Butter IMO in this thread is the textbook example of how these emotional and occasionally vitriolic discussions exert a radicalizing pressure on actual well meaning moderates. It happens on message boards all the time.
Moderate person starts out with their own comfortable understanding of the situation. Extremist talks about ‘horrible things x and y that Group are doing!’ Moderate goes ‘wow is that true? I hadn’t thought that was happening, but I read the thing you posted and it sounds bad. It would be bad if Group is really doing x and y.” Member of Group who is on their last nerve says something mean about anyone that would think Group really wants to do x and y. Moderate assumes something mean is directed squarely at them and gets understandably upset. Starts to think maybe Extremist might have a point, or at least Group wasn’t as nice as they thought.
This is totally a thing that can happen, and I think it's good to point out as a general phenomenon.
But I do feel compelled to note that it isn't happening here with me

. I'm always going to default to being a live-and-let-live hippie. I don't have to understand everything that happens. I would never turn toward anti-progress people, even if the progress people are being mean or pissing me off. It's a temporary storm. We're on the same side.
I do think that some people and organizations can be
very weird about this issue and all its interconnected satellite issues (bathrooms, jail, sports, sex, language, doctors, kids - the list is endless), BUT I also think said weirdness mostly comes from a place of fierce protection for the rights of a disadvantaged group. And the world's kind of scary right now for disadvantaged groups, especially in the US with all the alt-right BS, and Trump's military ban tweets, and all sorts of horrible, sinister ****. So maybe the dialogue will stabilize a little and become more balanced as time passes and things chill out and the proverbial sky does not, in fact, fall.
I would like to apologize to
Archie - for making assumptions and jumping all over you. Your response to me was gracious, considering my tone. Same to you,
LondonJohn (even though I haven't read your response to me yet, if there is one, lol - it may be a doozy). I did freak out because I was frustrated, but that wasn't the main issue with me. I'm having a bad day, and if it hadn't been this debate that made me pop off, it would have been something else. I'm sorry.
I was going to flounce and sulk, but as soon as I calmed down a bit, I realized it would be much better to return and say "my bad."