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Seen today in Blue Ridge, GA

William Parcher said:
I'm skipping the video. Does it say where it was found and what environment? Any pictures in situ before collection? Is this really a Dr. Matthew Johnson project?
Click to expand...

Yeah, it's Dr. Matthew Johnson, who doesn't know how to use the camera on his phone.

Here's a second video featuring the turd, and another exhibiting how far gone this guy is. He's so far out there that I'm not even going to bother with anything connected to him anymore.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prMxzBHSStQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da_H80oqQE8
 
Im dying laughing every time he says "3 foot turd" during that presentation.

This is the best BF thread ever.
 
Mike! said:
More likely removable magnetics. Then any vehicle can be instantly converted into a "Bigfoot Research and Tech Vehicle" at a moments notice.
Except new Ford trucks. They're made of aluminum.

ETA: How, would any earthly creature, Figboot, or anything else, lay such a log, in such a long straight line? Get up to a good run and just hork it out mid-stride? I mean, seriously, this is a more important question than what did it, it's HOW, how it did it???
Click to expand...

It shoots out horizontal at high speed and squidges down like toothpaste from a tube.

Think of this when you brush your teeth tonight.
 
On my Facebook feed this morning:

38904551044_4220ee2117_z.jpg
 
Captain_Swoop said:
It shoots out horizontal at high speed and squidges down like toothpaste from a tube.

Think of this when you brush your teeth tonight.
Click to expand...

I'm guessing you've done the necessary scientific research to back this up, including, but not limited to, creative scale modeling that would be required to verify the above linear excrement hypotenuse, so I won't bother to ask, and will simply take you at your word. Thanks again for the colorful and vivid explanation.
 
The whole thing is another example of the pseudoscience on display with the turd. I mean, a 33" turd sounds impressive, right? It must be from a bigfoot, right? Well, how long are human and/or black bear poops when laid end-to-end on a truck bed?
 
Mike! said:
How, would any earthly creature, Figboot, or anything else, lay such a log, in such a long straight line? Get up to a good run and just hork it out mid-stride? I mean, seriously, this is a more important question than what did it, it's HOW, how it did it???
Click to expand...
It might not be the work of a single Bigfoot. Think of an assistant such as a doctor delivering a baby. A Bigfoot needs to poop and he has a buddy with him. The buddy uses his hands to delicately "deliver" the turd as a single continuous emission. This behavior could be instinctual or maybe culturally derived.
 
William Parcher said:
It might not be the work of a single Bigfoot. Think of an assistant such as a doctor delivering a baby. A Bigfoot needs to poop and he has a buddy with him. The buddy uses his hands to delicately "deliver" the turd as a single continuous emission. This behavior could be instinctual or maybe culturally derived.
Click to expand...

That's just stupid, you should be embarrassed. If you look at the clasper of a dragonfly you will see that they are perfectly shaped for this operation, assuming a very large dragonfly, of course.
 
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