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Unable to read after trauma?

wasapi

Penultimate Amazing
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
16,463
I have been a prolific reader since age 4. My mother learned early on that the way to keep me quiet and out of her hair, was to keep me supplied. From childhood until recently, I have average about 2 novels a week.

Then. About a year and a half ago, I went through severe trauma. At first, I thought it would pass, and eventually I would be able to concentrate again on my books. But to this day, when I try to start a book, my mind allows about a paragraph, and I then draw a blank, and keep rereading a few times before giving up.

It seems I need to work on getting back to what has been such a passion for me, a great-escape. Is anyone familiar with this, or have any suggestions? Thanks so much.
 
I have been a prolific reader since age 4. My mother learned early on that the way to keep me quiet and out of her hair, was to keep me supplied. From childhood until recently, I have average about 2 novels a week.



Then. About a year and a half ago, I went through severe trauma. At first, I thought it would pass, and eventually I would be able to concentrate again on my books. But to this day, when I try to start a book, my mind allows about a paragraph, and I then draw a blank, and keep rereading a few times before giving up.



It seems I need to work on getting back to what has been such a passion for me, a great-escape. Is anyone familiar with this, or have any suggestions? Thanks so much.
what genres did you like to read and are trying to read? mabe try a different genre including ones you have not tried previously. The trauma may have shifted your tastes.

Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk
 
What changed in your life since the event? ( don't tell us if it isn't comfortable )

When I finally stopped hating my job it was far easier to quit smoking. Too easy. Drinking went to occasional at best. Finding stuff to do and a better class of folks to work with made escape unnecessary.

Leaving Druggyville behind I stopped reading as much. I had read the entire sci fi section and 2/3 the mystery section of two local libraries. I did more outside and did hobbies a lot more.

Eventually I had to have a little shop well stocked with tools. Work/family/diy home stuff eats up my week to where reading just isn't happening unless it's online.
 
Hey wasapi, I actually had nearly the exact same thing happen to me a few years ago. I solved it by switching to reading non-fiction books for awhile, mostly history. Gradually, I started getting the urge to blend some historical fiction in with the non-fiction. (Currently reading Wolf Hall, which I highly recommend despite a little historical inaccuracy, artistic liberty, etc.) .

Nowadays, I'm mostly back to being able to read whatever I want (though I still prefer history and non-fiction). However, my enjoyment of a good trash novel has yet to return. That's the only thing. I can't seem to enjoy "guilty pleasure" books anymore.
 
I've had a similar experience about 8 years ago. I pretty much only listen to audible books now. I've also had a kid and gotten a MS since then so, there are other reasons I don't read as much. You may recover where I haven't though.
 
Thanks everyone. I wish I could listen to books on tape, but they have never worked well for me.
I believe I went into a type of shock after finding my boyfriend 18 months ago, who had committed suicide. Not concentrating seemed expected, and at the time, it was the least of my concerns.
Now I feel as if I need to retrain my brain in some way!
 
If you find anything that works I'd be interested. I can just about manage five minutes at bedtime, but the focus I used to have is gone, since my own loss. Would love to be able to enjoy a good book again.
 
If you find anything that works I'd be interested. I can just about manage five minutes at bedtime, but the focus I used to have is gone, since my own loss. Would love to be able to enjoy a good book again.

Oh, sphenisc, this, exactly this.
 
I have trouble concentrating enough to read if I'm under a lot of stress. And of course choice of book matters, not just subject matter but style of writing: if a writer employs excessively flowery or complex style it can make extra work when you're not in the mood. Also mood-dependent: are you reading something new, or rereading something you've read before? Sometimes I pay more attention to a book if I'm appreciating an old favorite, and sometimes it's too familiar so my attention wanders.

I guess I have no practical advice except try different books until you hit upon one suitable for you at the moment.
 
I have trouble concentrating enough to read if I'm under a lot of stress. And of course choice of book matters, not just subject matter but style of writing: if a writer employs excessively flowery or complex style it can make extra work when you're not in the mood. Also mood-dependent: are you reading something new, or rereading something you've read before? Sometimes I pay more attention to a book if I'm appreciating an old favorite, and sometimes it's too familiar so my attention wanders.

I guess I have no practical advice except try different books until you hit upon one suitable for you at the moment.

Good advise, TM. I have mostly tried some familiar, comfortable books, like the Dean Koons's Odd Thomas series. My mind wanders after the first paragraph. Perhaps it is time to try something new to me. It must not be too complex. I just want my favorite past time back! Now, it is time to try something new!
 
My mind wanders after the first paragraph. Perhaps it is time to try something new to me. It must not be too complex.
After trauma I couldn't read (except the stuff I read for a living, which wasn't too long) but for some reason took refuge in crossword puzzles, which ordinarily I don't like at all. They had to be Sunday NYT crossword puzzles, which I rarely finished. Weird.
 
I'm very much unqualified to opine about trauma and its effects, psychological or otherwise, I hope you're able to consult a professional.

Can you say what type of fiction or non-fiction you used to like reading?

I have gone through periods of time when I read much less, in the hope that some uninformed inexpert thoughts might be helpful:

1. Try rereading a book you like that is fun and relatively short, so that if your concentration lapses you can continue reading and still know what's going on or stop and you don't have to stress about an unfinished book or not knowing what happens. Or alternatively reading something you've seen the movie adaptation of;

2. Try reading comic books or graphic novels (fun or serious);

3. You said audiobooks don't work for you;

4. Try reading short stories, especially if set in a world you like (if applicable, e.g. if someone likes fantasy or sci-fi and there's a collection of short stories set in the same universe);

5. Other extreme, a book you know will be slow reading with footnotes or endnotes you need to read, so that you will expect it to be slow going (e.g. at one point when I was reading very little fiction, I set a goal of reading at least one "good" book per year, Don Quixote, Canterbury Tales, Inferno, Paradise Lost, etc. - though for many people on this board the latter two may be of limited interest :rolleyes: );

6. In a situation in which you have literally nothing else to do, have (fun, easy read) books with you? Not sure how well this would work I'm thinking of some people travelling/flying who I think might have done something like this, e.g. no earbuds/phone games/magazines/in-flight entertainment, they restricted themselves to reading, sleeping, or talking to fellow passengers.
 
Try A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole.

For some reason, I was able to keep reading it during a time i was having trouble reading anything due to mental disturbance, or whatever you want to call it. There's something about that book.

Or maybe it was just me. But maybe worth a try?
 
Try A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole.

For some reason, I was able to keep reading it during a time i was having trouble reading anything due to mental disturbance, or whatever you want to call it. There's something about that book.

Or maybe it was just me. But maybe worth a try?

Looking it up now! Thanks. I trust your judgement and advice. Wait. For some reason I just realized that sounds a little scary!
 
Looks like you already know that depression can affect one's ability to concentrate and reading takes a certain amount of concentration.

Grieving can last a long time. That doesn't mean it's permanent.
 
I'm very much unqualified to opine about trauma and its effects, psychological or otherwise, I hope you're able to consult a professional.

Can you say what type of fiction or non-fiction you used to like reading?

I have gone through periods of time when I read much less, in the hope that some uninformed inexpert thoughts might be helpful: *clipped*

First off, epeeist, thank you for taking the time to write this. It is interesting to me in a couple of things. You mentioned things that I have tried, as well as some ideas, new to me, to attempt now that you have suggested them.

The answer to what I used to enjoy, I always preferred, starting in childhood with Nancy Drew, to lean towards mystery. As an adult, I worked as a Private Investigator. so the theme extended.

Raymond Chandler and Dasheil Hammet were read multiple times. Robert Parker. A hand full of others. Sue Grafton was one of the very few female PI books I enjoyed.

I am more then open to others. I love Voltaire. DH Lawrence - I have read them all. Reread some. Also, Dean Koontz. Not into SciFi or fantasy.

Again, I thank you!
 
For something cheerful I recommend the Amelia Peabody series by Elizabeth Peters, starting with The Crocodile on the Sandbank. They are more-or-less parodies of the Victorian adventure thrillers of the era in which they're set, but also quite funny and pretty good mysteries. Light reading without being stupid or frivolous; you'll also learn a lot about Egyptology.
 
It sounds very worthy of a read. It's a good bet because I have always been interested in Egyptology.
 
First off, epeeist, thank you for taking the time to write this. It is interesting to me in a couple of things. You mentioned things that I have tried, as well as some ideas, new to me, to attempt now that you have suggested them.

The answer to what I used to enjoy, I always preferred, starting in childhood with Nancy Drew, to lean towards mystery. As an adult, I worked as a Private Investigator. so the theme extended.

Raymond Chandler and Dasheil Hammet were read multiple times. Robert Parker. A hand full of others. Sue Grafton was one of the very few female PI books I enjoyed.

I am more then open to others. I love Voltaire. DH Lawrence - I have read them all. Reread some. Also, Dean Koontz. Not into SciFi or fantasy.

Again, I thank you!

No problem, you give me too much credit, I only hope that something someone here or IRL suggests helps.

One other thought, reading in private, might reading out loud while much slower, help you focus and pay attention, especially for a dialogue-heavy story?

Forgive me if this is impertinent, but given your work as a PI and the situation that led to your trauma, might you want to read either non-mystery, or mysteries that are lighter (e.g. dealing with theft etc. rather than murder), even rereading Nancy Drew which I think get revised to be more modern periodically?

If that's not a concern, just a follow-up thought, do you or did you like mystery movies or shows? There are some - Nero Wolfe there was a series, Agatha Christie (especially Hercule Poirot with all the stories having been done by David Suchet) - for which there are both many books/stories, and many video adaptations available. So you might start reading and if get too distracted switch to the show and finish that story, or vice versa? Do you like Sherlock Holmes, for which similarly shows available? And almost all short stories.

Books only, what about one of the Holmes pastiches featuring female protagonists like the series starting with the Beekeeper's Apprentice by Laurie R. King, or others have written with Irene Adler as a protagonist? If you like books written in first person, maybe that would help draw you in, I've read many Nero Wolfe stories, I like books written in the first person and it's interesting that the protagonist is Archie Goodwin, smart but not a genius, who works for Nero Wolfe.

There are/were some old-school adventure/mystery games, you can easily find lists of best of all time (PC Gamer had an article this year, though don't know how available they all are), or for nostalgia there were some Nancy Drew games that I think many adults also played until the company screwed things up? Might an interactive mystery game or story get you interested in mysteries again? You might want to be similarly careful as to the themes of the game as with books or movies/shows. Or non-computer, a game like Sherlock Holmes Consulting Detective which has cases the players (or one person) investigates choosing where to go and reading description of what clues are found? Just thinking about things that right get you reading short items?
 
You might try doing something else first to help calm the mind a little. Go for a run or a walk, for instance, or try playing a game of chess (against your computer is fine). A little preparation to get yourself into a mental state more amenable to concentration. Singing might work(but choose a few songs and sing them from start to finish).
 
Then. About a year and a half ago, I went through severe trauma. At first, I thought it would pass, and eventually I would be able to concentrate again on my books. But to this day, when I try to start a book, my mind allows about a paragraph, and I then draw a blank, and keep rereading a few times before giving up.



As always, I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm not at all surprised that you're having trouble concentrating.

You might try some puzzles - sudoku, crossword, even find-a-words. Alternatively, those adult coloring books are very good for keeping the mind occupied, even hypnotized. I think once you get lost in a puzzle or rug-hooking or whatever a couple times, you'll start to understand that it's okay to give yourself a rest from the stress of traumatic memories. Then you might find it easier to read.

But I'm a bad example. My PTSD can keep me awake and in a panic for days - literally. Without medication, I couldn't sleep or eat. Without medication, you'd have a hard time convincing me to walk across my own living room.
 
I just had another idea that might be helpful: Have you tried reading aloud? I can sometimes get more enjoyment out of books by reading them aloud and will often do for especially exciting passages.
 
As always, I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm not at all surprised that you're having trouble concentrating.

You might try some puzzles - sudoku, crossword, even find-a-words. Alternatively, those adult coloring books are very good for keeping the mind occupied, even hypnotized. I think once you get lost in a puzzle or rug-hooking or whatever a couple times, you'll start to understand that it's okay to give yourself a rest from the stress of traumatic memories. Then you might find it easier to read.

But I'm a bad example. My PTSD can keep me awake and in a panic for days - literally. Without medication, I couldn't sleep or eat. Without medication, you'd have a hard time convincing me to walk across my own living room.

Thank you, Loss Leader. I have taken up coloring in adult coloring books, and enjoy it.

And, I really understand about life without medication. I could never live without it.
 
I feel you guys. I've also been diagnosed with PTSD. I don't usually tell people, because a lot of people have the attitude of "Were you in a war? No? Then pssshhh." I'm like, take it up with my doctor, buttholes.

I thought of another book I was able to handle during some of the worst of the aftermath. Have you read the Anne of Green Gables books? I know it might seem like a funny suggestion, but I read the first three and found them very comforting. The prose style is entertaining. Oddly, it reminded me of Vonnegut, but free from all the tongue-in-cheek stuff which can be exhausting when you're sad.

EDIT: I should clarify, lol. What reminded me of Vonnegut was the way the prose made me feel, and things being explained in an amusing way that made the characters seem richer. Vonnegut does that too. His books can sometimes make me laugh out loud, just from the way things are worded. He's no good when I'm extremely depressed and agitated though. There is a cynicism underlying his humor that ceases to be refreshing when I'm miserable, and instead becomes grating.
 
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I have been a reader since grade school. My last job was for a man who is probably the most miserable and least human human being I have personally met. Honestly I can not think of a single good quality - he has a a couple traits that could be called good qualities but they always have strings attached. I have several nicknames for him the only one I can really fully write here would be the troll (always in only lower case and even then there's usually a third word in the middle of the string).

I was so depressed and stressed working for him there were long stretches I could not read or focus enough to try.

Now that I am free and no longer have to cross the bridge he dwells under most of my ability to read has returned although there are times I lack the focus still.

As has been suggested switching genres has been helpful and for the first time having two different books going has been very helpful. Also rereading favorite books has been a good way to get back.

Good luck and hope you get it back.
 
I have been a reader since grade school. My last job was for a man who is probably the most miserable and least human human being I have personally met. Honestly I can not think of a single good quality - he has a a couple traits that could be called good qualities but they always have strings attached. I have several nicknames for him the only one I can really fully write here would be the troll (always in only lower case and even then there's usually a third word in the middle of the string).

I was so depressed and stressed working for him there were long stretches I could not read or focus enough to try.

Now that I am free and no longer have to cross the bridge he dwells under most of my ability to read has returned although there are times I lack the focus still.

As has been suggested switching genres has been helpful and for the first time having two different books going has been very helpful. Also rereading favorite books has been a good way to get back.

Good luck and hope you get it back.

Thanks so much for this. I really had not considered changing genres. But I will now.
 
Another thing I sometimes do is reread my favorite childhood books. I kept most of the really good ones, and over the last few years have bought quite a few I remember checking out of libraries as a kid.

The Ramona books by Beverly Cleary are awesome at any age.
 
Another thing I sometimes do is reread my favorite childhood books. I kept most of the really good ones, and over the last few years have bought quite a few I remember checking out of libraries as a kid.
Afte
The Ramona books by Beverly Cleary are awesome at any age.


WOAH!!! I had not thought about her in years, but she was a big part of my childhood!


I wrote her a letter, and she wrote back. After spending countless hours reading, often with the a flashlight under the covers late into the night. I started to feel as if she knew me, was a friend. Being one of those "odd kids", I had few. So, the letter.

Heartbreaking. So different then I had hoped. I had written about 3 long pages about my life, and how I identified with some of her characters. Then, I got carried away explaining how lonely I was. That I had no friends. And, my daddy already died and my mother who had an untreated, (other then alcohol), abused me. I didn't use that word.


There was probably more. I don't recall if I shared that I was already cutting myself. But she wrote back, and it seemed she shattered me again. I'm sure she meant well, starting with a 'let's all think joyfully! Have a good attitude! Lets love rainbows and flowers', type of pro-positive thinking. OK. But then it changed.

It started to become admonishing. She said perhaps I wasn't being the best daughter to my mother, and the poor mother lost her young husband. (Not a problem for her, as she married his best friend 8 months later). Perhaps, she suggested, I didn't have friends because being sad, no wanted to be around me so, "SMILE!!!"

I kept the letter for several years, then burned it in my wood stove about 20 years ago. Ah well.

However, TM, thanks so much for helping me take a trip back, far away. And I did love those books, and kept reading them even after The Letter! And now, I'm going to read them again.

Really, TM, thank you.
 
I look at plant and seed catalogues for bedtime reading nowadays. Used to read books continuously also.


Sorry to hear about you finding your boyfriend like that. What an awful shock.
 
I had PTSD before I moved in 10 years ago to care for my father (macular degeneration and dementia). After he died in 2017, I had no appetite for reading (or writing). I took up jigsaw puzzles until I was able to immerse myself again in a book (and writing). (It's taken a couple of years.)

Very sorry for your loss and trauma.
 
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I look at plant and seed catalogues for bedtime reading nowadays. Used to read books continuously also.


Sorry to hear about you finding your boyfriend like that. What an awful shock.


Thank you, and it's funny but I have actually been thumbing through those catalogues lately!
 
I had PTSD before I moved in 10 years ago to care for my father (macular degeneration and dementia). After he died in 2017, I had no appetite for reading (or writing). I took up jigsaw puzzles until I was able to immerse myself again in a book (and writing). (It's taken a couple of years.)

Very sorry for your loss and trauma.


Desmirelle, I'm so very sorry for your loss. What you said about puzzles is interesting because I have found myself being drawn to math equations. I am far from a mathematician! However, there is something about giving myself a challenge with numbers is comforting. I like numbers, and I like there is no gray areas about '2+2'!
 
Thirty years ago, I managed to get my head in the same place and at the same time as a cricket ball. In the vennacular, I had a bang on the bonce. In brief I was unable to read or speak for a few months. (Strangely, I was able to understand what others were saying.)

My speech is still a bit slurred now and again and I do still have trouble reading out loud.

Most sadly, I became hooked on the soap Neighbours for a while - all I could do when I left hospital was watch TV. I have not been able to develop any compensatory Ninja skill.

Hope you recover, wasapi.
 
I can't say that I have the problem you have but I am willing to make a few suggestions.

Graphic novels are a good choice as epeeist said. I can suggest a few if you like.

Children's books also a good choice, I still enjoy reading Winnie the Pooh and the House at Pooh Corner. Reading them aloud even if it is just to a companion animal is still fun.

Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it. And then he feels that perhaps there isn't.​
 
I can say I have experienced your problem of not being able to concentrate enough to read. In fact that was the first symptom of schizophrenia that I had months before the condition became critical. I was trying to read the book ' catch twenty two' which is not a difficult book to read,but I could not concentrate on it. A few months later I developed full blown schizophrenia. It took years to overcome this, and one of the things I did was mental exercises. I used to do mental arithmetic all day in order to focus my mind, and this eventually lead me to get O level maths.

In the short term the last poster suggested you try graphic novels. and I second that, but there are a series of very good non fiction books called, introducing, a graphics guide. They are clearly written in short bursts of text, and contain lots of well researched information with profuse illustrations. I strongly recommend them as I have a collection of them. Here is a link.
https://www.introducingbooks.com/
 
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