more speedy. I also will use the open button if I see somebody dashing towards the door and it is in the process of closing. You can hold the open button to let in a group of people. Usually these two buttons will control the door within a split second of pushing them.

None of this would be possible if those buttons didn't actually work.

In the US, elevators must pass regular official inspections for safety and operation. I wouldn't be surprised if functioning open/close buttons are necessary for approval.

 

[JWideman]

7. Matt Brownell

Must be nice to pass off a List of So-called Facts as journalism.

 

[alfaniner]

I also will use the open button if I see somebody dashing towards the door and it is in the process of closing.

I tried that once, and it didn't work. It was obvious from the look on the person's face that they thought I was either hitting the Close button or flagrantly pushing the button for my floor and letting the door close in their face.

 

[sadhatter]

I am really weary of people who aren't sensitive to this sort of thing and act as if I am just some snob. It's night and freaking day.

I wanted to make a joke, but an old commercial already said it best.

Guys watching a hockey game, distorted, all messed up, on his new t.v., loving it. His buddy informs him it is messed up, and he tries everything to not admit this.

I find irl it goes a step further, with the usual end of the conversation being " Well i think it looks better" in an angry huff.

 

[NobbyNobbs]

What really doesn't work is repeatedly pressing the button to call the elevator in the hopes it will come faster. And what's strange is I'm guilty of it even though I know better. It's almost compulsive.

 

[sadhatter]

When I'm in an elevator I use the close button because there's often no need to wait for the built-in delay. I use it after other passengers get off on their floor too. It just makes the whole operation more speedy. I also will use the open button if I see somebody dashing towards the door and it is in the process of closing. You can hold the open button to let in a group of people. Usually these two buttons will control the door within a split second of pushing them.

None of this would be possible if those buttons didn't actually work.

In the US, elevators must pass regular official inspections for safety and operation. I wouldn't be surprised if functioning open/close buttons are necessary for approval.

The entire article seems to be a giant load of misunderstanding. I think what they were getting at with this one is...

Some elevators ( most where i am) have a delay in which the close button does not work, to combat the knob who presses it the second he gets in. Usually shorter than the normal delay but there none the less.

What are these people expecting? It to close in an instant snapping shut with enough force to sever a limb?

 

[John Albert]

And what's the deal with airline food?

 

[Paul2]

What really doesn't work is repeatedly pressing the button to call the elevator in the hopes it will come faster. And what's strange is I'm guilty of it even though I know better. It's almost compulsive.

I hit it repeatedly on the chance that something is broken and even though it looks like it's called the elevator, it really hasn't.

 

[TjW]

And what's the deal with airline food?

There's no such thing. It's revenge perpetuated on air travelers by Howard Hughes, who was mightily offended by the joke whose punchline is: "So, would you like TWA coffee, or TWA tea?"

 

[I Ratant]

Looking at the responses on the link, the author really got piled on!

 

[Halfcentaur]

I wanted to make a joke, but an old commercial already said it best.

Guys watching a hockey game, distorted, all messed up, on his new t.v., loving it. His buddy informs him it is messed up, and he tries everything to not admit this.

I find irl it goes a step further, with the usual end of the conversation being " Well i think it looks better" in an angry huff.

I've seen people who have no idea what they're doing with their HDTV, clearly not aware what they're looking at is not HD. It's funny. But to me there's a massive difference, I am used to PC gaming since the middle 90s. I am still waiting for HDtv to catch up to computer displays. HDTV was an awesome step forward towards achieving that.

 

[Andy_Ross]

Crossing signal buttons work on most of the lights around here. IF no one presses a button the crossing sequence is skipped from the light changes so traffic isn't held up by delays for non existant pedestrians. Also we have crossings in the UK that are independant of traffic lights at junctions and are there just to get people across busy roads. They stay on green all the time for traffic unless someone wants to cross, so called PELICON Crossings (PEdestrian LIght CONtrolled)

 

[sadhatter]

Crossing signal buttons work on most of the lights around here. IF no one presses a button the crossing sequence is skipped from the light changes so traffic isn't held up by delays for non existant pedestrians. Also we have crossings in the UK that are independant of traffic lights at junctions and are there just to get people across busy roads. They stay on green all the time for traffic unless someone wants to cross, so called PELICON Crossings (PEdestrian LIght CONtrolled)

What i hate is when you get to a crossing, there is a group of people already standing there, you assume someone pressed the button. But upon the light change , no one has. Angrily, you walk over and press it , and hear someone from the crowd exclaim " Oh , you have to push the button?".

No you single celled life form, it is a neural net capable device that reads your mind i was just being old fashioned.

 

[AgeGap]

....And 'Fitflops' don't actually claim to tone your bum, so that's bollocks as well.

Reebok claims otherwise.

Link

Video.

 

[KingofMadCows]

You win this round B.F. Skinner.