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Australia

sorry, fosters is cr@p we pass of to foreigners.
no one here actually drinks it.


It's huge joke that we've been playing on the rest of the world for years, and I love it. :D



we really drink stuff like XXXX (also known as mothers milk).


Whereabouts in Queensland are you cobber?



edit - i see i was beaten to the punch. bugga


What's the difference between a Tasmanian and a computer?


You only have to punch the information into a computer once.
 
From my book-learning at school we was taught that tazzy is linked to the mainland by a land bridge that since the first fleet landed has gone under water.


The land bridge sank at the end of the last Ice Age, circa 10,000 BCE.




If i remember rightly tazzy was called van diemens land then.


Tasmania was originally named Anthoonij van Diemenslandt (Van Diemen's Land) on 24 November 1642 by the brave Dutch explorer, Abel Tasman, whose name it now bears. The name change occurred in 1856.



edit - regardless, tazzy has awesome landscapes and best of all, the beer they make with the tazzy tiger on it, cascade i think, bloody bewdiful


Yes and yes
 
@ SimonD

Firstly, an apology to you.

In my earlier post addressed to you I included a link that went to a joke article in Uncyclopædia. I would have corrected it but for missing the editing deadline.

Here is the ANZAC link that I meant to provide.



Having spent ANZAC day in Turkey in 2008, I would have to say that while all the tour guides paint it as a draw, the Turk in the street sees it as a great victory. They seem to have forgotten that while they may have won the battle, they lost the war.


Akhenaten paints it as a draw, the Kiwi and the Aussie in the street sees it as our finest hour. YMMV

Everyone loses in war. I say this as a former soldier.


Cheers

Dave
 
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I have always had a bit of an attachment to this poem. I recall reading it years ago. In particular the last verse has always touched me.


aus-a.gif


Our Flag

Author unknown


Our Flag wears the stars that blaze at night,
In our Southern skies of blue,
And a little old flag in the corner,
That’s part of our heritage too.
It’s for the English, the Scots and the Irish,
Who were sent to the ends of the earth,
The rogues and schemers, the doers and dreamers,
Who gave modern Australia its birth.
And you, who are shouting to change it,
You don’t seem to understand,
It’s the flag of our laws and our language,
Not the flag of a faraway land.
Though there are plenty of people who'll tell you,
How when Europe was plunged into night,
That little old flag in the corner,
Was their symbol of freedom and light.
It doesn’t mean we owe allegiance,
To a forgotten imperial dream,
We’ve the stars to show where we’re going,
And the old flag to show where we’ve been.[/SIZE]


It’s only an old piece of bunting,
It’s only an old piece of rag,
But there are thousands who’ve died for its honour,
And shed of their blood for OUR FLAG.



That's a wonderful contibution, and I'm happy to creat a duplicate.

Thank you and cheers,

Dave
 
Does Australia really warrant two threads on this forum?


Yes, I agree. There should be at least 3


Pshaw! That many would constitute spamming. How many discussions do we need about beer and cricket?




The Holy Bibble - Exodus said:
These commandments were given directly by Bruce to the people of 'Straya at Mount Bogong after He had delivered them from a huge barbie in Oodnadatta:

"And Bruce spoke all these words, saying: 'I am the Thread your Cobber . . .

  • You shall have no other threads before Me.

  • You shall not make for yourself a carved image - any likeness of any other thread that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

  • You shall not take the name of the Thread your Cobber in vain.

  • Remember Melbourne Cup Day, to keep it holy.

  • Honor your father and your mother.

  • You shall not murder.

  • You shall not commit adultery where possible.

  • You shall not steal although exemptions may apply to gummint property and threads.

  • You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor unless he dodges his shout.

  • You shall not covet your neighbor's thread; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife's thread, nor his male servant's thread, nor his female servant's thread, nor his kangaroo's thread, nor his koala's thread, nor anything that has already been dealt with in your neighbor's thread.' "



So now I find myself at a loss as to how I should proceed.
 
Well I am just a newby and a hummer and clank. But the thistle wot you are glommin' is cop, I Adam.


If you were really a hammer and clank I'd expect to see more staw in your Spanish guitar*.


Strewth, yer slippin' in a few Pommie ones in on me. :)

Any'ow, glommin' is a bit 'arsh. I just borrer some stuff occasionally, so there's no point comin' the raw prawn.


* avatar


Cheers Mate,

Dave
 
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The one that the other two were having for dinner.


An American tourist arrives at Sydney airport and proceeds to the customs check

Customs Officer: Sir do you have a criminal record?

American: Wow I didn't realise you still needed one
 
:D

We do get big tides, must have been a big out when the map was drawn.


:D


Yeppoon gets 5.4m spring tides and it is more in places like Darwin.


Yeah, the tides up north are amazing. Port Hedland in Western Australia has some beauties.

Some people including myself refer to Yeppoon as Jappoon because it was developed by a Japanese company. No offence is intended, although one bloke tried to blow the resort up when it was being built, because he forgot the war ended in 1945. There are fruitcakes everywhere.


I just got the poem "Our Flag" out to post but MG. got in first. Carry it in my wallet.


I'm going to adopt the same habit. I'll bet you have another poem for us. :)


Going back to a early post about the Spanish huts that C. Cook got rid of at Little Cove. I was told they were stone huts, our lot don't do stone. (too heavy).


Here is a photograph of Little Cove today. Crikey! What's that amongst the trees?


LittleBay.jpg

© STA Travel

Stone huts are definitely not Koori, so who knows?


To see this country it takes a life time, we have seen about half from cold Tassy to the hot north. The Barkley Tableland is so vast; it's flat and treeless in all directions and well worth a drive across, but don't break down, and go in winter time.


To demonstrate your point, here is a short slide show of the Barkley Tableland

I'm 55 and about ½ way through seeing everything too. The next 45 years will give me a bit more material for the thread, I hope. :)



Must dig out a photo showing our truck coated in sand flies, run into a big mob near Miles.(that's WNW from the Sunshine Coast) Thank you all for the nice things said, we all try in our own way.


I know Miles and Chinchilla pretty well. Tough country and people. You been to Banana? I love the ironic name, and they sell tee-shirts there with "Well Oil Beef Hooked"* printed on the front of them.

* Say it out loud with a mock Irish accent.


I, for one, appreciate your efforts very much. Thank you, Bob.


Cheers Mate,

Dave
 
Whereabouts in Queensland are you cobber?

All around the great south east, i've lived up at the sunshine coast (my favourite place in the world - mooloolaba), all the way down to the gold coast but currently i have a wonderful 3-bedroom mortgage with my fiancee at beenleigh, about a half an hour south of brisbane.
 
the maps i was thinkin of were the early ones done by dutch explorers and the like who were to lazy to actually go all the way around the coastline and just made up the rest based on observations. They would've made bloody good aussies, bit of a shame.
 
i must say theres a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge difference between modern aussie slang and the cockney spoken by the first fleet.

we tend not to sound like street urchins from dickens but more like crocodile dundee if he was stoned out of his gourd.
 
Yes, the west island, where Pavlova was invented.


:D Alas! You have uncovered a flaw in my patriotism. I cannot stand Pavlova. Here is another link, which may be Not Safe For Diabetics.



As for the Turks, they are indeed our mates. I don’t think we could claim a draw out of that one though. I saw some pictures on display over here recently (to mark the Dardanelles naval victory on March 18) that included one of a digger in a slouch hat carrying a wounded comrade across his shoulders with apparent ease. Another showed an ANZAC offering a cup to a wounded Turk. They did us proud in many ways.


Yes both sides are deserving of the great respect they learned for each other. And you are correct, the brave Turks flogged our arses, no question.

Nobody else could have, so good for them.



Fans of Turkish soccer club Galatasary seem crazy about our Harry Kewell, while Gençlerbirligi were so impressed by the character of Josip Skoko they now have 3 or 4 Aussies on the roster. We are pretty welcome in this part of the world.

My bolding

This makes me very proud.

Gençlerbirligi broke something in my mouth when I tried to say it out loud.


Ka kite anō mate,

Dave
 

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