I find it hard to believe you're so stupid; but maybe you are.
Look, kid, I've been debating with Creationists for more than a decade now. If you want to insult me, calling me "stupid" isn't even going to come close to the worst insult I've recieved TODAY. Put some effort in, man! At least be a LITTLE creative.
[1] Radioactive decay exists - some elements spontaneously decay in a way presumably not understood. Generally this is a slow process, certainly in nature, otherwise it wouldn't be noticeable. Atomic weights vary, and the general idea of eg. neutrons being given off, nuclei splitting, electrons rearranging, or something, is established.
[2] An atomic explosion needs several extra things: (1) There must be a chain reaction (2) that chain reaction has to be set off or triggered in some way, to be controllable (3) there has to be a lot of energy produced (4) the energy has to cause an explosion, rather than e.g. melting or dissipation (5) an optional extra is fusion.
This has precisely NOTHING to do with the nuclear physics involved, and as such is really irrelevant to my claim. As for the steps, 1 is more or less certain (the concept you're looking for here is "critical mass"), 2 can be accomplished with a neutron gun, 3 isn't a requirement it's a result, 4 isn't a requirement it's a result, and 5 is a straw man since you and I have been discussing fission.
As for the speed of the process, it's hardly slow. Radon gas is poisonous, and uraninite can completely expose the film in a radiation badge in two hours (seen the experimental evidence). Cosmogenic isotopes can decay at even faster rates (see that Faure and Mensing book for a full discussion). So that part's a fabrication.
But it worth noting that the sun does not explode, despite being powered supposedly by fusion.
Actually, a better view of the sun (any star, really) is that it's a massive explosion, so large that it occurs on astronomic timescales--it's just ballanced by the pull of gravity, which is equally massive. "Explosion" doesn't mean "instant", just "really, really fast". I suggest talking to any astronomer on the topic.
I presume 'salvage paleontology' means something like dating underwater artefacts, both man made and e.g. fossil and natural, such as rocks.
You would be utterly wrong. Look up the term rather than making assumptions. I would suggest that this habbit of making assumptions is the cause of many of the problems people have with your ideas.
Perfectly valid thing to be. But does it qualify you to explain why films of early 'nukes' are faked?
I have knowledge of isotopic geochemistry, which does qualify me to discuss nuclear physics at a level exceeding anything you've presented thus far. I'll certainly bow to any of the experts on nuclear physics in this discussion, but when it comes to the science behind nuclear bombs I'm at the level of a very informed lay person. A background in the K/Pg event also means that I'm more familiar than most with the energy necessary to cause certain deformations, like shock quartz. My wife studied physics as a Ph.D. candidate (left the program when we moved for my job), so I've actually discussed nuclear physics with physicists. Again, I'll bow to experts here but I certainly won't be intimidated by someone who's yet to demonstrate an understanding of the basics behind nuclear physics.