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Does 'rape culture' accurately describe (many) societies?

acbytesla said:
Last time.

It means it has nothing to do with porn. Cheating is about breaking a trust. It has nothing to do with sex or porn. It has to do with honesty.
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No, you are making light of the importance of intimacy in a relationship (probably because you make light of the impact porn has on society). Sex outside of a marriage/relationship is generally considered a valid reason to end it; people don't generally do so because their partner lied about a trivial matter.
 
Poem said:
No, you are making light of the importance of intimacy in a relationship (probably because you make light of the impact porn has on society). Sex outside of a marriage/relationship is generally considered a valid reason to end it; people don't generally do so because their partner lied about a trivial matter.
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No I'm not. You can insist this all day. But every relationship is not identical. What works for one relationship DOESN’T work for another.
 
Poem said:
Adultery is the moral equivalent of choosing the wrong hair colour?
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It is whatever it is to the people involved in a relationship. What do you find confusing about that?
Poem said:
Is it possible that porn advocates are forced to downplay the import of sex with respect to relationships? Intimacy is foundational for most relationships isn't it? What's the difference between one's friend and one's sexual partner after all?
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For many of us there is no difference.
 
Poem said:
No, you are making light of the importance of intimacy in a relationship (probably because you make light of the impact porn has on society). Sex outside of a marriage/relationship is generally considered a valid reason to end it; people don't generally do so because their partner lied about a trivial matter.
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Can I introduce you to a concept called a 'Bell Curve'?
 
Poem should check out the movie Don Jon. It provides an interesting take on porn and relationships.
 
Poem said:
Are you advocating individualism at all costs?
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I'm sure as hell advocating individualism when people are deciding what they want in a partner for their own relationships. And yes I mean all parties in a relationship, before you suggest the knee-jerk 'well this is what person 1 wants so person 2 can go hang then?' straw man.

Porn is only going to break up a family with kids if people were being very dishonest at the planning and communication stages, either saying it wasn't a problem when it was, or saying they were okay with not using it when they weren't.

It may be a symptom when a relationship gets rocky, I'll grant that. IE people that stop finding one another attractive or sex 'too much work' might turn to porn without bringing their partners into the conversation. But this is already disfunctional before you even get to the porn.
 
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Poem said:
Anyone - what is cheating on your partner(s) and why is it bad?
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I've answered this before, but you've obviously forgotten.

Cheating is defined as breaking your partner's trust.

Poem said:
Why, for many (probably most), is sex outside the marriage/relationship even considered cheating? What actually is the essence of the 'problem'?
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Because monogamy is the cultural assumption, and even if it is not explicitly stated (in marriage vows, for example), then it is commonly assumed.

Poem said:
Is terminating a marriage (let's assume they have children) due to one's partner dying their hair red, as valid a reason for doing so as for, say, extra-marital sex (or, for that matter, for porn consumption)?
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How dare you apply your assumptions to my relationship? I don't follow your rules. By what right do you impose your rules on me and any sexual or romantic partner or partners I might have? What business is it of yours?
 
This is all pseudosocratic nonsense. Poem is trying to manufacture agreement through a series of loaded questions, rather than just formulating a complete argument of their own, and letting others make up their own minds. I don't know why anyone is playing along.
 
theprestige said:
This is all pseudosocratic nonsense. Poem is trying to manufacture agreement through a series of loaded questions, rather than just formulating a complete argument of their own, and letting others make up their own minds. I don't know why anyone is playing along.
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Because we have nothing better to do.
 
arthwollipot said:
I've answered this before, but you've obviously forgotten.

Cheating is defined as breaking your partner's trust.


Because monogamy is the cultural assumption, and even if it is not explicitly stated (in marriage vows, for example), then it is commonly assumed.


How dare you apply your assumptions to my relationship? I don't follow your rules. By what right do you impose your rules on me and any sexual or romantic partner or partners I might have? What business is it of yours?
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Because there can only be one (special relationship type). Sorry was watching a trailer for the new Highlander movie.
 
theprestige said:
This is all pseudosocratic nonsense. Poem is trying to manufacture agreement through a series of loaded questions, rather than just formulating a complete argument of their own, and letting others make up their own minds. I don't know why anyone is playing along.
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That's very cynical TP.

You have expressed concern over absent fathers - so my point is (and I think most will agree) that we do not have a great track record when it comes to relationships and child-rearing - and legalising porn will be part of the reason why it's poor.

And saturating young kids with rule 34 porn is off the scale bad in that respect. It shouldn't take a kid to shout out that the emperor is in fact naked.
 
arthwollipot said:
How dare you apply your assumptions to my relationship? I don't follow your rules. By what right do you impose your rules on me and any sexual or romantic partner or partners I might have? What business is it of yours?
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Staying with one's partner (particularly when children are involved) and not separating on a whim is a good thing isn't it? It's good for the kids and good for society, surely?

Re-establishing that having a relationship (again, particularly when there is or might be offspring) comes with responsibility is society's business and is worth pursuing. Broken families are and do have poor societal outcomes.
 
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Nihilism: belief that life is without objective meaning, purpose, or intrinsic value. They reject established religious, moral, and social beliefs, often concluding that because nothing matters fundamentally, human existence is useless. This mindset can range from apathy to extreme cynicism, viewing all values as baseless.

Porn follows directly from a nihilistic world view and there are some such adherents here.
 
Poem, this is the most dishonest conversation.

1. You DIDN'T cite any data. You just made a claim.
2. You demonstrated no causal link between absent fathers and porn. Even if it was true there are more absent fathers in the US, (which I doubt) you didn't show that porn is any less available in Europe, Japan etc.
3. The US isn't a monolith. I'd bet there is dramatic differences in absentee father depending on demographics.

Finally, a quick look at more direct causes show much more substantive causes such as economic disparity, lack of sex education, availability of inexpensive contraception and lastly, the high volume of incarceration.
 
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