Let me try.
If you think that illegal immigration is a problem (as I do), and that the government should do something about it, a lot of people will call you a racist.
If you support gay marriage, but think that it's ok for a baker to turn down a wedding cake order, I can guarantee you will be called a bigot.
If you think that girls who are perfectly normal, except that they have penises, ought to use a different locker room than the girls that don't have penises, you are a bigot.
Well, a lot of people agree with some or all of those positions, and they don't really feel like bigots. When someone comes along and calls them deplorable, it ruffles their feathers. Some of those people might agree with the above statements, but not feel very strongly about them. They aren't all that significant, and not enough to change their vote. That's the way I am, for example. I agree with all of them. In other words, the "you" in the statements above could apply to me I voted for Hillary anyway because, as much as I believe those statements, I think there are bigger issues.
Nevertheless, someone out there reading this is thinking, and will probably say, that my beliefs identify me as a deplorable bigot, and despite the fact that I voted for Hillary, will say that I am a Trump sympathiser, and one of "them". Well, do that often enough to enough people, and some of those people might agree that they are indeed one of "them", and might vote accordingly.
In fact, I think somewhere around 1% of the residents of Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania did exactly that.